"No, You are not made of box! I'm surprised You had to ask!".. 😂😂😂

“We asked kids to do school on the same device they play Minecraft” As an elder gen z that graduated 2020 in the thick of Covid; he’s got a point

I’m the teacher that loses her sh*t at least twice a month 😂 I have never uttered the words “for crying out loud” until I started teaching lol

11:23 after having my 3 kids at home during the pandemic, I learned that teachers deserve more than they get, more money and more respect for having to deal with our kids EVERYDAY. Thank you teacher for your great job. 👏 👏 👏

My wife is an elementary school teacher. She had a student push her buttons so bad one day, she said a bad word. She told him to take his happy little a$$ to the office. So, she also had to go to the office and tell the principal what she did. During the meeting with the kids mother, they explained what my wife did and the kid did that drove it. The mom wasn't mad at all at my wife. She said that he had it coming.

Sounds like Chris Tuckers principal was Eddie Murphy

If you call my momma then you will have to pay the phone bill 😂😂😂❤

As a teacher I can feel some of these teachers’ pain. But I can also laugh because what else can you do? You have your good days and your bad days. But you love when you see your kids succeed and are proud of themselves. Their smiles always make me smile.

The one about prepositions was hilarious

binge watching comedy before going to sleep gives me happy dreams. 😆

Hannah was so funny... I was crying from laughing too hard all throughout her piece😂😂

Why when Hannah is telling her story all I'm picturing is the cartoon Bluey? Lmao. It must be a mom thing. But picturing it as bluey made it 100% more funnier to me hahahaha

The box bit 😂😂😂😂😂 thank you so much

As a teacher… I approve 🤣🤣🤣

“Whats yesterday?” 😂

My breaking point as a teacher, as in Mo's story, was when, for the third time in the same lesson, I had to stop a fourteen-year-old from walking around the classroom and holding up a ruler to people's groins as if it was a penis. I realized then and there that working with kids was going to make me miserable for the rest of my life, and quit soon after.

When I had a fight with my teacher, the next day the principal called me out in front of all the students as he was about to announce my one week suspension. He said "I'm suspending you for giving your teacher a very big blow" everyone started laughing.

I am a substitute teacher. Last time I was subbing for Math. And one of the students kept talking loudly, while I tried to take attendance. I kept asking them to quiet down. He didn't listen. I ended up raising my voice, but he didn't care. Moments later, I found out he did not speak English. Hmm, they can still quiet down during attendance, can't they? Anyway, for my next class period, they were also talking a lot, so I calmly said, "Hey guys I know you guys like to talk, but at least for attendance, let me take attendance quietly". It worked like magic. That was on a good day. In other schools, I have had students swearing, getting into fights, calling campus security, etc.

Lol, when I was a little kid living the hillfolk life back in Maine in the early 60's, riding inside tires down hills was the greatest fun.

I never heard of Mo Gilligan. Is he popular in england or something? Im about to search for more of his standup! 😅

The box joke murders me every time😂😅

As a new teacher this is hilarious 😂

that british dude at the end was hilarious..this applies to SA schools with British teachers as well

I’m a teacher and I think about that Mulaney bit anytime I show a video 😂

The box joke was great

Kenny Sebastian is so underated !!!he is a great stand up comedian and music artist.

The puppet story almost killed me 😂😂😂

Chris Tucker's friendly principal reminded me of mine. Something happened, and I needed to tell her about a life and death emergency. I had never done that before, so I didnt handle it as well as I could have. I walked into the principal's office, right past the receptionist, and into the principal's office and shut the door and sat down in one of the guest chairs. Nobody has ever done that, and if she made a list of the most likely people to do it, I would not have been on the list. So I had her attention, because she knew whatever happened next was going to be the most interesting thing of the day, maybe month. "Can I help you?" (Slightly accusatorial, as I was an invader, but also genuinly curious) "Yeah. Andy just asked me to help him kill himself." About this time, the receptionist has come out from behind her desk, and opened the door to see what was going on. The principal dismissed her, "That's alright, thanks." Then turned to me, trying to be as serious as she could without being scary, "Are you serious?" Because "we" have performed jokes about as tasteless before, so not unreasonable to ask. "Yes." I said, with no hint of irony or levity. "OK, thanks, can you send the receptionist in?" And I left, telling the receptionist that the principal wanted to see her, the principal saying "close the door" as she entered. And I went back to class and didn't speak of it to anyone until I next saw Andy over a year later. Andy was a large boy. Held back multiple grades, not for smarts, but for behavior problems. People teased him for it. I was one of the few who treated him the same as I treat everyone else, so he considered me a friend. I was tiny. I entered high school at 4'10", and andy was taller than some teachers, and wider than all of them. He had come to me between classes and pulled me aside. We went to an empty room. He explained that he wanted to die, but if he dies by suicide, then his family wouldn't get insurance. So he was asking for help on suicide/accidents. I said, "well electrocutions are accidental, not suicides, and we are on the 3rd floor," and I walked to a window for effect, and threw it open. "But most of the area under the windows is grass, which would hurt and break things, but wouldnt be fatal. Also hard to make it look accidental. Let me think about it some and we'll talk after I think up some options.". I wanted him to have something to wait for, think about, so I didnt leave him suicidal next to an open wondow with hopes of being successful in his attempt. And that's when I went to thr principal's office. When he came back to school, I was worried he would be mad. He found me his first day back, and tried to apologize for putting me in that position, but failed the apology so bad he had to have been ordered to do it by a parent or therapist. But he did manage a genuine "thanks" for getting him back into the institution that day for help he needed. I was 14 or 15 at the time. The principal sent a kid to an institution off my word. But I'm sure they asked Andy first, and he would have admitted it. Nobody gave Andy a hard time about it, because only the teacher and me knew why he disappeared that day and wasnt back for a year. But once back, he was supposed to be more open, and he talked about it, so I had kids asking me about it from him, so figured it was no longer a secret I had to keep. All because the principal was trusting enough when a problem was reported to her from one of the students she knew of, but we had hardly exchanged more than a "hello" before that. It must have been early in the year. 35 years ago, that detail is gone from my memory.

Loved Hannah's! Mostly because it strengthened my suspicion that I'm on the spectrum and it was nice to find a kindred spirit 😅

I'm a high school teacher who asks my students consistently, "for the love of God what are you doing?!"

I’m so happy, that I’m not the only one who had weird teachers, when I was younger!!!

Chris Tucker is literally telling you how little support teachers get from admin without even knowing it. Imagine a principal being sent kids acting up in class and all they do is hang out with the kid rather than redirect the behavior. Now imagine that being the NORM! It's not funny so much as it's very sad. That's why teachers are leaving.

Wow, this is a masterpiece. The scenes looking down the roads with the sun in your eyes is my favorite. Great work!

Mo Gilligan's true calling, in my opinion would be as an Actor. I'm asking myself: "Why haven't I heard of this charming young Brit until Now?" 😘

I have dated about 4 teachers over the course of my life and every single 1 of them was just a total train wreck of substance abuse. Personally I've been teaching English as a foreign language now for 7 years And have definitely not been on my best behavior. Darn right that's why I show videos during class

I see John Mulaney, I click.

12:18 happened to me just this week LMAO

The quick joke at the start was perfect, like 🤯

"The movement of water through a semi-permeable membrane to a place of higher solute concentration." Mic drop, Exit Stage Left, with Swagger.

12:07 hey that’s me! I’m one of my Spanish teacher’s “favorites” because I always get my work done on time and I guess I remind her of her younger self or something, but she trusts me with her life. Some of my guy friends sit at the table with me in Spanish and talk and goof off the whole time while I do all the group work (which I actually prefer I love working alone) and when they get yelled at to stop talking I defend them with the “they were talking about the work, I’m just writing everything because I have nice handwriting” and she almost always believes me! It’s nice being the class pet when you can use it to defend your goofball friends

"No Brandon. We all know what shit is. It's what you're full of." To be fair, my 6th grade teacher was right. But she should've retired before she started hating children.

To the mean acting teacher problem: One day, we asked my little sister (she was 8 at the time in 3rd grade) how school was. Her response: “Ouuhhhgg my German teacher is having marriage problems.” We asked how she knew about it: “She’s just so angry this week.”

Hannah talked about going from teachers pet to teachers nemesis. When I was in second grade, we had thr first parent conferences coming up. It was close to Halloween, so thr teacher ordered us to art. We were instructed to "draw a man with two orange heads." I have dysgraphia, so my drawings sucked. I couldn't physically draw a man with two heads. Best I could do was a man that looked normal, then a tumor on his shoulder. So I came up with something I could draw. I handed in a drawing of a man. A regular man. And in each hand, he held one orange Jack o'Lantern. I was proud of my man, with two orange heads. So the teacher dragged me to the principal's office and I was paddled for insubordination and disruptive behavior, or something like that. At the time, that was criminal assault and battery and child abuse. A law had been passed that required parentap notification of all corporate punishment. Withiut notification, it was treated like the rest of the penal code. When parent day came, I went in with mom, and tonthe classroom. The aelrt was up, and she couldn't find mine. So I told the story, though not nearly so eloquently, as I was just 7 years old. So she demanded the story from thr teacher, who told the story because she still didnt think she did anything wrong. So my mom stormed to the principal's office to scream at the principal, and explain the backstory, which he wasnt given at the time. Realizing he had done the wrong thing, he was much nicer after. But for most days between that and the end of the year, the teacher would lock me in a closet over lunch, and send me to the unlocked closet in class. She couldnt lock me in the class closet, because if anyone came in, she could call me back and ask if I found those pens she sent me to get. But unlocking the closet to get me would have given away the full story. But the supply closet I was locked in over lunch was never used, so nobody would check, so she felt comfortsble locking me in. Good thing there were no fires while I was there. I eas never the pet, but I went from "mostly ignored" to "nemesis" with a single drawing. John J Pershing Elementary. Dallas ISD.

13:16 Why do so many people have osmosis confused with diffusion? It's like a berenstain bears thing

Ms. Fortune is on the dot. All our playgrounds were lined with shredded tires!

As a teacher, can confirm 😂

Now I know what prepositions are

As a teacher I appreciate this

The box joke murders me every time

That's why teachers show videos? 😆 Seeing your teacher drunk at a restaurant with your family is the worst!

Not sure why Hannah Gadsby gets so much hate. Is she the greatest comic ever? No. But she’s still enjoyable and clearly a gifted writer.

To this day I remember when my middle school orchestra teacher exploded. He slammed his fist down on his stand and it got everyone's attention. A few seconds later he was like "I think I broke it." We all laughed at him. The next he showed up with his hand in a cast. Turns out he did break it.

The puppets at 5:15 took me out 😂😂😂😂😂

I ended up teaching English in Korea longer than expected. I have a newfound respect for teachers and am affirmed I never want children.

When teacher started LOADING UP ..😅

Her move for rolling the tire shows she never really rolled one

Excellent Mix!

I haven't seen the Douglas special yet. I wasn't ready. Laughing so hard I think I've injured myself

"What is yesterday?" I remember asking something like that also, lol smh . Who's fault fornotknowing? Me,, my teacher or my mother? Not my teacher's fault,.😢

That was totally recess in the 80's! We had those big ass tires in Arizona too!

Amen to the 80s recess!!!! I was in a San francisco elementary school, so it was all cement but that was basically how it was. Dodge balls to the face and teacher were either fun and thought we were silly cute funny kids or the bitter lady (all women then) who detested children, which I never understood. But bloody lips and broken bones were all part of being a kid. Now, honestly, I don't know how to describe because I don't understand it

Chris Tuckers principal talking like Eddie Murphy 😭😂😂

I came from a small town up north that had a tire park. Huge tires like that are positioned in different ways, but old school, and they didn't take all the nails out 😂

Hannah Gadsby is so me lol

AM I MADE OF BOX lollll

the tires!!!! OMG!!

I was the oldest child so inbetween zoom classes i was making all my siblings snacks, lunch, giving them games, etc cause they finished their school before 9 am

Bro at the end actually explained diffusion not Osmosis. It was close, but Osmosis specifically involves H2O.

Home maid puppets… lol

she should've said "where you are in relation to the box" which might've still confused you but also might not have XD also chris tucker's principal sounds like my best friend's principal who once asked her "make anyone cry today?" and she said "not yet" XD

Im willing to admit hannah gadsby is fkn hilarious. Every neuro atypical or queer ive introduced her to has had laughing fits while watching her specials.

I feel like Hannah's stand up is for a certain type of crowd. I definitely dont mind/was able to watch 2 of her specials a while back but i can see why others wouldnt like it lol

whoa that last guy was frickin' relatable😂

Love the guys who take months preparing for a five minute presentation judge folks presenting 6-8 hours every day. Lol

3:48 omg that is so ironic

How does Sarah Silverman get the "airbrush" look while everyone else does not?

Omg!!! The guy at the end too funny!!! 😅😅😅😮😮😮

I've asked kids in my class to answer a question when they weren't listening before... except in real life, instead of knowing what osmosis is, they couldn't tell me major plot points that had just been discussed over multiple pages in our book. And that last line is so infuriating. "I'd be listening if you were doing your job and teaching?" Just because something sounds clever doesn't magically make it true. The reason class stopped in the first place is because the teacher WAS teaching and you were NOT listening, preventing yourself and other students from paying attention to important information. Sorry... I have a kid like you in my class, so this is very triggering, lol.

I had to watch a video of a baby being born... I guess my teacher was hungover and lost for words.. 😅

My elementary school had an entire pyramid of tractor tires that were bolted together. We would gather every morning to establish some kind of daily pecking order like monkeys in a tree.

I had a classmate who became a gym teacher. When he drank too much the night before, the next morning in class he would play the game "who can be the quietest"....in gym class!! I don't believe he was there very long because he always smelled like a brewery.

Last comedian still doesn't realize that he was the a**hole in that situation. I'm very sure I've accused the wrong student of taking before, but not unless that student had been making my life hell from being a jerk of a student countless times before that.

I remember a day when my teacher lost it. Someone tried to defend someone else because she was clearly fucking psycho and she just threw her reading glasses across the room. Such a weird day.

My 7th grade English teacher was a notorious booze bag and he constantly showed up to class hungover and would play movies

We actually did that tire thing in daycare when I was like 7-8 in AZ. She's not kidding that's an actual thing. We would also stack the big tractor tires and kids would crawl in, then the older kids would drop the smaller tires in the middle and trap them in there to see how long they could go without crying to get out.

He is SAVAGE. Bring back the savage. Bring back the things you "can't say". If it couldn't be said, an audience wouldn't laugh. Life is hard for all. As we say in Jamaica" take bad thing make joke". That's how you life a long life. In today's world, an easy trigger means a sooner death. Natural selection. Learn to laugh. Laughter is healing.

Its made of fucking penguin 😂😂😂

And that explains a lot why teacher are quitting

Obviously those anti-crack assemblys didn't work well on John Mulaney, haha

Not sure about the video thing. At my school videos weren't allowed unless we got it approved in advance and it had to fit in with the overall lesson objectives.

Most teachers can drink anyone under the table. Frankly, most of us didn’t drink until after we started teaching. lol Yes, we do love our kids and we care about them. We are also human and kids will test the most dedicated teacher. God bless the educators. ❤️❤️❤️

1957 my 1st grade sick with every dease in the books miss halfbthe school year. Measles, mumps ect. Last day of 1st grade read my report card the teacher flunked me. I went to her desk, "Mrs Sheep why you flunk me. I know my numbers, letters, how to write my name". Anyway Mrs Sheep stated, "Son I know you can write your name, know your letters and numbers. But boy I been trying to tell you for over a year. My name isnt Mrs Sheep. Its Mrs Lamb"!True story.

Hannah Gadsby sounds like Randy Feltface with a higher voice

He was right about weight sort of but it doesn’t increase in density.

Sorry, who is performing at like 7:40 because I relate? Thank you & much love :)

Holy F how do some of these even sell a single ticket

How drunk is Fortune Feimster?!

I’m related to a box?

1 st grade the penguin lost it picked up a potted house plant and flung it over our heads into the side board. The dirt just exploded everywhere. 🌀

13:20 and people clapped.