My limited edition clothing line drop: padilla.store/

just a personal observation, in some episodes it takes awhile for guests to warm up and start getting into the conversation but you can tell these guys are professionals. the way they’re speaking to anthony, they sound like they’ve known him for years.

One time I was having a really bad flashback from having CPTSD and my boss did nothing but listen, validate my concerns, and take action on what I said. He didn't interrupt, he simply sympathized with me. It was one of the most kind, gentle, yet most powerful things I've ever experienced in my life.

I love how Anthony doesn’t just spend days with people such as youtubers and such, but also people that are out there saving lives and creating positive impacts within the community in other ways. Thank you Anthony!

The fact that Anthony doesn't only interview famous people like twitch streamers, and youtubers, but people who help others and save lives is amazing. He brings light to all those people who help others in so many, life-changing ways. Anthony, if you see this, you're amazing.

My city needs more officers like this. Those “most stressful situations” sounds like great police work. Make a connection or find someone with a connection so no one or less get hurt

When Joe made Anthony talk about Mykie he got so happy and he noticed it 😂

Imagine being the kid in that situation. Being a hostage. Like. You can't comprehend what's going on. You just know innately it's wrong. Damn.

Dang, that young boy at the bridge... When he explained how school was overwhelming and how snot was coming down that far, it kinda hit me. I've never been that suicidal before, but i do cry in school from time to time because its overwhelming... Just hesring that made me tear up a bit

One of my friends has accused me of being too understanding. I love listening to people, I find it so fascinating how people think. However, she has made the point that me wanting to hear all about her and others has made me lose sight of myself and that I have no real opinions. Im great at deescalating and empathizing but I have nothing to stand for, besides compassion. Im not too sure if thats a good or a bad thing

Small critique: love your videos! But always so curious how people get into these professions and what they had to do to become what they are. I’d love if during the profession videos if you add that

Just three minutes in and it is so true what the first interviewee said, "people love to be listened to." I have social anxiety that used to be severe and my mom was so smart to tell me "just ask people about themselves. people LOVE to talk about themselves." It gets the person on your side, they remember how you made them feel. Apparently works even in the most high tension, high stakes situations! Thanks, Mom!

just listening to these guys talking made me calm down. considering how hard it is for me to calm down even a little bit - that's some insane skill. they also remind me of my grandpa. he was always talking in this pattern. always slow, calm, and always listening. not even mentioning what their jobs are like. my anxiety could never. i would overthink everything i say and how i say it. truly awesome people

As a parent of a preteen with suicidal tendencies this episode has helped me immensely... As a 30 year old who didn't grow up with Trans even being a thing we knew about. I struggled enough being Bi, but I still struggle to know how to help my Trans preteen. This video has helped me learned betters skills for if I ever have to try and talk them out of self harm again. 😭

This episode was pure therapy for me, these guys are the real deal and I hope this episode brings the same feeling of security that this has for me.

it hurts me, deeply, to think that there are people who have to create a hostage situation or stand up on the ledge of a bridge in order for someone to talk to them and LISTEN. I'm sitting here thinking how much I need that - someone with the time to just sit with me and talk to me and listen to me and offer that olive branch of "i understand, you're not alone, this doesn't have to be how you ruin/end your life". EDIT: thank you to all the kind comments ;-; you're all awesome and i hope the people in your lives value that awesomeness.

this is INSANELY cool. I hadn't remembered jobs like this exist, but it feels so *right* for me. The skills they discussed are the parts of me that I've developed the most. Being curious about people, knowing how to really listen and make that connection, knowing what questions to ask to get a little deeper into who someone is, staying calm so I make people around me as comfortable as possible, being 110% engaged in the moment with the other person. I feel like I'm thriving the most when I'm using those skills to make a difference. I feel like I was made to do this. I'd just need to take an honest look at whether I'm willing to put myself in such intense physical peril. At some level, I feel like if you're gonna do that job, you gotta accept the possibility of being in the line of fire. Maybe I wait until I'm a bit older before I decide whether I can commit to that.

I owe negotiators my dad's life. He struggled with BPD and attempted to un-alive himself multiple times, but on one instance he became delirious after overdosing and ended up pulling his gun on us when we broke his door down to get to him. We refused to let police in our house with guns, and they compromised with some kind of 'sand bag' gun that was able to knock the gun out of his hand. Due to the understanding and empathy of negotiators, I got another two years with my dad before he finally succeeded in taking his own life. My dad struggled, and they understood that. Thank you to everyone that does this job.

Hostage negotiators are amazing people. Thanks for showing us this video, Anthony

I'd be terrible at this, I'm autistic and I can't do conversations at all, small talk is hell. Props to them :)

We are emotional beings, and our emotions drive us. I feel that hostage negotiators don't negotiate terms, but instead negotiate emotions. Any kind of hostage situation is emotionally charged, so how do you temper that? Well, you speak to their emotions in such a way that reduces the emotional state that got them into the situation. You become empathetic, but also want to draw them to the opposite of the emotional state they had to begin with. You're the mediator of their emotions. The amount of patience, emotional balance, and presence of mind to talk logically through such high pressured situations is probably a combination that very few people could muster and handle.

I am a volunteer with a Crisis Textline. I can say from personal experience how fulfilling of an experience it is. You really learn a lot about yourself and about others, as well as the impact that being there to listen can have on a life. Highly recommend anyone interested applies to volunteer.

I'm a psychologist, and active listening is a key in my field of work as well. Watching these people demonstrate their skills in a short period of time was just fascinating!

I love how the intro is literally him promoting his clothing brand and then it goes straight to talking about self-harm

This video made me incredibly emotional, I'm out of highschool and lost thinking about my future and I think I know what I wanna do now

Please do I spent a day with native Americans!!! I'm indigenous, and it's really hard to find any type of proper, respectful representation for us. I think that you'd be able to approach the topic with the sensitivity and love that it needs!

My partner uses these techniques on me when I’m having a panic attack. 💀 After years of “I understand how you feel,” and “everything will be ok!”, I never thought anyone could break through my mental spirals. Until one day I’m on the phone with my partner and I start having a panic attack. They almost naturally kicked into negotiations. De-escalation time. Instantly I hear, “I’m not sure what got you feeling so upset, but I wanna help you find a solution that actually helps. I’m not gonna sit here and say it’s gonna all be okay the second we’re done talking, but… I wanna know what’s going on. I’m here to listen.” Minutes later, they’ve got me talking about my favorite movies, I’m not shaking anymore, and I’m starting to calm down. It’s weird how just… having someone actively listen can impact so much. As I spoke, they brought up specific names and locations and things I mentioned.. and it felt like someone actually cared.

I found how interesting is it that they're both negotiators but one deal mostly with ppl that hold other hostaged while the other deal with suicidal victims. They're both did they best to save other life no matter how stressful the situations are. It's really amazing

I absolutely love this series Anthony I really hope you realize how important this series is exploring all different walks of life and normalizing such stigmatized groups of people and humanizing them is just amazing

As a nurse, we also use “I” statements and almost hostage like tactics for patients in the hospital. Especially confused patients, or those who are putting their safety at danger. We are taught to use techniques like this to redirect them and get them back to safety by talking to them and exploring their feelings.

The fact that dipsea sponsors Anthony is truly a testament to how safe and respected he makes women feel

Can you do a “spend the day with private investigators?” Would love to get some insights into that field

Crisis work is super stressful & then to add other ppl’s lives into the mix, with the varied hostage situations, I really love the work they do ❤.

I swear Anthony always be introducing us to the heroes we didn't even think about before. Truly amazing people here!

10:40 “I know what if feels like to wonder where my next meal is coming from” being an important part of Suicide negotiation is so telling of the capitalist hellscape we live in

i really respect the bridge guy, he seems very respectful towards those with mental health issues, im glad he's doing that kob

I agree with Scott, I think Anthony would be a great negociator! He is one of the greatest interviewers there is, he is compassionate, he listens, he connects with every one of his guests. He's one of the few people I'd feel safe talking about myself without knowing him. That was such an interesting interview this week!

One of the hardest classes I've taken in grad school for Forensic Psychology was Clinical Interviewing. My teacher played the role of someone who was really struggling and very hostile. We started out with a good rapport but I became too focused on my questions rather than going off script because it was an exam. I normally wouldn't worry so much about the questions as the rapport with a patient is far more important, especially in an intake interview. But I got distracted by the fact that I was being graded. It was a good reminder that you have to always focus on the patient and their needs and goals, not yours. It was an incredibly informative and immersive trial-by-fire as I'll be working with people in the criminal justice system who are struggling and possibly more likely to be hostile than the average client in psychotherapy. Hostage negotiation is a massively commendable career. It's nerve-wracking and can turn on a dime. I'm quite intuitive, but it can't be overstated how easily that can go out the window when you're in a very precarious and dangerous situation and you're dealing with immense pressure and anxiety to do a good job in order to save someone's life, metaphorically or literally. So glad that these lovely people are in this role. They are great at it, and it's not easy by any means.

7:55 This one hits so hard... On Nov 2nd, 2021, my youngest cousin took his life by jumping off the Newport Pell Bridge. Our family has never been the same since. My poor Aunt and Uncle are truly broken now. My cousin was so close to graduating from Brown University as a doctor. We all had no idea he was so depressed. His nickname since he was a toddler was "happy" followed by his first name (which I will omit). If anybody is reading this message, please remember to check in with your loved ones, and when you ask them how they're doing, act like you TRULY care how they are doing. So many people say, "Hi, how are you doing," and it's like this automated saying whenever we see somebody. People can tell, though, when you TRULY care and are asking because of that. Life is precious, and you never know who won't be there the next day... make sure everybody you care about, know that you truly do care about them. If they are hurting, they are more likely to open up if/when they are hurting. ❤️

the way i learned that i talk like a negotiator in everyday life with friends and customers because of the household i was raised in 😂😂😅 now it makes sense why i get frustrated when other people dont know how to do active listening...

Whoever did the thumbnail did an amazing job! I love this series! Keep up the great work!

I really liked when he said that seeking out life experiences will help you in a job like this. The one thing that got me through hard times where it felt like there wasn't any reason or meaning to the suffering was knowing that it made me a more empathetic person towards people who have been through similar things.

I’ve learned more about dating from this video than anywhere else in my entire life

Anthony is the only interviewer that I trust

When I was younger this was my “dream” job because I remember seeing it on the tv and I as a child always wanted to be able to help people and just listen to them - I call it a “dream” job because the job itself isn’t happy or just non serious but now looking back at that I wouldn’t ever do the job as mentally i do not believe couldn’t handle it

negotiators are the unsung heros in many cases. Not to toot my own horn but I feel like thats a sort of job I could do well with since Im a great listener and enjoy conversations with people. But then again, the stress of knowing that one mistake can lead to someone dying, would really bring me down.

I learned about those same listening skills when I took a counseling/therapy class in college, they’re super effective

There's something about these negotiators that screams wholesome masculinity to me, I can't put it in bettet words than that but they're super cool

it seem that every cop in the US should be like this guys. wanting to save lifes instead of "catching the bad guys"

i'm so beyond grateful that you put out this video bc i might of finally figured out what i want to do with my life. helping people in need has always been a goal of mine but i didn't know how, but now, i might actually know how the way i want to do it

these people who do this are amazing and hearing how they treat the people is so heart warming especially because law enforcement and cps and things like that don’t always do much and handle things with care hearing the guy say he built and friendship with a guy who was about to kill himself and helped that guy and went out to lunch with him to check on him we need more people who care about what they do and also who put up to the risk and help others

It's always so awesome to see people with these interesting jobs in your videos. It's like really educating but also fun at the same time to see you interacting with them!

this video feels really important. i’ve always been curious and had the upmost respect for hostage negotiators, it’s incredible. i was even interested in doing that myself so it was really cool to hear about the crisis hotline too. again, so much respect for these individuals.

As someone that has been interested in this kind of stuff for a while, this is a very interesting video to watch, thank you Anthony for doing this interview, it really helped me understand what truly goes into this kind of job. :)

Scott did an amazing teaching job and roleplaying. Effing gold star!

This is an amazing video! Not only learning what these amazing people do but also learn myself how to listen and at the same time take control of the situation.

We need more people like this in the world!! Good listeners. If we had more good listeners, I don't think the world would be the way it is...

Did not know a crisis textline existed. I love the various avenues you've branched out on with spending your day Anthony. Always eye opening.

This is definitely one of my favorite interviews you have ever done, Anthony. Thank you so much for this very empathetic & educational interview!!!! 💛

Hi Anthony, this would be at a small percentage you'd read this. But I want you to know that you're one of the reasons I took up and study psychology. Thanks for widening perspectives from a lot of people

Gosh what a good episode. These men really do amazing work. They have such kind eyes and seem so very easy to talk to

I loved this video! I first found out about negotiators (besides crime shows) when I learned about Gary Noesner. He was one of the negotiators for Ruby Ridge and Waco.

I couldn’t imagine a high level stress job like these guys do

these videos have always been so powerful and you continue to go beyond that power to inform and further expand our emotional knowledge. hell yeah dude keep it up

Wow. Thank you so much with this video. I struggled all my life to connect with others, so this was the right video to help me connect more with others. This will be life changing.

If I had more mental strength this sounds like such a fulfilling important job, I’d love to be able to do this. Props to these men and everyone else who does jobs like this to save so many lives ❤

Great episode. I have a friend who went through this and was spared thanks to hostage negotiators. These guys are such heroes!

Tbh I'm having a great birthday cause of you! Your videos always inform me and others on very interesting topics and I think this is my favorite video you've made! Listen to their stories and calming voices has made this kinda stressful day a lot more tame, thanks for just being a cool dude Anthony! Thanks for the 2 day early birthday present lmao

Thanks for this video. I am an ER nurse and these communication techniques will help me so much with dealing with patients in crisis.

yasss I love your videos keep up the amazing work. Its always great when I get to watch your new videos ^-^

Really really love this episode, we need more understanding people like these hostage negotiators. Thanks Scott, Joe and also Anthony for making this world a better place

I couldn’t imagine doing this for a living. Talking past friends out of committing is far too draining for me

I loved this video I miss videos like these where you learn about different professions from the professionals perspective. It’s like a interview channel for the people, by the people, of the people

This was a fantastic episode! I feel like a lot of the skills these negotiators spoke about are so useful for anyone to have in their lives. Mad respect to these people

This job interests me a lot, especially since I consider myself highly empathic.. but I don’t think I could handle the trauma of the unavoidable bad outcomes of someone dying. I applaud those who do have the strength to deal with that.

those photos of you wearing the limited edition merch are absolutely incredible?? what an absolute model

i love the part of the video when hostage negotiators break down the psychology of persuasion

Very similar to working with students with Emotional Disabilities. Practically every day we are deescalating dangerous behaviors, though definitely not as potentially life threatening as this! Active listening is a tool you can use through your entire life, not just for careers like this!

Great episode, as always!!! I'm not in a place financially where I could support your merch drop however I just wanted to say I really love the designs and it's obvious you put a lot of hard work into the pieces. That flannel though!!!! You'll probably sell out really quick

This episode is wow....! Thank you so much for this! These negotiators are amazing!

something interesting u could ask the ppl u interview is what lead them to get into these professions? like how did they hear about it and what made them realize it was for them

i'm ngl watching this i realized i already use some of the tools they do in normal conversation. even if you aren't a hostage negotiator i highly suggest trying to implement some of the things they mention here, like obviously listening more- learning as much as you can about peoples interests, not using 'i understand' or 'i've been there' types of statements to people as much- use things like 'that's understandable' or 'i can see where you're coming from" and having things cued up (maybe saved in your phone), to distract someone or make them happy like memes or photos of animals. i feel like a lot of these things can just be implemented in day to day relationships

Wow. A LOT of your videos push me to think outside of my box, but this was one of the ones that totally change your perspective on life. Thank you team and guests for striving to make the world a better place, I think your work is awe-inspiring.

Sympathy and empathy are powerful skills💜

For an episode on the benefits of listening, this really showed how good Anthony is at asking a question and waiting for an answer patiently, without arrogant interruptions.

just wanted to say that I found this an extremely interesting episode and I love that you are doing interviews with people like this!!!

I absolutely loved this interview! this is such important work, thank you Scott and Joe for sharing your experience!

i absolutely love how calming it is to listen to both joe and scott's voices. they have such a calming tone while talking about everything in this interview. no wonder they're crisis negotiators!

This was a truly amazing interview. Fascinating info, what rare, incredible, empathetic men!

notice that even these professionals like to be listened to in an informative or personal matter or not, that just shows, listen to someone in distress, make sense of a situation and help them and that'll help you when you're in a bad situation. Just listen

scott really gave me a different insight on this and i am greatful for this, didn’t realise it took so much to talk someone out of something

so grateful for this episode, these guys have a very amazing job, i feel most people forget about them.

A lot of what these people say really speaks to me as a social worker and someone who works in crisis work. There is this weird rush and sense of calmness when trying to help someone get through a crisis. It's extremely difficult but rewarding work. 😊

When I was going through a very scary time with an x who was dangerous My kids uncle from their dads side would check in on me (we live in different states) And family would ask how the kids were but never really cared or asked how I was doing And I just now realized how much that ment to me when he asked about me n he said that I mattered and my kids loved me and needed me I txt him today saying thank u for all those times he took the time to actually reach out and make a difference n that brought me n my kids through it Thank u to all those who care or at least make an effort

So exciting when you upload videos related to this topic. Loved the kidnap, cult, and school shooting survivor videos. Keep it up!!

Your content is awesome keep it up!

Very insightful, thanks! I think a lot of these techniques would apply well to political discussion online. Listening and understanding someone's concerns, getting to the root of them before convincing can be the difference between changing someone's mind and being ignored. I feel like on an intuitive level I figured out some of the active listening and mirroring through trial and error, but to see it all pulled together and explained so well is so valuable

Thank you for sharing crisis help line text

Love love love all these videos you do, the only small bit of “advice” id give to both the negotiators or anybody. But I was told to never tell someone “I know what it’s like” the “I KNOW” part is what tends to trigger some people. A better way is to say that you understand them. But, these negotiators and you are amazing!

I checked out the Crisis Textline volunteer form, and whilst I'm not done and not sure if I'f be allowed due to my living in Europe, I really really love the fact that you need to enter your legal first name but can also enter your preferred first name