"I mean, anybody can look at you. It's quite rare to find someone who sees the same world you see." Preordered.

Am I the only one who thinks authors reading a chapter of their books out loud should be a thing?

John Green: the reason teenagers have been having existential crisis since 2005

i see a lot of people saying they relate to this too much...and i can't help but notice how lucky i am to not have thought spirals like this. i think this book will be very informative for me and may raise awareness for ocd and related disorders

So, where are the turtles? I heard that there might be turtles.

"Anybody can look at you. It's quite rare to find someone who sees the same world you see." This book shows a lot of promise!

"But I was beginning to learn that your life is a story told about you. Not one that you tell." Art. True art.

"Sometimes I wondered why she liked me, or at least tolerated me. Why any of them did. Even I found myself annoying." I'm a very talkative person. Someone who always had trouble making friends, because I'd always be the person who put more effort into the friendship. The friendships were always mostly one sided. I was closer to that person than they were to me. They were my best friend, and I was nowhere near theirs. And that thought, that quote, is one that has plagued me for the almost 11 and a half years I've been in school. That my presence, my personality, or my conversation annoyed them. That they simply pretended to be my friend out of politeness. That they only tolerated me. No matter how many times my friends have assured me that that was not the case, I've always doubted that. These are people I've known for 5 and a half years, and I still regularly think that I'm annoying to them. Thank you John for expressing that thought, that constant fear in such a straightforward way. Hopefully, other people in a similar situation will see that and relate to it (I'm sure they will). And hopefully, the people on the other side of that friendship will see this and understand why the other person (like me) is constantly so worried about that statement being true. Thank you.

"...anybody can look at you, its quite rare to find someone who sees the same world you see"

John, i am actually crying now. As someone who has suffered with OCD for all of my young adult life, it touches me to hear it all explained in the way you have written it. I am so grateful for this, and I honestly cannot wait until October 10th

When are you ever going to narrate your own audiobook? I could listen to your voice all day.

I have OCD and this is the first thing I've heard that accurately describes it.

On episode 45 of Dear Hank and John you said that you new novel would be composed entirely of emojis. How dare you lie to us.

Sometimes I actually believe I'm a character in a book. Not the star, just an extra. Just there.

This is awesome. Really raw and a little uncomfortable and REAL. I have OCD and generalised anxiety, and I'm really lucky to be on medications that are helping me to function through and come out of my thought spirals. But I still have them, and I remember having to live with them constantly under my skin, right in the corner of my eye, itching at me in the worst way to the point that it felt like thinking about these unsettling itching thoughts was my entire existence. All while I'm trying to listen to people, or have a conversation, or do my chores, or even put on my shoes. And it's so hard to explain to people why it's hard and why you can't stop thinking about it and that no this is not the same as wanting things to be symmetrical or tidy. So thank you! This is a really real representation of what anxiety/OCD can feel like, and I'm grateful to be represented. Looking forward to reading your book!

Your last book, which was about a sixteen-year-old girl, I read when I was eleven and now your new book, which is about a sixteen-year-old girl, I'm going to read when I'm sixteen. So basically, this is going to be a girl the same age as Hazel and written by the same author as Hazel, but she's probably going to seem younger to me (sixteen sounds a whole lot closer to adulthood when you're 11). Interesting.

"My boobs sweat" -John Green, (2017) Edit: To say that I loved the chapter would be an understatement, because this, put simply, was refreshing. It somehow seemed perfectly natural that John was narrating the story until he read the aforementioned line and I snapped back to the reality that the protagonist is Aza, not John.

Well call me turtle, because I'm all the way down for this. (I love this, John. I'm a neuroscientist and have only come to know OCD through the stories of others and the less verbose microscope. Thank you so much for opening another invaluable window/insight into it! Best wishes from a long-time nerdfighter :))

How can anyone dislike this? This was a beautiful way to start off my day. Thank you John :)

Anyone else listening to this after reading the book?

I always found it comforting that your body, is your body plus pounds worth of bacteria. It's like you are a mini ecosystem.

This is my first John Green book cycle as a Nerdifghter, and I am extremely excited.

It's very deep. I keep finding my self trying to get out of ya novels but then john makes another gold mine and then I feel like I'm in a comfy home surrounded by warm fuzzy things and I really don't want to leave.

"you think you're the painter, but you're the canvas" preordered tatwd the second i was able to, and this just makes me a million times more excited for october 10th! forget halloween, this'll be the highlight of my october!

"It's quite rare to find someone that sees the same world you see." I love this. John Green your mind is beautiful.

"Life is a story told about you, not one that you tell." Wow, that was really deep for the first page.

First thought upon hearing the ending: "I see Wolf in White Van got to you, too." First thought early on: "He really nailed the lack of agency that you feel when you're in a US public high school."

“I was somebody’s something” That sentence is just amazing!

"Thought spiral" is such a perfect way to describe it

I came for turtles. I stayed for gut bacteria. In all seriousness, though, this is an incredible first chapter and I am so excited to read it.

I feel like I would pay for John Green himself to read his entire book to me. LOL

I love this, John. Not just because you write in such a beautiful, yet relatable manner. Or even because the way you wrote highlights the reality of mental disorders, and you did not try to play it down. I love this because I can feel it. I do not struggle with the mental things you or Aza do, but this made me feel it. I feel like I understand people who struggle deeply with mental disorders more than I ever have. Art is self expression, and I feel like this is your greatest self expression yet. Thank you, John.

THAT. WAS AWESOME. It seems unachievable for me to describe how I felt, but I may as well give it a try. I could feel the inability of Aza to escape her thought spiral, how she felt like she was being forced to do things despite her knowing it's no good / use doing so, which combined greatly with the author-and-role stuff (sorry for that injustice). As you (John) said last time, it's impossible to talk about the thing in perfectly objective way, but only how one perceives it. But your description of OCD was so detailed and to the point that I could FEEL IT(although maybe not perfectly). Truly amazing job, John; thank you for this jewel and all other things you have done.

That. Was. FANTASTIC.

I got so psyched when I saw "Turtles All the Way Down" at my local Meijer's. (I'm buying ASAP) I was like - "It's. John. Green's. Book. *cue scream*" It was so hard to explain to my friends because they had no idea about you or Nerdfighteria, but it was a very happy moment for me.

as an autistic person with adhd, i resonate with this so hard. i’ve mainly heard it’s about OCD, and i haven’t done enough research to tell if i’m close to having it, but i feel the narrator’s overstimulation so incredibly hard and the spiraling thoughts along with the run-on, stream-of-consciousness sort of perspective. i love this so much and now i need to read this

Ah! It's so interesting to hear anxieties, and panic attacks, and and all that stuff from a different perspective than my own. I constantly found myself thinking, I know exactly what this feels like, but also this is completely different subject matter and manifestations than my own. (For anyone curious, I personally, deal with generalized anxiety and occasional bouts of depression.)

I feel as though you just reached inside my mind, pulled out the brown sludge, and extremely poetically put it on paper. I don't know if I've ever felt this exposed and simultaneously understood in my whole life.

This is the first character of yours that, instead of wishing I could be like them, I am like them. I love it.

I think this is your best book yet, John! You just keep getting better and better.

I'm gonna take a wild guess here and say the bacteria thoughts came from that episode of Dear Hank and John where John found out about that being a thing and freaked out and also talked about it in the next episode. I really like this chapter

The best advertisement for a book is hearing its opening. Good idea. I am many times more likely to seek out this story now. Also, I appreciate hearing the voice of a protagonist who clearly gets thought spirals worse than I do.

This!!! I love the way you describe a spiral as not going down but going forever just tighter and tighter. THE VOCABULARY IS ALSO GORGEOUS

I feel like someone's taken a piece of my heart and brain and put it on paper to be spoken out loud. Oh my gosh.

DROP EVERYTHING YOU'RE DOING, FOLKS.

IM ALL THE WAY DOWN WITH THIS

I owe so much to this man. So much, I can not put it into words. I've read all his books, including the ones written in collaboration and I've written him emails more than I have in my inbox, spam, drafts and sent mails all combined only to go unnoticed. Since, unfortunately, I can't write those long emails here I'll just say something so many people have said to him- You have helped me; you have changed the way I think and the way I see things. I just want to thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you.♥️

I have long said that I like John Green as a person and a UKpostsr, but that his writing has never done much for me, but this first chapter really hooked me. After not really enjoying tfios and not really getting what the hype was I wasn't even sure I was going to read John's next book, but I think I'll definitely have to pick up a copy from the library.

I can't believe I was in his book title!

That reference to the parasites is so Dear Hank and John.

That was beautifully written. I last read one of your books some years ago and I’d forgotten how much I love your style

John thank you for everything you do. I think every single one of your books has changed something about me and I think it's amazing that I can read a book about someone who has a completely different life but still thinks about the thinks I think about or enjoys things I enjoy. You have changed my view of the world and I like the way I see it now

did you just make your fictional character suspect that theyre fictional in the opening line? Im not even mad

I think his Michael project should actually be pictures of people named RYAN

Thank you for making this. The video you uploaded where you showed how many takes it took you to say hi to Hank really stuck with me. Even though you were nervous, you did a great job with this reading, and I'm very much looking forward to reading the new book.

The subtle way you hooked me and made me fall in love with this book in 10 minutes is fascinating. I've had it since it came out but I'm a firm believer that I will always be drawn to read a book when I need to hear it's message. I took it out of my bookcase last week and placed it on my nightstand where it has sat until this popped up in my recommended videos. I guess now is the time I need to hear this message.

As always, being exposed to any part of one of your books has given me an overwhelming desire to drop everything and read said book. However, this is the first time this has occurred for me when I did not yet have access to the book, so all I can do is rewatch you read this chapter instead of doing my school work, because I know myself well enough to know that this will take less time than either contemplating what could be coming next in Turtles or the 8 hours I require to reread TFIOS... Basically, I'm obsessed with Turtles already... October still feels too far away. I love everything about this first chapter, and still maintain that I could listen to you read a phone book. Thanks for teasing the first chapter, but also how dare you torture us with the first chapter before we can acquire the entire masterpiece. Best wishes!

When John first said Aza, I understood Hazel.

SO MANY THINGS FROM THE PODCASTS. There are times when you can relate to a story and there are times when it feels like someone tore a page out of your diary and is reading it to you. CAN"T WAIT FOR THE BOOK.

Thank you for being so brave as to tackle perspectives so often overlooked, but especially your own. I imagine it must have been potentially overwhelming at times. I appreciate you for being an ambassador for your/their perspectives so I can attempt to grasp at understanding.

1. someone please loop John saying "my boobs sweat" and make it a song or something. 2. John, you write the most amazing, precocious, slightly annoying but otherwise loveable characters! 3. I know that if you ever need a punishment for video lenght, my suggestion will be for you to write a Chewbacca love story that you have to read out loud for us :)

As someone largely on the other side of OCD that grew from a phobia, this does a better job of communicating what I have felt, than anything else I have ever encountered. I am glad I did not find it when I was younger; the panic that would have followed listening to or reading this would have been all-consuming. It is evocative, without doubt. I look forward to reading the rest! Thank you for writing this ♥️

I'm so proud of you J! I hope see you in Brazil next time!

I am so excited to read the rest of this!! It is so evident that this is intensely personal. I respect John so much for sharing this facet of his struggle--and for doing so with his own style and ridiculous detail (that I love).

I have a test in college tomorrow and John posts this. I have a conflict of interests.

Hmm, the character in the book wants to be the author of her own life, but she's not because John is. John made a video about OCD keeping him from being the author of his own life, is it just turtles all the way down? Does this book get super meta?

I waited to watch this video until I had the book. Glad I could read the first chapter along with you. Really looking forward to the rest of it! Thank you for everything you do!

john green thank you for writing you speak to so many hearts and minds. you pour out your truth onto pages that relates to so many. you have been in my life since 2007 when you started vlog brothers, i was 15 at the time you have been with me for most of my young adult life and you have changed it constantly for the better. Currently i am doing my happy dance while i cry happy tears for turtles all the way down! i cant wait!

The place only properly crazy people get to go Cheyenne Wyoming

I wasn't gonna buy the book but i guess now I HAVE TO DAMN YOU

John, this almost made me cry, it perfectly captures what it's like to have OCD. My brother has been struggling with this illness (it is one for him, because he is heavily affected by it) for over 7 years now and being his sister and the working interpreter for him and my parents at the same time, I have aquired an impressive amount of knowledge about it, without actually being ill myself. I can already hear how intelligently it is written and i can not wait for october! xx from Germany

Very excited for this new book, John it sounds great. Really sounds like a story worth telling, glad you're back at it

I cannot stop crying. Anyone who suffers from mental illness of any kind: we love you, your friends and family love you, and all is well. Stay safe. People care.

I made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich right before pressing play on this, and that was a mistake

thank you for writing this, john -it means a lot to me.

i LOVED it! so excited to read such a different book from you! the last line was so beautiful.

Wow. That was such a realistic portrait of anxiety, it's crazy. I could feel myself growing nervous. I don't have that kind of anxiety (mine is more social than anything), but I completely understand the feeling. I can't wait to read the book!

After watching the first three minutes I have to pause and comment because I'm wondering weather "Dear Hank and John" has influenced this book, or whether this book has influenced the podcast.

i got the book a while ago, but came back today to this video as i finally opened it, there's something really nice to hearing his voice while you read along.

wow so powerful, just tears running down my face listening to that chapter get realer and realer

Warning: do not listen to this while eating. Especially if you are very suggestible and anxious. But this book sounds amazing so far. It feels like jumping into one on my friends minds.

I feel like I can already tell that this is gonna change the way I think

Seeing yourself as the canvas is so much more depressing than seeing yourself as the paint. I love this very much...I really want to know how it continues!

This is the first book you've published since I started following you guys and I'm so excited❤️❤️❤️

French the llama that was awesome 🐢

As a 24 years old man with anxiety disorder and as a hypochondriac, I strongly relate to this. Thank you for this extremely accurate representation!

"I wanted to say more, but the thoughts kept coming" and the spiraling is so spot on, personally. Because who actually craves unpleasant, negative thoughts at any inconvenient time? Well done, John! 👏🐢👏🐢

I can't believe it's been so long since this book came out, but I'm finally going to get it from the library and read it. I'm excited

I think now I understand the title and the cover

JOHN I AM CRYING. I feel like I'm Aza. Your writing is so perfect and it was beautiful hearing you reading it. Thank you for sharing this with nerdfighteria!!!

I am so excited to buy your book soon and read it! I haven´t stoped thinking about it ever since it came out

SO AMAZING! These are the days when I am so proud to be a Nerdfighter. Thank you for sharing, John.

Oh I get it. So like Azel has OCD and it is that idea that has defined her way of thinking and also her way of life. like acting on her own will she decides to not talk to anyone because she doesn't want to. But she does not want to not on her own free will, but rather because her OCD forces her to focus and think in thought spirals, endless, constricting paths that really end up going nowhere, so she cannot will her will. Azel wants be be normal and talk to her friends about art and gossip and stuff but the problem is she can't because all she is forced to think about is the germs growing in her stomach. In a sense she is a spectator in her own life, unable to even think about what she wants, much less do what she wants. it makes you wonder: how much of Azel is really herself and how much of her is her OCD? If she can't even think, cant even will her wills, she must be fictional. she is a canvas that gets painted on not only by exterior forces, but also by herself, by her OCD She pretends to be the author of her story because she has to, but really it is her OCD and Thought spirals that chooses how her story is told. Love the first chapter and can't wait ready how Azel realizes her identity!

What a hero Daisy is, she seems the kind of person I aspire to be on my best days. :)

"I mean, anybody can look at you. It's quite rare to find someone who sees the same world you see." my favorite line!

Gave me chills to hear new content. Missed your writing

The first chapters is already very intense (in a good way) and touching. Also thank you so much for reading it yourself, John! I would love to hear more of if read by yourself! (Project for awesome is coming up *hint* ;) )

So... who are you going to cast as the gut bacteria in the movie?

I love how well you can get inside a character and make readers understand them so well. This was brilliantly written and I cannot wait to get my copy!

The first chapter is AMAZING! So many lines I loved and I already like the characters. Can't wait to read the whole book