Bad Dialogue vs Good Dialogue (Writing Advice)
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День томуLearn what separates bad dialogue from good dialogue. Examples from Star Wars, Game of Thrones, John Wick, Castlevania, and more!
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0:00 Intro
0:49 Good Dialogue
2:23 Bad Dialogue
2:42 On The Nose Dialogue
5:06 Melodramatic Dialogue
8:08 "As You Know, Bob" Dialogue
10:52 Forced Poetry Dialogue
12:59 Wooden Dialogue
15:27 Outro
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Credit to SkyDilen for my video intro.
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@Water_Me_Loan_64_YT 11 місяців тому
My favorite example of Bad dialogue is “Somehow, Palpatine returned.” from Star Wars Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker.
@MarysiaKosowski 11 місяців тому
For me, it was in episode VII where they said, "This was the Death Star...and THIS is the Starkiller!" or whatever the hell they called it, and showed a picture of the exact same super-weapon, only bigger and badder than ever because Disney is telling us this is so. Unoriginal and cheesy.
@alexchapman8927 11 місяців тому
@@MarysiaKosowski But profitable. Which is the only thing Disney cares about.
@Lennis01 11 місяців тому
@@alexchapman8927 Not so much anymore.
@RandomCarrot2806 11 місяців тому
@@alexchapman8927 Was it? They paid 4billion for the brand, spent another 2 billion producing the films for just over a 10billion world wide gross. Now on the surface, that looks like a 4billion profit, but here's the kicker. Studios generally spend 50-100% of the budget of a film on marketing after so that's at minimum another billion spent, then you have to factor in that studios don't get the total gross from cinemas, in America where the studios get the highest cut they take home something like 55-65% and it's much lower internationally. At best, they might have broken even on the films and that's carried heavily by the first 2 ones. There's a reason they stopped producing films and all we get is rumors about something in development over and over. And if you think the Star Wars shows will have saved the profitability of the brand, Disney has had massive losses coming from establishing Disney+ as a streaming platform and a large part of those losses have been Star Wars. They have been taken losses on toy and merchandise sales too, the Star Wars Hotel thing they tried has been an unmitigated disaster. So no, it definitely hasn't been profitable overall, and especially not the last 5 years.
@avistryfe4534 11 місяців тому
Lol
@kevinsupreme_ph36yearsago59 2 роки тому
I just realized that bad movie dialogue is how people actually talk in real life.
@WriterBrandonMcNulty 2 роки тому
Aimless, clumsy, stilted... I give you... human speech!
@sn_258 2 роки тому
can i have a dozen red roses please
@kaydens6964 Рік тому
You are right, people usually going around saying " I dont want it" " you are my ___ !"
@mello.1483 Рік тому
@@sn_258 that actually works lmao
@brunoactis1104 Рік тому
New York, Argentina, Italy, Spain, Cuba, etc: Whatsamattayou?
@lucasweber6147 10 місяців тому
“What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets!” 😂😂😂 That’s awesome dialogue tbh
@sawanna508 9 місяців тому
I liked all of the lines from Dracula.
@kered13 7 місяців тому
The dialog is campy, but it works really well given the context! I can't agree that it's bad dialog. There's no time to create an emotional scene, and it is natural that Belmont is automatically hostile towards Dracula.
@WheelAlligatesX2 2 місяці тому
I like it a lot because it is theatrical, very over the top, which worked! (probably not in the way the writers intended). It's a situation of trying to be good for drama but ending up being good for being unintentionally funny (not funny for being bad).
@liacmays Місяць тому
Yes it was so funny I highly enjoyable!
@ggoannas Місяць тому
It is much more a case of bad acting than bad dialog.
@ramflight 7 місяців тому
"This is not the day I die." ~Oberyn Martell the day he died 😂
@misskc82 27 днів тому
Haha!
@danjohnson93 6 днів тому
Foreshadowing!
@DMurdock 11 місяців тому
The Star Wars scene was a missed opportunity. I believe the intention was to show how different Anakin's and Padme's backgrounds are. Anakin grew up as a slave in Tatooine while Padme grew up in luxury. Padme likes sand because it reminds her of the beach while Anakin hates sand because it reminds him of the empty desert.
@TheoRae8289 11 місяців тому
The delivery is what makes it bad
@moranplano 11 місяців тому
@@TheoRae8289 Agreed, that actor ruined the movie. Everyone else was on point, but Anakin was flat in every line....it's like the cast had to all 'act around' him. Too bad.
@DMurdock 11 місяців тому
@@moranplano I blame George Lucas more. He managed to squeeze out some mediocre performances from Natalie Portman, an otherwise phenomenal actress. Even Hayden Christensen had a Golden Globe nomination under his belt when he entered the franchise.
@lucasperkins4342 11 місяців тому
@@TheoRae8289 Nope, it was the dialogue. The delivery could have been much better, but totally GL's fault. (He was also the one who chose HC.) But when both the writing and acting are bad, it's tough to tell.
@iso460 11 місяців тому
@@moranplano the problem was again a bad decision by Lucas. He wanted Anakin to sound like Vader without a mask, thats why Hayden isnt allowed to show any emotions. Which makes no sense, bc we see Anakin as a human with emotions and are supposed to feel for him. It creates a distance between te audience and the protagonist. Lucas has a very creative mind but he just messes it up sometimes
@bookvideos 11 місяців тому
I totally disagree about the Frodo / Bilbo scene about Frodo's parents. The point is: Frodo idolized Bilbo and is shocked at his uncle's confession. Bilbo is actually revealing something Frodo doesn't know... about Bilbo's character. Of course Frodo knows Bilbo took him in after his parents died, but Bilbo is now confessing WHY he did.... which is something Bilbo himself didn't even know until he came to this revelation and confession. That's why Bilbo says" I'm very selfish you know... YES I AM... very selfish" - that "yes I am" is because he knew his sweet, tender hearted nephew was going to automatically disagree with him. Bilbo needs to get it off his chest and didn't want to be defended. Frodo doesn't think of Bilbo as selfish. This may be the first truly honest and vulnerable thing Bilbo has ever said to his nephew.... and Bilbo is only brave enough to confess it because he's leaving. It's an important moment.
@danielbanta2019 11 місяців тому
Well put
@DJHansYolo 10 місяців тому
I agree. Very well said. To call it lazy writing is absurd. The line wasn't written to tell the audience about Frodo's parents (which is wholly irrelevant to the story) it was to demonstrate how the characters feel about each other (in the subtext and very relevant) and give importance to Bilbo's disappearing act in the next scene. This line in particular is loaded with subtext as Bilbo is leaving and Frodo doesn't know but suspects he's up to something. Bilbo still wants to leave Frodo with parting words of confidence, "You're the only one who showed real spirit...you'll be alright." Without this exchange, the audience wouldn't feel anything when Frodo later busts into Bag End looking for his dear uncle. "I didn't think he'd actually do it. 😢"
@bookvideos 10 місяців тому
@@danielbanta2019 Thanks Daniel
@bookvideos 10 місяців тому
@@DJHansYolo Thanks Joe. I really enjoyed the video up to that point, but his take on this scene was so off-base I had to comment. You made excellent points as well!
@GeeGe. 10 місяців тому
Honestly having a hard time enjoying the rest of the video after that. Such a bad take to call that scene lazy writing.
@illseeyaonthedarksideofthemoon 10 місяців тому
The Frodo and Bilbo conversation serves as a new light in a character that seems like nothing but goodness at first, it reveals a complex side and serves as an understanding for his motivations to leave the Shrine, it is not exposition is characterisation. And, even if it was "bad", the superb acting shows perfectly the face of an old man's confession, after all, good dialog is nothing if delivered incorrectly.
@seriousnesstv7902 7 місяців тому
I think many people confuse bad dialogue with people who are bad many times.
@illseeyaonthedarksideofthemoon 7 місяців тому
@@seriousnesstv7902 I think the problem is that people expect good dialogue to be realistic, when cinema is viewed with a dramatic lent, of course there should be an element of relativity, but it is still exaggerated for theatrics.
@seriousnesstv7902 7 місяців тому
@@illseeyaonthedarksideofthemoon good dialogue can’t be realistic and it’s a paradox because often times realistic dialogue is often said to be bad.
@thebreifcaseman269 3 місяці тому
@@seriousnesstv7902fuck the kings guard, fuck the city and fuck the king. Isn't really something someone would say in that situation. Let's be honest what matters more is weather is aline's with your characters personality.
@bobcunningham9590 Місяць тому
"Luke. I am your father." I mean, that's sucky, horrible writing, because it's "on the nose," right? Darth should have have danced around the subject, maybe talked about "that fishing trip," to which Luke would have responded, "I never went fishing; I grew up in a desert," at which point Darth would have removed a locket from the grip of his saber, and tossed it to Luke, and the tears streaming down Darth's mask would have said everything; cut to Hayden Christensen and young Haley Joel Osment fishing on the banks of a really nice river, chewing straw; then flash back to Luke's dawning realization in present time. //
@srhatfield 7 місяців тому
I will give you an example where the actor fixed the bad writing: Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back Princess Leia to Han Solo: "I love you" Han Solo: “Just remember that, ’cause I’ll be back.” As we all know, that is not what was said... Harrison Ford looked at the script, tossed it on a table and when the time came, he responded "I know". Magic!
@EricPorter1 11 місяців тому
Bilbo's dialogue is on point. He is drunk, he feels guilty because he is going to leave Hobbiton without telling Frodo, and he is telling Frodo he is selfish to make an excuse for what is about to happen and prepare Frodo. It is not a "as you know bob" moment.
@PaulTobelmann 11 місяців тому
The reference to Frodo's parents dying is stilted, though.
@aholcomb100 11 місяців тому
One of the great things about great writers is they know the rules of good writing. One of those rules is knowing when to break or bend the rules. It may be stilted, and Bilbo may be repeating information both of them already know, but as Eric said...he's drunk and feels guilty. I have definitely had those awkward, stilted, conversations while drunk where I'm repeating stuff everyone knows, and everyone KNOWS everyone knows... but you just....can't....help yourself. You gotta say it because you can't get it out of your head. :P I feel like that's what makes it a GOOD dialogue because it's so natural! It makes Bilbo, the hero...the star of the party...as HUMAN (well, Halfling).
@johnnyritenbaugh1214 11 місяців тому
Right? Plus this is just how very old people talk. They tell you the same stories you have heard a dozen times, but there is no stopping them from telling it again. Out of respect, you just listen to it for the umpteenth time. 😅
@bookvideos 11 місяців тому
totally agree.
@jenniferhanses 11 місяців тому
Agree. He's being maudlin. And Frodo DID NOT KNOW Bilbo was selfish. This is a revelation to him. And the audience did not know Bilbo felt that way about his own actions any more than Frodo did. Bilbo is a hero admitting to having some not obvious flaws.
@Bout_TreeFiddy Рік тому
"I got the results of the tests back. I definitely have breast cancer." -Lisa's mom, The Room
@WriterBrandonMcNulty Рік тому
And the best part is that it never gets addressed again hahah
@DoroteoVilla Рік тому
That’s GREAT dialogue!
@jojo_n_dat7325 Рік тому
@@WriterBrandonMcNulty I'm going to challenge you just for fun, why is it bad that it doesn't get addressed again?
@lordmarcel902 Рік тому
@@jojo_n_dat7325 Because it adds nothing to the plot, the character connections or the world building. So it's pointless. Funny story: I watched this movie a few times by now. But just a few weeks ago I realized, what the point behind the Danny drugdealer story was. It was to bring the gun into the story, which is later used by Johnny to kill himself.
@kintamas4425 Рік тому
@@WriterBrandonMcNulty thank you so much! I guess I should have just looked it up, but I never quite got what melodrama was.
@Schrodinger_ 10 місяців тому
Thank you Brandon, this was very helpful! As you know, Brandon, some of us writers out there use bad dialogue, and need help writing better dialogue. And you, Brandon, are a writer who makes youtube videos to help other writers. I feel very grateful that you wrote this, as I was having writer's block and it was agony! Now I am extremely relieved. Just as the flowers are in pain in the hot dry sun until the wonderful raindrops fall to breath them back to life. And now, I will write the greatest book the world has ever seen, and the entire writing industry will be under my thumb! Mwahaha!
@WriterBrandonMcNulty 10 місяців тому
Hahaha you’ve learned well!!
@geoffbomford2927 20 днів тому
"Is it raining, I hadn't noticed" - last scene of 4 Weddings and a Funeral.
@MjolnirFeaw Рік тому
Like often I feel calling Anakin's dialogues bad is a little unfair. They are clumsy, over the top and on the nose... because he is. The guy never had a healthy humanrelationship. The closest thing he has to a friend is a guy he litterally has to call 'master'. And that is the subtext: Anakin is well... socially impaired.
@samwill5 11 місяців тому
I agree. It's just so rare to meet such people in real life people write it off as unrealistic but it absolutely can be.
@Basoosh 11 місяців тому
Even when Anakin isn't involved, the dialogue of that film is pretty bad. Anakin's dialogue could work for the character, but the rest of the movie puts a magnifying glass on it instead of providing it cover.
@nathanielguggenheim5522 10 місяців тому
Problem is, this character trait leads to nothing. It is not developed. So it's more likely just bad craftmenship.
@ethanfetaya 10 місяців тому
Usually when you have bad dialog because a character is socially impaired, you have some character in the movie say something about it, or about the speaker, so it is clear what it is
@MjolnirFeaw 10 місяців тому
@@ethanfetaya good point
@Awec4 2 роки тому
Completely wrong about the Lord of the Rings dialogue, it's not remotely an "as you know" moment, since it's clear that Frodo does not think of Bilbo as selfish, and Bilbo saying "you know" is literally just speaking style, and not a declaration that Frodo should already know this. There's also a ton of conflict there; Bilbo knows he's about to leave the Shire for a long time and is trying to have a heart-to-heart with Frodo before he goes, but isn't sure how to go about it. It's absolutely fantastic dialogue
@quirkyjoeAnimated Рік тому
Yeah, it feels like Bilbo is trying to 'close the book' on his parenting role to Frodo and express how he feels about it before he leaves him, but can't quite find the words - and Frodo dismisses it as the drink talking.
@electrodeboy Рік тому
Sooooo agree with this comment! I was going to write something similar, but you already did …also the John wick scene comparison is NOT better!
@Libra0Rising Рік тому
I agree. I haven't even seen LotR and it seemed like a bad example to me. The rest of the list seemed spot on though.
@Selrisitai Рік тому
Even as someone who has never seen the Lord of the Rings, I could tell that there was quality in the dialogue. The only exception would be if both characters _did_ know that Bilbo was selfish, but the implication, to me, seemed to be that Frodo did not think of Bilbo as selfish and Bilbo was trying to come clean on how he saw himself.
@dielanschamber8730 Рік тому
Bro, dude calling Tolkien's work lazy writing is something 😅😅🤣
@hansyepezliut8086 7 місяців тому
This video impels me to acknowledge that "bad dialogue" doth possess a singular charm, and I derive great pleasure from its embrace.
@lightbringer131 10 місяців тому
Anakin's journey into the dark side, into the sith means he starts acknowledging his raw feelings, his innermost desires. That scene demonstrates exactly that, it is actually a very good way to tell us he is on his way to express his feelings in an unfiltered way.
@rome8180 Рік тому
Another reason the Back to the Future dialogue works is that it has a payoff later. Marty says his mother would go on and on about "how she never did anything like that when she was a kid." He says "she was practically born a nun." But later we see how false both of those things are when he encounters his mother as a teenager in the past. Obviously, we don't know those things when we're watching this scene for the first time, but it adds to the replay value.
@stoopidapples1596 Рік тому
BTTF is the definition of replay value!
@2313rafa Рік тому
Not only that, but it reflects how one perceived her to he because of the point of view from the son. Another theme thought to have resonated is this subtle notion of parents having done crazy things, but kids think they never lived through crazy or fun times. It depicts the separation and miscommunication both have, a trypical sentiment felt amongst adults and their kids, but also how kids feel about their parents! It reflects the disconnect, which adds that spice to the whole complex relationship with his mother. It does it so subtly that you don't really know how much weight some scenes hold.
@towanda1067 Рік тому
It’s a classic setup to prepare us for what comes later.
@robhulson Рік тому
I’d call this foreshadowing, but in the case of BTTF, it’s beforeshadowing.
@RobertoCarmona13 Рік тому
Perhaps she really was like that when she was young because she never had someone who really attracted her to do those things. I think at first she never liked too much her husband George, she even says at the begginin that she 'felt sorry for him' when her dad ran George over with the car. In Marty she found someone who REALLY likes her and someone exactly as she needed, she said in Doc's garage she wanted someone brave, someone who defends the woman he loves, things George never did... And as the movie goes on, she fell more in love with Marty for being brave and mysterious referring him as a "dream", it all ends when they kiss and she felt unconfourtable, and finally when she sees how George changed to be more like Marty.
@JMichaelGreenback 2 роки тому
There's a scene in The Iron Giant where a fictional monster movie plays on the TV. The dialogue was intentionally bad for comedic effect, and it's hilarious.
@WriterBrandonMcNulty 2 роки тому
Ah, nice--that's a clever way of using it. Somehow I never watched that movie as a kid. Gotta add it to my list
@volitones8936 Рік тому
@@WriterBrandonMcNulty Prince of Egypt, Road to El Durado are recommended too
@WriterBrandonMcNulty Рік тому
@@volitones8936 Good to know!
@METT-TC Рік тому
@@WriterBrandonMcNulty iron giant is an absolute gem. Makes me cry ugly tears every time.
@Carpatouille Рік тому
@@volitones8936 3 of the best animated movies ever made. Prince of Egypt tops them, but Iron Giant is a lot more fun to watch
@JimElek 5 місяців тому
It's funny, but you pointing out that Anakin's dialogue is too "on the nose" made me realize that it actually makes sense for his character especially when contrasted with Marty and Jennifer. Marty and Jennifer are American seniors in high school. Presumably, they have some prior experience with romance and courtship. Plus, they are an established couple. Their dialogue is going to be more natural and playful. Anakin's only experience with romance is a nine-year-old's crush on a teenage girl. Of course, his dialogue is going to be awkward and "on the nose". The problem isn't that Anakin is saying exactly how he feels, it's pretty much everything else in that scene (the delivery, Padme's reaction, etc.)
@omegaminoseer4539 2 місяці тому
It's also poorly demonstrating some subtext. Anakin is actually mocking Padme for how easy her life was. She lives on a lush, tropical planet-as a Queen. He was the son of a slave who had to hustle Podraces for money. However, he still loved her and wished for there to be some way for them to be together. He hoped-beyond hope-that they would have such a chance.
@EddieM1994 Місяць тому
It makes me think of an awkward teenager trying too hard, which I think is very Anakin.
@jellyjohn7881 21 день тому
The issue is that it's not just Anakin. Every character in the prequels comes off as jarring and awkward. Listen to Mace Windu, Padme, Obi Wan, etc. It's not how the supposed peacekeepers and politicians of the Star Wars universe are supposed to sound
@FrankColesMadeEasy 11 днів тому
I thought that as well. The whole point of the scene is we see clearly the emotionally stunted child that will be manipulated and seek darker things. He needed an adult. His lover is an adult child. And his mentor is pretty petulant too. No hope for the death father.
@dizmatt1 12 годин тому
I dislike the star wars dialogue too, it's not known for being the best example. But Anakin makes more and more sense to me as I watch it. He's a conflicted spoiled (with power) child from a traumatically poor background. He's punching above his weight, he's trying to eloquent but he's a slave boy by origin. His whole story arc is driven by his insecurities, lack of grace and need for position attention. The more you see Anakin and Vader, the more it makes sense. Even mature Vader is just an angry spoiled man entitled by power and gaslit by the Emporer. It's all on point. It lacks grace, but maybe deliberately so.
@goldenarmour7975 7 місяців тому
I think there were much better examples for the "as you know" because the LOTR scene dialogue didn't seem really bad to me. The point wasn,t to tell the audience that Bilbo is selfish in another way but more for Bilbo to explain to Frodo why he took him in and why he cares about him. Also to tell Frodo that he isn't like the others (he's not the reason why Biblo is leaving.)
@erikvonreis4117 21 день тому
Bilbo bringing up the death of Frodo's parents is the "As you know, Bob". Frodo already knows Bilbo took him in after his parents died. There's nothing wrong with the rest of the dialog. Why do so many comments miss this when it's specifically called out in the video?
@TheHellMaggot Рік тому
Richter and Dracula might be a bad dialogue exchange but "what is a man? a miserable little pile of secrets" is the best dialogue line
@matthewstobber6820 Рік тому
I came here to say this :) To this day I still say this line randomly to my wife lol.
@kayo5291 Рік тому
I thought Dracula had some insightful lines in there!
@lonelylad9818 Рік тому
Now that you mention it, the dialogue in the actual original Dracula novel is actually very good and thoughtful.
@mahabaron388 Рік тому
Dracula sounds nietzschean when he said that line
@acidreighn Рік тому
Have at you!!
@joncross8483 Рік тому
But Frodo does not know Bilbo to be selfish at all in that scene. Bilbo is attacking, just as you say happens in good dialogue, and the subtext is his guilt for having done something out of a secret selfish motivation.
@GwannTwitch Рік тому
This. Strange the sentiment he has gone unnoticed.
@citcat2220 Рік тому
Not to mention the dramatic tension - Frodo doesn’t know why Bilbo is acting so odd, and the audience has a clue but doesn’t know exactly what’s going to happen. I like John Wick but Lord of the Rings is in a complete different category
@joncross8483 Рік тому
@@citcat2220 yeah exactly very well said. I get how you could interpret the scene the way he did if you took it out of context, and I'm assuming that's what happened. If you watched the whole scene there's absolutely know way anyone could interpret this exchange as wooden exposition
@Cranky_Crone 11 місяців тому
Exactly!
@edd542 11 місяців тому
too on the nose?
@sweetmooncake6215 6 місяців тому
I loved (and still do) the cheesy dialogue between Richter and Dracula from SOTN. I could recite it and play out both characters as if my life depended on it lol. Anyway, thank you for the video. I have recently found out about your awesome channel, and I couldn't get enough. More power to you!
@vangoghloverforever 4 місяці тому
Castlevania(the show) genuinely has some of the greatest dialogue uve heard. It flows so well, and each character's dialogue fits them
@matiasbascunan8051 Місяць тому
Bishop: "You cannot enter the house of God." Demon: "God is not here." 💀
@brandonbuchner1771 Рік тому
"As you know, Bob" is literally the first 20 minutes of every single Lifetime Christmas romance movie. They are a guilty pleasure of my wife's and she watches a few every Christmas. I get a kick out of the opening dialogue every time. "Oh hey, Sandy. I haven't seen you since we worked together at your Uncle Jeff's toy store our senior year of McMillan High School." "Wow, Kurt. I forgot how much you look like my brother, Ryan who died in that car accident on April 7th, 2008." "Maybe I will see you at Judy, my mother, the Mayor's Christmas eve party." Cracks me up every single time.
@seigeengine Рік тому
Oh, I hate those. It's not because they're bad. It's because they're all the exact same movie. It's like some kind of queer seasonal monotonous stimulation torture.
@RTU130 Рік тому
Tru
@snugglyhugs8698 Рік тому
I think there's a trick to improve those moments. On your first write-through, go ahead and do the "As you know Bob" parts. Then when you go back for your first revision (or second or third or fourth or...) think "How can I SHOW this instead?" Example: "As you know Bob, my wife works at that super market. I think she could get your kids hired for the summer." changes to: "I could ask Sally to put in a word for your kids. The supermarket doesn't pay well, but its honest work." changes to: "Sally could help with getting your kids a job at Steak'n'Sprouts." and keep revising. I think the biggest lesson in how to write better is... Revision Revision Revision ...
@insensitive919 Рік тому
I will never watch Murder, She Wrote the same way again...
@math1mom 11 місяців тому
LOL
@dwigity6770 11 місяців тому
Anakin Skywalker's bad dialogue entirely makes sense for a teenager with super powers and an extreme amount of angst. I talked the same way when I was 16 and I thought everything was deep lol. The rest of the dialogue in that movie has no excuse, but Anakin's actually naive enough for it to work.
@kelavianskakier4925 11 місяців тому
But Padme is not. Older and more educated, she would have recognized it for the tripe that it was and there should have been some negative reaction, verbalized or otherwise. There wasn't. In that context it WAS supposed to be deep.
@Metaphilosopher 11 місяців тому
And it works, to the extent it does, ONLY because Anakin is like 16 years old. To the extent it doesn't work, it's because Lucas forced Hayden Christiansen to act it in the most wooden way possible. If done with the expressiveness and awkwardness implicit in adolescent angst over a first love, the dialogue would actually have worked very well BECAUSE Anakin is who he is and in the strange position in which he found himself vis-a-vis Padme. This was a failure of direction and acting, not writing.
@Crimsrn 11 місяців тому
@@Metaphilosopher anakin is 19 in ep2, padme is 24
@Crimsrn 11 місяців тому
@@Metaphilosopher and hayden is a great actor i don't think it's a failure of acting
@nathanielguggenheim5522 10 місяців тому
Writing out this dialogue the way it is laid out in this video would have been totally natural and would have rendered this discussion useless. So why not doing it right the first time.
@MyWorld-eb9oz 10 місяців тому
I get that Anakin pouring his guts out is saying the obvious, but he's really not saying it in an obvious way. I feel like it's intentional for that to be so on the nose. How is it dull? He's describing how he feels about her in such a unique way. How is there no deeper meaning to him saying she is tormenting him, even though he loves her so much. That's deep to me. So poetic. Besides, it IS natural. It's natural for Anakin. Throughout Star Wars history, Darth Vader, who IS Anakin, isn't just some shallow commander. He is very formal with his words in a way a poet would be. If Anakin talks this way in multiple scenes, clearly that's just the way he gets when he's alone with Padme. Some guys are like that in real life. They suddenly become beautiful poets whenever the girl they like, their crush, or their girlfriend is with them.
@redturtle820 7 місяців тому
"I am directly below, the enemy's scrotum." is my favorite line of bad dialogue
@blueseaturtle6031 11 місяців тому
Good dialogue: - Sounds natural - Attacks or defends - Expresses unspoken meaning (subtext) - Feelings are in subtext - Emotion boiling beneath the surface (Example, Kratos and Thor) - Verbal battle (Attack and defend) - Exposition is okay if one of the characters are learning something new and its not on the nose (perhaps paint a vivid mental picture of what it is you’re describing) Bad dialogue: - On the nose (States the obvious, exact feelings or thoughts) - Melodrama (Over exaggerated, unearned emotion) - Exposition (As you know bob lets tell the audience what the hell we are doing) (Neither character learns anything new) - Forced poetry (Doesn’t keep dialogue grounded in their character) - Wooden dialogue (Doesn’t sound natural) 12:30 quote of the video
@an_62 8 місяців тому
Thanks this makes much more sense.
@tygrenvoltaris4782 6 місяців тому
Anime: huh whats exposition!??? Thats our typical diaogue these days
@guyledouche7939 5 місяців тому
Arbitrary criteria. Star Wars dialogue did exactly as it wanted to accomplish. If it works as designed...it's good dialogue. It's just not the dialogue you've been raised on by Hollywood blockbusters for decades.
@blueseaturtle6031 5 місяців тому
@@guyledouche7939 it’s bad
@guyledouche7939 5 місяців тому
@@blueseaturtle6031 it's not. You know nothing about Star Wars.
@theuberedredspy8791 2 роки тому
I love how all of the bad dialogue types are practically anime tropes at this point.
@WriterBrandonMcNulty 2 роки тому
I don't watch a whole ton of anime, but I wonder how many of the bad dialogue tropes arise because of translation issues... Many older video games had that problem
@theuberedredspy8791 2 роки тому
@@WriterBrandonMcNulty Depends on the anime from what I've seen. Some anime just... don't have excellently written dialogue (over-exposition being the most notable problem I've seen) and others are only bad because they ran out of budget/time making the actual anime, so they put the story into Google Translate and called it a day lol
@WriterBrandonMcNulty Рік тому
@@theuberedredspy8791 I'm reading the Death Note manga right now, and the dialogue hasn't taken me out of the story, so I guess you're right---depends from story to story
@hotel_arcadia Рік тому
@@theuberedredspy8791 When it comes to anime, English is a terrible language to translate Japanese to: this is because many parts of speech that are found in English and other western languages don't exist in Japanese and vice versa, so Japanese is spoken quicker. A single word in Japanese can be an entire sentence in English: compare 動き出した to "It came to life." The problem with translating Japanese into English is that, since English is a "slower" language, the writer needs to cram in words that retain both the lipsync and semantics of the original line, while making sure it is grammatically correct. That's how the "It's over 9000!" line was made.
@lebonkerz5612 Рік тому
@@hotel_arcadia Huh, the more you know
@smu2752 4 місяці тому
"Throughout the heavens and the earth, I alone am the Honoured one." To me, I think this was a good example of a poetic/flowery one-liner from JJK (manga). The setting, and the current state of mind Gojo was in when he said this is perfect.
@FluffySylveonBoi 11 місяців тому
11:40 Well, these are the powers some may consider unnatural. My favourite bad phrase is "Oh hi, Mark."
@elliotcohen6652 11 місяців тому
The absolute BEST example of unexpected poetry is in Blazing Saddles, when Mungo comes out with the immortal line: "Don't know. Mungo only pawn in game of life."
@carlajenkins1990 8 місяців тому
And that works because it is COMEDY!
@jcspoon573 3 місяці тому
I would say "Tears in (the) rain" from BladeRunner.
@jkta97 3 місяці тому
Also, a good example of poetic dialogue is Aragorn's speech in "Return of the King." He uses a similar poetic technique to the Hound's.
@ezequielblanco8659 11 місяців тому
I'm not sure the "as you know, bob" example from lord of the rings was that bad. In any case, it would be more an example of "on the nose". When I heard it, it seemed to me that in their everyday life they only talk about trivial things, so for once Bilbo wanted to have an honest conversation, stating things that they both probably know but they never talk about. Specially more so considering this is his way of saying goodbye as he intents leaving him.
@christinesuter9954 11 місяців тому
I agree, it could also be possible that Frodo didn’t know those things about Bilbo and their relationship, maybe Bilbo never told him his true intentions before
@katier9725 9 місяців тому
It definitely works in context. Bilbo was fretting about telling Frodo the truth and it really shows in both the hesitant tone and the sudden stronger "YES, I AM" because he was finally admitting something that he knew Frodo would immediately try to deny or at least downplay. It's really not the best-picked example for this type of bad dialogue.
@danielcardona2714 3 місяці тому
2:57 “You can’t just say how your characters are feeling, that makes me feel angry!” -robot devil from Futurama (paraphrased)
@Ignirium 2 місяці тому
hahahahahahahaha
@AdamWolfe-ig8qb 7 місяців тому
While your rewrite of the Resident Evil script certainly comes out more naturally, it's missing one key thing, and that's the inclusion of the phrase "Jill sandwich"
@socalsal627 Рік тому
One favorite exchange in Game of Thrones was when Lord Baelish asks Lord Varys "Did you see it with your own eyes?" and Varys replies "With eyes I own" (since he pays children, his 'little birds', to spy for him). So many great lines in GOT, it is hard to keep track!
@TheThreatenedSwan Рік тому
They tried to be Shakespeare but were usually Sorkin.
@Bredemann100 Рік тому
Yeah from amazing dialogue to awful in the last seasons
@Schmiddelwutz2000 Рік тому
"If only you could see what I have seen with your eyes" Roy Batty
@therealrooster Рік тому
Of course it was awful, they had no more GRRM dialog they could rely on and had to come up with their own. For the first few seasons, GRRM even wrote the scripts for some episodes.
@teebob21 11 місяців тому
@@Bredemann100 It's almost like they went from GRRM writing to HBO and studio interns writing. There's a writer's strike going on right now....jokes on them: their "product" is barely sellable on the best of days, Let them strike and let them starve until they come up with better scripts.
@greengrendel Рік тому
re: "all good dialogue is conflict", some of my favourite shows and books are ones where this is not the case, and characters will just take some time to chat about each other, or joke around. It can be such good character building, and revealing of the relationships between them. I hate when dialogue is so trimmed down to the essential that characters spend all their time discussing things and never bonding.
@MimMdance Рік тому
I completely agree!
@104thironmike4 Рік тому
While I think this video is very good, it is a writer's video, which is nothing wrong in itself. But then you also have actors. And in acting, conflict is important, but what is far more important is "having a relationship", on stage, on screen, doesn't matter. Additionally impulse and of course awareness, which is a force shared with the audience. I've been writing, directing and acting, I studied acting, I translated literature from Slovene to German, I directed in the theatres, played on stage, etc. The one thing, which I always want in my writing, is for the actor to have a final say. And we may argue about it, but even when I do voice recordings with only 1 actor, this relationship then has to be build between us. If you have relationship, conflict is not necessary. That said, conflict here isn't necessarily meant as on the nose either. Conflict can be subtle and present even in the most harmonious bonding. Or, you could put it also as: sorting out differences. Conflict does not necessarily mean arguing.
@starla. Рік тому
An entire story of nothing but conflict dialogue can be boring and repetitive. I agree that bonding and humor can make us relate to characters more. This makes us care what happens to them more, too. There needs to be balance, and interludes, in the ongoing conflict. TV drama series that don’t understand this become draining and eventually the ratings fall off.
@bouncerblake Рік тому
Yes! While it can feel like a waste of screen time or a few paragraphs, more than the current plot exists to bond characters together.
@DaleStrife Рік тому
One of my favorite "hangout" scenes was in avenger's 2 I think?? Where everyone is trying to pick up Thor's hammer. There is no conflict, but there's a banter which shows more of the hero's thoughts and motivations that make them different from the other heroes.
@samplerInfo 10 місяців тому
The Back to the Future example is particularly interesting. The seemingly casual dialogue conveys both their feelings and the immediate situation/plot, but it also contains a third layer of information regarding Marty's image of his mother which will be important later. And that goes for a lot of the dialogue and scenes in the movie.
@user-qu1ww1ho6q 11 місяців тому
This deserves a sequel, "When Bad Dialog Works." Not all of it has to be comedy.😂
@spudnificent1178 Рік тому
"They're eating her, and then they're going to eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOD!" Absolutely golden dialogue.
@WriterBrandonMcNulty Рік тому
Hahaha
@Toasty_93 Рік тому
"You can't piss on hospitality!"
@richardbriggs8735 Рік тому
Exactly what I was thinking
@karami8844 11 місяців тому
Legendary.
@jesusromanpadro3853 2 місяці тому
The only reason that movie hasn't been forgotten is because of that line. 😄
@michaeldew7904 Рік тому
The first one reminds me of a Futurama episode. Robot Devil says "you can't have your characters tell you how they feel. That makes me angry". Makes your exact point.
@milo6046 10 місяців тому
No Country For Old Men has the best dialogues ever imo. So much sub text and profound meaning !
@jwork5680 10 місяців тому
as a kid back then, watching star wars, i always more focused towards Anakin's expression over what he really says, I always feel like Hayden delivered the emotion that is needed to be conveyed on screen, so i'm always curious if he's a decent actor with bad dialouge all this time
@kingetzel2755 Рік тому
One of my favorite lines of dialogue is from The Fugitive, because it contains a massive amount of subtext in an incredibly brief exchange (and supposedly was improvised): Dr. Kimble: "I didn't kill my wife!" Deputy Marshal Gerard: "I don't care!" In three words, Tommy Lee Jones says "It's not my position to determine guilt. You're a fugitive and I'm going to catch you no matter what."
@peterdebaets4590 Рік тому
Which is KEY because it turns out that (spoiler) he DOES care and works to exonerate Kimble.
@SMathai Рік тому
There are several "I don't care" moments in various movies (which I unfortunately can't remember right as I'm writing), but I'm pretty sure I enjoyed them all. It flips the script on the person who's trying to make a case, and redirects them as well as the viewer to a larger picture.
@TristanCleveland Рік тому
@@SMathai I mean, "Frankly Scarlett, I don't give a damn" must be what you're thinking right?
@SMathai Рік тому
@@TristanCleveland 100% thought of that, probably my first-ever movie experience of that general phrase... and what an impact too - the delivery of that line was a roundhouse kick to the head. Didn't mention it because the request was for "your favorite line of bad dialogue", which this one doesn't fall under.
@TristanCleveland Рік тому
@@SMathai I somehow got to that part of the book without having heard the line before (hadn't seen the movie) and I nearly fell out of my chair.
@colinswartz6022 11 місяців тому
Roy Batty's dying monologue at the end of Blade Runner is the perfect example of poetry from a "rough" character that completely works.
@schmetterling4477 11 місяців тому
It's also an example of an actor noticing just how godawfully poorly his character was written and switching into self-preservation mode by speaking ex-tempore. We can be glad that Rutger Hauer had the mind and guts to notice that Scott and Peoples were messing up big time. He single-handedly saves the entire movie there.
@p8gaming669 11 місяців тому
I was about to post this when I saw the rough character poetry, Roy is literally about to die and he knows it, there's a reason for him to open himself up to deckard
@schmetterling4477 11 місяців тому
@@p8gaming669 The reason is his humanity. Roy is, of course, a psychopath (that's what he was programmed to be), but he is a high functioning psychopath. He realizes that letting the man live serves him better than one more random killing.
@air6448 11 місяців тому
I haven't watched any of the movies, which blade runner are you referring to?
@schmetterling4477 11 місяців тому
@@air6448 The original: ukposts.info/have/v-deo/hp9yrqaYaK5oy4k.html
@MsLuath 25 днів тому
A dialog is not just about conflict, therefore is not just about attacking or defending. The dialogs between Marge and her husband Norm in the movie Fargo are great examples.
@sandyjasminblossomblossom4625 10 місяців тому
to be honest, I find the Aniken dialogs convincing. He IS the kind of person who has this poetic conflict in his inner soul. And he speaks out loud his exact feelings towards Padme because he wants to get a reaction. She tries to pretend, that she doesn't know what he feels. She tries to deny it. So he speaks it out loud. And in that regards, the two dialogs are in fact good ones. In my humble opinion at least! Nice videos by the way!❤
@MyWorld-eb9oz 10 місяців тому
Yeah, I mean, have you SEEN the original movies? Darth Vader is always giving his sentences bigger words, and he feels like one of those deeper meaning, types of characters, like Thanos, but not to that extent.
@_BiologyMatters_ 3 місяці тому
His name is Anakin.
@anitaflegg808 27 днів тому
When I saw the Anakin character being played by Hayden Christensen in the theatre, I felt his acting was cringey and the dialog terrible. I was rolling my eyes almost to the point of pain. But what told me that my distaste wasn't just about my advanced age was that my two kids (tweens or teens at the time), who were sitting way at the back, burst out laughing at the seriously awful kissing scene. I don't want to watch it again because it's just too painful.
@thomasbergbusch3641 4 дні тому
Anakin's words are taken almost wholesale from the cannon of Medieval romance and courtly love. A little clumsy, but following medieval poetic style
@ytreza9894 11 місяців тому
Anakin is not in love, he is obsessed, deeply disturbed and unstable, balancing between attraction and hatred, always in an absolute way. That's the subtext.
@chriscolyer2579 11 місяців тому
Would work, if Padme’s response was to be frightened or concerned. Instead she jumps right in. And that’s where it becomes totally unbelievable.
@EliasHasle 11 місяців тому
@@chriscolyer2579 She is attracted to him. And she, too, suffers from constraints imposed by the expectations of others. And while his bitter manipulation attempts are awkward, Padmé surely believes that Anakin's underlying feelings toward her are sincere. She cares about him. She may be inclined to try to save him.
@yankabolkvadze7070 8 місяців тому
This is exactly what I wanted to say.
@comealsolito804 8 місяців тому
That's not subtext, he explicitly said "I'm in agony" "I'm hunted by the kiss you should never have given me".. jeez
@bananamancoolguy7670 7 місяців тому
yeah, my first time watching that dialogue I thought it was pretty cringe like everyone else. but when you think more about it, he's not supposed to be a great communicator. he's a kid who damaged and is barely holding it together. that's kind of the point.
@ericcrone8768 Рік тому
I tend to agree with you on most points, but I can't help that, "What is man, but a miserable pile of secrets?!" is pretty much one of my favorite quotes of all time. If you take it out of context of the awful voice acting and silly inflections, this line has incredible weight to how Dracula views human beings. I don't think it's a bad translation, I think it's one of the best lines written in the thousands of video games I have played.
@ericminch 11 місяців тому
I haven't played thousands of video games, maybe only a dozen. But I have read thousands of books and plays and poems. Maybe that's why I can agree that Dracula's "What is man" dialogue sucks.
@v1kt0u5 11 місяців тому
@@ericminch Well, you suck even more not being able to see it, "Mr. thousands of books"...
@Loachie90 11 місяців тому
@@v1kt0u5 you’re being on the nose, try again
@adamgreenspan4988 11 місяців тому
I do like that line, but Richter’s lines are awful. “Die monster!” This is the start of the dialogue? That line, if you must use such a cliche, should not be anywhere other than the last thing someone says as they are striking out. It well demonstrates the problem of melodrama, because it starts at an emotional level (not counting the acting) that should require several lines to build up to.
@nemou4985 11 місяців тому
Frodo and Bilbo is not a bad dialogue at all. The video author fails to see that there IS conflict which is very obvious. Frodo is telling Bilbo that he's a selfish old man, Bilbo is recriminating him that he adopted him, neither of those things are "exposition for the audience" (there is no "Frodo adoption plot" later), rather this serves as a discussion between two characters to establish the dynamics and is rather realistic. I can't take the points seriously, besides this is well acted and not corny like anakin.
@jasonwatson1412 11 місяців тому
Great video! I’m a middle aged amateur writer with a gazillion stories in my head, many of which I think people would love to hear. The hard part is getting the words from my head to paper without losing everything that matters in the translation. Part of that loss is by making the mistakes you touched on in this video. I am frequently watching high quality film and TV, but even in those worlds I find myself spotting unnatural or otherwise flawed dialogue with alarming consistency. Anyway, just wanted to say thanks for the videos, keep ‘em coming!
@WowUsernameAvailable 10 місяців тому
If you approach Anakin's confession as something more Medieval, more formal, something a knight might have to say to the lady he loves, it makes more sense. I agree he could have just said "Why did you give me that kiss?!" and made it clear through acting that he was pained by the memory and wanted more, but still.
@GedMaheux 11 місяців тому
The whole “Get busy living or get busy dying.” Exchange from The Shawshank Redemption is one my my all-time favorite bits of dialog. So good.
@jamesmars9767 11 місяців тому
Definitely better than "you either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become a villain" from The Dark Knight, which too many people think is profound when it's really just claptrap
@TheSastoke 10 місяців тому
@@jamesmars9767ts just a line to explain the state of Gotham and how the good people of the city always end up getting corrupted, like Harvey Dent eventually did. It wasn't supposed to be deep or a "claptrap" lol
@jamesmars9767 10 місяців тому
@@TheSastoke I don't think you understand what the term means...
@TheSastoke 10 місяців тому
@@jamesmars9767 I am not a native english speaker, so I didn't before I answered your comment, but I went looking for the meaning before responding. Just because I disagree with you, it doesnt mean I cant understand what you are saying
@jamesmars9767 10 місяців тому
@@TheSastoke So, you disagree that the phrase fits the definition of claptrap?
@paddywan Рік тому
I kind of think the one with Bilbo and Frodo works because he is giving some new information. Everyone (including Frodo) always thought Bilbo did it out of kindness and empathy but now he finally reveales that it was in fact out of selfishness. It could surely be written better, but I don't think it's that bad.
@TerminalConstipation Рік тому
agreed
@AnthonyFlack Рік тому
It's certainly not an example of "as you know..." because he didn't know.
@chimangoestudios Рік тому
It sucked, learn to accept your vas taste 😊
@brookewarrington1263 Рік тому
I honestly wondered if Bilbo was so awkward saying that dialogue because he was lying. I think he feels really bad about leaving Frodo behind, so making himself less endearing to Frodo in that moment may have been his true underlying reason for saying what he did, which is why Bilbo fumbled so much and it came off like it was a bad, pre-meditated speech. The way Frodo also kind of dismisses what he says after makes me think he could see through the lie. That was always my take on it, but I honestly don't know what the true intention of that dialogue was haha.
@timrosswood4259 Рік тому
@@chimangoestudios nah it doesn't 😊
@ricardoely1144 7 місяців тому
“They fly now?” … “ThEy FLy NoW!” Chills. Instant chills. This is why 9 is the best SW film.
@1776huckleberry 7 місяців тому
This was incredibly insightful. Thank you for your help!
@leonlaviu3123 Рік тому
Once I was helping a writter to improve scenes and dialogue for soup opera and I always asked him the same "who talks like this? everyone knows the characters name, stop repeating it, over and over" and it was a nightmate, he wouldn't understand. But then it hit me. It was me that didn't understand that soap operas are written like that because they're kind of background noise, they are meant to be watched while doing something else, so it doesn't matter if you haven't really payed atention. Fuck, it doesn't even matter if you haven seen a single episode, if you watch a few episodes, even in the middle of the season, you will understand the plot, because is so expository and on the nose all the time.
@andreidragostin Рік тому
I noticed that in many kids cartoons. They keep repeating the names and every few scenes give a little rundown about what was happening.
@LindaAnderson-xz1mq 11 місяців тому
Is a soup opera like a soap opera?
@Ashfold_Eberesche 11 місяців тому
@@LindaAnderson-xz1mq No, it's much tastier.
@crackle6875 11 місяців тому
In my experience (having grown up around a lot of younger kids), it’s common for young children to OFTEN repeatedly use people’s names or titles when talking with them.
@stevenhe3462 11 місяців тому
Soap operas probably educated the last generation to speak poorly. And now, shorts platforms would probably cause the next generation to do even worse.
@markrichey 11 місяців тому
Almost anything said by Val Kilmer as Doc Holiday in Tombstone is some of the best dialog ever written. "I have not yet begun to defile myself". "The excitement was more than he could bear."
@hippie_preppy_jock 11 місяців тому
Amen! [My fight ain't with you, Holliday] "Wyatt Earp is my friend" [Hell- I got lotsa friends] " ... I don't." Chills every time
@IMAMONGUS 11 місяців тому
"I got two guns, one for each of ya"
@RebeccaTreeseed 11 місяців тому
I've watched that movie many times. The dialog is terrific. I'm your huckleberry.
@leescuderi8331 10 місяців тому
He should have won an oscar for that role
@kaylycreations Місяць тому
Yes, one of the best movies ever.
@elijaheccher3493 10 місяців тому
Well said I really appreciate how you approched this. wanting to get better isn't just about seeking people who are better than you, it's about understanding our own flaws and how we are influenced by the flaws of others. Great video keep at it. I love how you use contrast to continually push forward. looking for more; let me know if i can inspire help
@WriterBrandonMcNulty 10 місяців тому
Thanks! Tomorrow I’ll have a new bad/good video, so stay tuned
@MyWorld-eb9oz 10 місяців тому
With the *not* on the nose dialogue from to the future, that's not any more unnatural than Anakin in Star Wars. In Back to the Future, these characters are rebellious teenagers in a fun town who are all about being "chill", but in Star Wars, Anakin and Padme are high political figures in an ancient war filled with royalty, properness, and romantic settings, so in this setting, these characters would be a bit deeper, thus poetic. I mean, don't you think you'd start thinking a bit deeper if you were in the middle of a war? Are you sure you wouldn't feel a bit poetic and romantic in either of those locations where Anakin was being poetic? Just saying.
@lucasholmberg5708 Рік тому
A lot of these examples and reasons why they are good/bad are very subjective, I personaly think your example of a "as you know Bob" moment from LOTR is a really good scene where Bilbo acrually confesses to his own selfishnes and the audience gets a deeper understanding of his maturity since it often takes a lot of self understanding and growth to actually be honest about ones own flaws,
@wandabhala8516 Рік тому
Exactly, it's all subjective
@achimdemus-holzhaeuser1233 Рік тому
Yeah, especially considering Bilbos Age. "As you know.. " is perfectly good old people speech. "As you know Bob, I have been working the factory all my life " .. "Yes Grandfather you told me .. about fifty times .. today. "
@DadCanInJapan Рік тому
Yeah, I took it as a confession. Maybe Frodo knew that, but this was the first time Bilbo said it out loud.
@RottenEmu Рік тому
It's not the selfish part that's the problem, it's the 'I took you in when your parents died' bit that's the issue.
@quickdraw6893 Рік тому
Even that wasn't really well delivered though. Especially when someone says they're selfish. It comes off kind of wooden and if anything gives the impression that they're overstating something they see in themselves, maybe airing an insecurity. Few people are actually aware of the true depth of their flaws, or if they were they'd probably be taking steps to solve them, and trying to suppress them in the meantime. Bilbo just saying it straightforward and aloud the way he did doesn't really mean much because of that. A better delivery would have been more like Frodo asking like, "I've been thinking recently, and I was wondering, why did you take me in when my parents passed?" It plays into the 'attack' side while still giving exposition, and so it comes more naturally than Bilbo rather abruptly bringing up, "Well, as you know, your parents died and I took you in, and I'm not sure why I did that."
@jordanneal576 Рік тому
Jurassic Park had some excellent dialogue. Every character felt so true to form throughout the whole film, and they do such a good job of capturing the range of each character. They get their opportunities for light hearted jabs and jokes as well as their profound thoughts. One of the most well written movies around.
@WriterBrandonMcNulty Рік тому
The original? Absolutely. The characters were so well-defined. I need to rewatch it one of these days. It's been too long
@LeMayJoseph Рік тому
Also the characters are easily recognizable from one another through just a line or two of their dialogue. Alan’s grumpy expertise, Hammond’s grandiose posturing, and Ian’s flirtatious brilliance are all recognizable separately from the characters’ costumes and faces, even by a blind moviegoer. I think that’s key to the success of that dialogue.
@ragnaroksangel Рік тому
JP1 was one of the best movies ever made.
@gavinlafleur7570 Рік тому
DUDE me and my gf just watched that yesterday for the first time ever! And I even mentioned that their conversations sound and look like they’re having a normal but intriguing talk
@gosseuffe Рік тому
It's based on a novel. Many of the conversation is from the book.
@nicwaterfill2931 8 місяців тому
At the time of this comment being shared, I am writing a story for myself and sharing online. So these videos are definitely going to help me know what to avoid and what to do when writing dialogue.
@idaknow716 20 днів тому
This was a fun video to watch. As I was watching, I recalled a story fragment that I had written during High School that I had sent to a friend. He took this fragment of a story, like just a scene in a movie and wrote an entire story, where the character I had written was on the run and turns into both a fish out of water story, and a 'significant leap in technology' appears as magic to the characters he encounters.. The cliche "Take me to your leader" was one line that I had to scrub along with many other 'bubble-gum' like phrases. Thank you for having a fun video with the examples you utilized.. Bravo.
@quintonbailey9861 Рік тому
To be fair to Star Wars, Anakin was supposed to be a weird kid, with fear and emotion literally driving his character arc to the dark side
@TheOmegaXicor 11 місяців тому
to be fair to the audience, writers were supposed to be able to write weird emotional kids better than that...
@devonportfilmclubdvfc3469 11 місяців тому
And it sounds like a soap opera because George thought of it (and called it) a 'Space Opera'. Take the movie for what it is, not what you want it to be. He was aiming for the Flash Gordon of the 1930s serials but everyone was interpreting and comparing it to The Empire Strikes Back. Which is not at all what he was aiming for in the prequels.
@Grigeral 11 місяців тому
@@TheOmegaXicor Let's stop pretending Vader was anything 'other' than a spoiled brat who had no control over his emotions? Hayden Christensen played the part perfectly. People always act like he was totally out of character for him as if he didn't literally choke people to death 'just' for delivering bad news...
@siouxm2117 11 місяців тому
@Grigarel yep, but no matter how much I tell myself that is why the part was written like that, and why they cast that actor, still some acting is just so bad you cant blame the writing and if you cant recast you should cut your losses and the scene. Those words should have worked to show Anakin is very very subjective- no understanding of wider picture or princesses responsibilities...
@pacomonje 11 місяців тому
I was about to say that. I don't like the scenes on attack of the clones but I think the dialogues are ok onthe scene with Padme... Anakin actually has an underlying problem, he is struggling with the feelings he is having for Padme and the responsability to become a great Jedi. So he is trying to describe very clearly what he feels. The scene is really not good, the intention of it is amazing. Padme´s outfit doesn help so much either, hehe....
@Jones4Leather Рік тому
The Firefly series is an unusual example of using poetic language all over the place and making it work as the vernacular of most characters.
@satyrosphilbrucato9140 11 місяців тому
Exactly. That's just it, though - it DOES fit the setting and those characters because it IS the way folks speak in that 'verse. (See also, Deadwood.)
@OsellaSquadraCorse 11 місяців тому
@@satyrosphilbrucato9140 And in the same vein as Deadwood; Justified.
@edun4513 10 місяців тому
A character like Gandalf is also one who uses poetry a lot, but it makes sense for him to do so cause hes supposed to be wise and a mentor to the fellowship. The problem with poetic dialogue is when a character who isn’t poetic randomly spouts something overly poetic in an unnatural way
@NadiaSeesIt 9 місяців тому
"AH - curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!"
@MrHws5mp Місяць тому
Great example. It works because they come out with it naturally, as if it's just the way they talk on autopilot, and unless it's an outright joke, the reaction from other characters is low-key, as if they'd heard the phrase before. The camera doesn't stop or linger when someone's delivering a zinger either, it just keeps on tracking and you have to paying attention to pick up the dialogue. Favorites: "My days of not takin' you seriously are surely comin' to a middle." "We are out her at the corner of 'no' and 'where'". "Man walks down the street in a hat like that, people know he isn't afraid of anything."
@HOUSTOIN 7 місяців тому
we all know you just wanted to put that john wick scene in there. Legend
@thywordistruth2720 7 місяців тому
Some good points here, though each character will be different. Socially awkward characters will sound unnatural or stilted, and characters who are overly nervous or sensitive will have melodramatic moments, etc. The main thing to keep in mind is if it makes sense for the character in that given moment.
@CoryBlissitte Рік тому
One of my favorite examples of flowery poetic language from a gruff character is Gimli in the Fellowship of the Ring in which Legolas asks what gift he asked Galadriel for. Not only does he reply to Legolas that "I have taken my worst wound at this parting, having looked my last upon that which is fairest. Henceforth I will call nothing fair unless it be her gift to me." , but he tells Galadriel, when asked what gift that they could give to him, "To look upon the lady of the Galadhrim one last time, for she is more fair than all the jewels beneath the earth." Throughout the remainder of the movie(s) (and the books) he is crass, grumpy, sarcastic, and boastful, but very seldom wistful like this instance.
@Csizzorhandz Рік тому
Yeah it’s unfortunate how Jackson used Gimli as comedic relief when he was no less poetic and graceful as any other character in the books.
@CoryBlissitte Рік тому
@@Csizzorhandz I also lament not showing either the glittering caves or the beauty of Mirkwood parts of their friendship. A multi-millennia gap in Elf-Dwarf relations is ended and it is not even really explored beyond "How about next to a friend"?
@le_fancy_squid Рік тому
This is also such a good example because Gimli compares the beauty of Galadriel to jewels, something that a dwarf would find beautiful. It keeps him in character, and shows exactly how beautiful he found her, more beautiful than the most beautiful thing a dwarf could ever find.
@Football__Junkie Рік тому
The best Hound dialogue was the chicken scene. I don’t know who came up with that stuff but it was gold! “You gonna die for some chickens?” Hound: “Someone is.”
@dantefromdevilmaycry9857 11 місяців тому
I love that one... I call it the "Chicken Joy Commercial"
@DanielValentin6370 7 місяців тому
Just subbed and your already helping me with ideas for my short horror film ideas
@rodrigogaliciainfante2826 Місяць тому
“It endures in the name of your mother” Uffff that line was pure fire
@GweiTheLeafChild Рік тому
Note, this is what's considered good dialogue in Western style writing, which is predicated on conflict. Japanese dialogue aims to convey aesthetics of characters, hence why anime often has lots of back and forth commentary of what characters think of each other's values. It is not particularly bad dialogue.
@SaveThePurpleRhino 11 місяців тому
Japan is not only anime you know. Example of Kurosawa's dialogue is quite aesthetic yet restrained enough unlike most anime.
@GweiTheLeafChild 11 місяців тому
@@SaveThePurpleRhino not saying it was.
@Xeppeling 11 місяців тому
Yeah that was the main thing that stood out to me as being weird. Good dialogue has purpose. Good storytelling has purpose. Sometimes that purpose is conflict. Other times it’s aesthetic. It can be all sorts of things. But it all should have purpose in the end. That’s the bottomline there
@andrewstambaugh240 11 місяців тому
Indeed. Current American media seems always on rushed agenda. (Make this scene convey 8 things at once, and do it in 6 seconds). If you look at older writing that holds it weight in the modern era, it does not feel the need to do this unless it's appropriate. Jane Austen: You can't properly convey the jarring discomfort of the social faux-pa in Emma, without a proper buildup of the expectation of their enjoying a sublime leisure day trip, the friendships being lived out in time spent together. So when years of friendship are so roughly despised and Emma's cold heartedness revealed, the weight is palpable. You feel and care about the people - *because you were a part as you watched the group bond and come close.* Watching those same people look away uncomfortably then find excuses to wonder off and distance is an almost painful contrast to having watched them draw close. Most movie adaptations of Emma are far too rushed to do this scene well. It is with ease that I can recommend the 2 part BBC version over the others, as unlike the others, this *stands out as not feeling rushed and very much at home with dwelling in moments.*
@julmye Рік тому
A great line from John Wick is the simple ‘Oh’ people drop when they hear his name. It builds up the character, makes you want to know more and keeps you engaged, says that he is not to be messed with and is a good laugh, all in one word which isn’t even a word ! Also I have to shoot out about Jacques Prévert, a wonderful French poet who wrote a few movies and was a master at having real people being poetic all the time while always being or feeling real. Unbelievable stuff. (He penned the iconic « T’as d’beaux yeux, tu sais. » Finally, perhaps the best line in all movie history is probably (SPOILER FOR E.T. !!!) this final ‘ouch’.
@elliotcohen6652 11 місяців тому
Like when Viggo asks Aurelio why he hit his son. "Because he stole John Wick's car and killed his dog." The response - "Oh" - tells you everything you need to know. In that instant, Viggo knows his life and plans and legacy are doomed and there's absolutely nothing he can do about it. Brilliant dialogue.
@genosera777 10 місяців тому
found your channel by chance, that tips and advise makes me want to starts writting again. thanks
@jennynguyen-lam5633 3 місяці тому
Great video! Clear concise and very well thought out. Thank you so much!
@azietheone Рік тому
"All your base are belong to us." The most epic translated dialogue in history. 10/10
@Ashfold_Eberesche 11 місяців тому
How are you gentlemen?
@PoochieCollins 11 місяців тому
@@Ashfold_Eberesche I'm good, thank you. Now I should inform you that you have no chance to survive, make your time. Ha. Ha. Ha.
@ILikeMyPrivacytbt 11 місяців тому
Don't forget "this guy are sick"
@seanwickham8905 11 місяців тому
"The truck have started to move."
@MarcusHCrawford 11 місяців тому
Surrender now or be made dead.
@markmarkel5120 Рік тому
New writer, never looked at Dialogue that way. This what makes a story special. The characters conversation flow better. Like the emotion is not earned. Angry or passionate out bursts.
@WriterBrandonMcNulty Рік тому
Thanks for watching!
@seigeengine Рік тому
It's important to ask yourself why the audience should care about anything you're presenting them. For example, if I don't care about a character, I don't care about them being mad. I don't care about why they're mad. That doesn't mean they shouldn't be mad, but you need to be aware that the audience isn't going to care about that character yet, and not be expecting them to.
@janetsanders5356 3 дні тому
A place for both hidden and unhidden dialogue. I'm particularly impressed by unspoken "dialogue"
@venalleader2909 7 місяців тому
I know this is an old video but, as a non-writer, I want to thank Mr. McNulty for the best piece of advice I've ever had to improve my writing. I would know that in a scene that certain information passes from Character A to Character B via dialogue, but everything I wrote was just poorly done. The simple "Attack/Defend" point what was I needed to hear (with examples) and suddenly everything just fell into place, resulting in a much much better story. THANK YOU!
@detectivesanto2953 Рік тому
As a beginner wannabe writer that I am, I just wanted to say that I learned a LOT
@WriterBrandonMcNulty Рік тому
Thrilled it helped! Thanks for watching
@thyst7014 Рік тому
hmm is it just me or should the first "a" there be a "the"?
@laranjapera8825 11 місяців тому
I personally think that the sand monologue is just Anakin being an awkward teenager
@AlbionArg 19 днів тому
This was so instructive! Thank you for the insight!
@LottieCooper 11 місяців тому
Love this ! I would love to see more of these! Have you made any more videos like this one Brandon?
@WriterBrandonMcNulty 11 місяців тому
Yep, two more Bad/Good Dialogue ones: ukposts.info/have/v-deo/eadljKVnaoWn2YE.html ukposts.info/have/v-deo/ipx7dqmfsZ17kqs.html
@wolf1066 11 місяців тому
My two favourite bits of exposition where they skirted the "as you know" skilfully are: 1) the scene in _Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels_ where Winston gives Charles a hard time about not using the cage, in which he basically infodumps the whole operation for the benefit of the audience - and sets up a major plot point - but does so in a way that sounds like a natural "bollocking" (and we learn a lot about three of the four characters in that scene) and 2) the scene in _The Expanse_ where someone unwisely explains to Chrisjen Avasarala, of all people, that due to the distance involved and the speed of light, the data is delayed by about 20 minutes and she snaps "I know how the fucking thing works!" In both cases, all people involved knew the information that was being imparted, but the dialogue and delivery conveyed it in a way that still made the exchanges seem plausible and in keeping with the characters involved.
@lenon3579ify 11 місяців тому
That Avasarala interaction is really great. And it feels natural, it's just someone talking platitudes casually, as human beings often do, but with a very human reaction to it. I can almost see that exchange happening in an actual government + military meeting in a moment of crysis.
@wolf1066 11 місяців тому
@@lenon3579ify Yeah. I can think of a number of legitimate reasons why he might say that - ranging from genuine ignorance of how much Avasarala was aware through buying himself time to compose himself to being a condescending shit - so it doesn't come across as an "as you know" moment.
@cosmicspacething3474 Рік тому
Melodrama can be done good if it’s a flash forward, and throughout the story you start to understand why and how it gets to that point.
@WriterBrandonMcNulty Рік тому
Yep, if such a scene raises the right questions, it can pull an audience along
@KasumiRINA Рік тому
People should really broaden their horizons and read at least Brontes or Byron if they are too cool for good ole Willie. By this video's definition Hamlet is the worst thing ever written, *stabs Polonius*... Polonius: "Oh I am slain". No fucking shit, you drama queen! xD Jokes aside, seriously, people should read classic literature. Back to the Future and Dark Knight as examples of literary perfection in writing, really? What next, the immortal monologues of Ninja Turtles? The deep philosophical ramifications of Karate Kid? COME ON!!! :3
@katierasburn9571 Рік тому
@@KasumiRINA i started reading some classics, only a couple, but my god did they know prose... i suppose thats why these few authors are still standing after all this time
@ondrej_hrdina Рік тому
@@KasumiRINA Shakespeare is great because it is obvious he is a giant on whose shoulders stand the writers that come after. His works are taught and analyzed ad infinitum and their significance is widely recognized. But if someone found a lost work of Shakespeare and published it now under their name, thinking they would join him as one of the greats, I suspect no one would find the work good or even engaging. A few people would read it and commend the Shakesperean inspiration. That would be it.
@abdulkarimelnaas7595 Рік тому
@@KasumiRINAThat's like telling a modern gunsmith to study flint knapping to improve the new railgun design that they've been struggling with. Things evolve and the old ways, although we owe them a great deal, become obsolete. It's crazy to imply that the handful of famous classical authors somehow were so genius that they've not been improved upon by the tens of thousands of predecessors over the centuries. On top of that, so much has already been based on these authors works that all their ideas now seem cliche. If you must dig through history, at least look for stories that aren't well known and don't constitute the base scaffolding of the modern storytelling landscape.
@puppystatus 10 місяців тому
11:50 as soon as you said gruff and nasty i thought of the Hound and his lessons to Arya, then boom he's your example! Love it haha. Great vid
@michaelstrauss6587 7 місяців тому
My fav example of bad dialogue: "Listen, we should keep searching for the others." Rewrite: "Back to work, bitch."
@Alcagaur1 11 місяців тому
The melodrama point about exclamation was covered by Terry Pratchett in "Eric" - “Multiple exclamation marks,' he went on, shaking his head, 'are a sure sign of a diseased mind.”
@1minion203 11 місяців тому
GNU Sir Terry
@Alcagaur1 11 місяців тому
@@1minion203 Can't stop the signal, Mal.
@1minion203 11 місяців тому
@@Alcagaur1 also a good line. Firefly/Serenity was full of them
@alicewandermeer998 11 місяців тому
The fireplace scene is about young and sheltered (Jedi were NOT GOOD in teaching how to interact with emotions) Anakin trying to verbalize his feelings to the very person he loved. Of course he is being on the nose and awkward... What were you expecting? The problem with the scene was not the text but the disconnect between it and acting.
@aix83 10 місяців тому
Yes, the objection is to Anakin not being a westernly cool male type
@LordSluggo 10 місяців тому
Hayden portrayed a conflicted, awkward teenager exactly like a conflicted, awkward teenager and the world excoriated him for it
@UncleFexxer 10 місяців тому
Actually, I think the main problem with the scene is that Hayded was such a shi++y actor throughout the entirety of the prequels.
@Hexensohn 10 місяців тому
@@LordSluggohe portrayed a conflicted, awkward teenager like a wooden actor.
@edun4513 10 місяців тому
No, the problem with it is not necessarily that he is awkward in his words, its that its not meant to be. The writers clearly meant this scene as them falling in love, but if he spouts off like that, theres no way an older, smarter, and more attractive woman like Padme would fall for him, and the fact that it works feels, you guessed it, unnatural. Weird dialogue only works if the other characters respond to it like its weird, the prequels never do this and thats why the prequels are generally shit
@emmanuellaeledu 3 місяці тому
Incredible advice as always, Sir!
@mackoverseer3639 5 днів тому
Melodrama = Emotion that is not earned. That's a wonderful definition! Thanks 🙂
@ordinarylittlebastard3248 Рік тому
Basically, unless you have a medieval theme story, all you need to do is make dialogue sound natural.
@WriterBrandonMcNulty Рік тому
That helps, but there's a sweet spot when it comes to sounding natural. If your characters sound "too natural" the dialogue actually suffers.
@kingbeauregard Рік тому
@@WriterBrandonMcNulty Dialogue ultimately has to be in service to advancing the story, but it shouldn't be obviously so.
@kingbeauregard Рік тому
@@WriterBrandonMcNulty Dialogue ultimately has to be in service to advancing the story, but it shouldn't be obviously so.
@seigeengine Рік тому
The function of dialogue in a story is to serve the ends of the story. Sounding natural is an often desirable but ultimately secondary concern.
@ncsmith1952 Рік тому
"All..."
@jesse_cole Рік тому
Hayden Christiansen when he finds a genie in a lamp: “I wish I could just wish away my feelings.” Genie: “Your wish is granted.” Hayden: “I don’t feel any different.” Genie: “You wished to make a wish. You’re free to do that now.” Hayden: “OK. I wish my feelings would go away.... ....I still don’t feel any different.” Genie: “Sorry, you used up your wish on the ability to wish. If you wanted your feelings to go away, you should have led with the second one.”
@Palocles 11 місяців тому
The double verb dialogue was so cringe. Hard to believe it was in a Hollywood blockbuster.
@erikpetersen-chinguacousys1943 Місяць тому
You CANNOT discount the effects of acting. Incredible acting can take mediocre (or worse) dialogue and make it great; bad acting can utterly destroy a beautifully written piece of dialogue. Acting matters!
@drawdownwind6636 11 місяців тому
Happy to have stumbled upon your channel // Great work, my friend!!
@WriterBrandonMcNulty 11 місяців тому
Thrilled to hear it!
@RGP43_ Рік тому
The lord of the rings dialogue is actually really good and reflects bilbo and the context and events that happened and are about to happen
@Arcanelake98 11 місяців тому
Resident Evil’s dialogue and voice acting is freaking amazing. Never change it. 😂
@Barry.Hughes 11 місяців тому
No, it is godawful and everyone involved is embarrassing to behold. Never change it. 😂
@80PercentAshamedOfU 9 місяців тому
@@Barry.Hughes Games: Good; Movies: Bad
@Barry.Hughes 9 місяців тому
@@80PercentAshamedOfU the movies weren't bad, they just weren't Resident Evil, unless you mean the most recent two that were released together in Dec 2021, in which case they were Resident Evil and they were bad...so very bad...maybe if they had focused on making one movie instead of two it would have been great, and Resident Evil, but they didn't and it wasn't...
@erikthered7422 27 днів тому
This is gold. I've love to her your take on the writing of Alien 3.
@spacehamsterZH 11 місяців тому
It's not from a movie, but my favorite line of bad dialogue is from the House of the Dead arcade game, when your protagonist picks up a security card, holds it up to the camera so that you can see it says SECURITY CARD and then says, as if he's just figured out who killed Kennedy, "This must be the security card!"
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