My favorite of Gary's one liners - "I went to a friend's funeral yesterday. The poor bastard drowned. All of us mates of his got him a wreath in the shape of a life preserver ... Well, it's what he would've wanted".

People need to remember, offensive jokes are meant to do that. They are not the views of the comedian telling them. We need more people like Gary.

I love the way he sometimes doesn’t finish the joke as he’s laughing too much

Everybody was complaining about Garys jokes so for him to tell them again is pretty brave well done Gary

We need more Gary's in the world...love it. 🤣🤣🤣👍🏻

He has perfect voice to these "offensive" jokes. And the fackt that the mount of his material is just enormous is unbelieveble! Absolutely brilliant stuff.

The "I pulled a sickie" took a while to sink in but when it dawned on me I almost broke wind I laughed so much :-)

It's nothing more than humor. I found these to be brilliant!!

Why would anyone go to a gig knowing that they might be offended? Keep up the good work Gary

Superb. Genuine comedy. Loved every minute of it.

Gary we saw you in Aberdeen about 5 years ago. You were absolutely brilliant you talked to us after the show and you was a gentleman 👍🏻👍🏻

One of my friends lost his son and on the _day_ of that tragedy, he turned up for tennis, explaining it was either that or stay at home and cry. He chose to take his mind off the misery, doing something he loved. Afterwards, some of the players (unaware of the event) were telling jokes. My friend started laughing and for those precious few minutes, he was able to get away from the nightmare of what he'd suffered, thanks to comedy. It was therapeutic and enabled him to get through a difficult period that most of us can't even contemplate. Humour isn't ever offensive, unless you _choose_ to be offended. If this friend could be cheered up by humour, 12 hours after being given the worst news possible, then we all can. Personally, I'd support a law that jailed anyone complaining about jokes. In this dysfunctional and miserable world, we need more ironic and "offensive" jokes, not less. Those who would say otherwise are enemies of happiness and don't belong in normal society. When I was at Gramnar school, in the 60s, we mercilessly lampooned each other. This is where and how, we learnt our debating and riposte skills. Nowadays, kids are so insulated from everything that they have no ability to reply to any remark. We're breeding an entire generation that is unequipped to respond to anything. All thanks to the miserable and sanctimonious "degenerate puritans" (sic) who tout themselves as the arbiters of good taste.

this is the most I`ve physically laughed at a comedian in years...thank you

Fisting a ventriloquist! Haahaha made me laugh right out of the gate

Bloody brilliant!, we need more jokes like this in the world!!.

Great stuff. Love these one-liners.

He was one of the funnier parts of Mock the Week when he was a regular.

He's exactly right to do this. When I was a child my grandmother used to remind my sister and I to say "Please"and "Thank you" etc. She was very prim and proper. One day my uncle walked into the sitting room while she was knitting and tore off a thunderous fart. She looked up and prompted him "I beg your pardon" he replied "Oh, sorry. Didn't you hear it the first time?' and did it again. I got a smack for laughing.

Your laugh between jokes...... priceless!😂😂😂😂😂

Brutal and absolutely hilarious 😂

some of those jokes were savage and i loved 'em

The "dont forget poo bags" one gets me every time😂😂😂😂

Priceless!

Absolutely brilliant

i hope there will always be comedians who are willing to do accept whatever criticism they may get in order to make the rest of us laugh. Keep it up brother.

Phenomenal as always

Excellent as always

That's the funniest thing I've seen in a while🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I'm a THIN, American Man, and for the last bunch of years, I've been watching ALL SORTS of stand up shows from Jimmy Carr, Sarah Millican, Mock the Week, stand up show's in the UK Apollo, and now I found YOURS!! Your jokes would TOTALLY offend an average American, but I've never been accused of being average, more.... abnormal then anything really! LOL I just wanted to say, KEEP THE JOKES COMING Mr. Delaney, YOUR AWESOME!!!

100% top comic keep it up Gary 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣👍👍

Absolute quality Mr D 😂😂😂

l've known about this cat for just a few days and l'm smitten with him. l'm not sure what i'm more gobsmacked by... the brilliantly tasteless jokes or his wonderful, amazed laughter between them! l came ohm an hour ago, in a shite mood, and NOW l FEEL GREAT! The beer and the cookie and the gin and the smokes account for mebbe 47.38571% of that. Dave who?

My favourite stand up !

Absolutely love dark jokes but this took it too far - into the absolutely fucking hilarious territory 🤣

Sitting on a plastic raft in Stanmore Bay NZ. I lived in a beach house for around 3-4 months aged 20 in 2013. Wow I miss them days. Listening to this song brings that memory back.

The dolphin one at 6.15 ish had me thinking for a few seconds....then I spat my drink out!! 🤣

Brutally wonderful.

Him and Tim Vine are my favourite characters for one liners

I could watch this for days..

Shouldn’t that be called ‘Behead and Shoulders’

I’m supposed to be going to sleep for work but I’m creased at this 🤣🤣🤣

I want to get intouch with Gary just to thank him for making me laugh

Thank god some people still have a sense of humour, brilliant

Gary is fucking brutal. Love him ❤

I love comedians who laugh at their own jokes.

Just seen him tonight at a sell out show in Lancaster.....howling!🤣🤣🤣

The Emo joke is my favourite.

He’s having so much fun.

I've only heard Gary on Mock the Week. This was so refreshing as I love offensive jokes and a bit of swearing!

Mountbatten had dandruff .... They found his head n shoulders on the beach 😅😅

He is truly evil love it 😂👍

Excellent work

Fukin brilliant made me laugh out loud a lot

Free speech at its finest!

Gary, these are brilliant observations of like.

These are fantastic

Defo mixed one liners there 😂 Didn't know if I was knob for laughing a certain one's 🤷‍♂️

There's always that joke when you say "OH, oh jesus, yup that's the one that got me!"

I like it a lot...Gary is GREAT

Bin Laden was on the show Ready Steady Cook,,he made a Big Apple Crumble.

Pure class.

Love it!!

So good. So very good.

Absolute superb comedian and everyone needs to remember it’s really just word play

These are amazing

🤣🤣🤣 Paul's laughing at the end

The pedo in a florist had me creasing

Would love to see Gary Lineker's reaction to this performance.

Waving her bucket 🤣🤣

The only reason I'm complaining about this is because I want to hear more of them.

Quality!!!

Gifted funny smart comedian

The Jimmy carr of wish laugh got me the most 😂

Brilliant stuff

Some real gems in there

Absolute genius.

Bloody Brilliant 🤣

Keep up the jokes lov them

Awesome! 🤘🎸😎

Absolutely brilliant!! Doesn’t give a fuck, just how comedians should be I think

Saw this guy several years ago. Very funny.

Nice to see gary.

I love this guy.

Amazing stuff

"Shoulders" lol

Absolutely fucking awesome 🤣🤣🤣👍

Keep telling them 👌

I must try some of these at a gig I'm doing in my aunt's care home. They'll be falling out their wheelchairs..

Brilliant

Love it

Don’t know how you think of them but keep them coming 👏🤣👍

Excellent

This is on the edge but this guy’s funny 👏🤣

You'd never hear these on Mock the Week! :'D

Funny fella....didn't know James wade did comedy aswell as darts...

Awesome!!! :)

I wish to complain! Nearly broke my ribs laughing.

I am offended by the warning... job well done, sir! 😛

cheered me up more than i thought child death would

I think Gary is brilliant. It`s a joke, the only people who get offended are those who want to be offended. I visualize all his jokes and that is what his humour is all about. He`s a top comedian. I can`t wait to see him. Gary keep being yourself !!