Thankyou everyone so much for watching, this one was difficult to write, but im glad I got to share it with you. As always here are the lyrics and the link to stream found.ee/ren-suic-de Oh I, Oh I, Oh I've fallen through the cracks of the night sky A light goes out on the other side, suicide, suicide, suidice Oh I, Oh I, Oh I'm treading on the tracks in the night time It never really felt like the right time suicide, suicide, suicide I'm so fucking lonely beneath this, narcisistic, cant keep a secret, miscount sheep, I can't sleep, a misfit Some say troubled, but some say sadistic, Bruises my brother, one time or the other, my skin felt counterfeit, silicone, rubber Bruises my sister, skin pop the blister dig deep resist the feeling when it hits you Oh I, Oh I, Oh I've fallen through the cracks of the night sky A light goes out on the other side, suicide, suicide, suidice Oh I, Oh I, Oh I'm treding on the tracks in the night time It never really felt like the right time suicide, suicide, suicide [sample] Sick boi, sick boi, bitten by a tick boi I feel like its not me its the world thats sick I'm so fucking washed up and sea sick masochistic kid with a split lip six feet deep I can't eat im nervous won't stay down 'cause my body purges useless my mother, cant keep in my supper skin so pale 'cause my cheeks leak colour Truth is my father, you choose your karma draw for the sword then drive through the armour Oh I, Oh I, Oh I've fallen through the cracks of the night sky A light goes out on the other side, suicide, suicide, suidice Oh I, Oh I, Oh I'm treding on the tracks in the night time It never really felt like the right time suicide, suicide, suicide Suicide suicide suicide Suicide suicide suicide Suicide suicide suicide Suicide suicide suicide It's hard to take off from the ground when your wings are cut, Your stomach burns when you're drinking from an empty cup, You know the entire ocean came from my tear ducts? I see the world through fibonacci sequences and Double Dutch I guess there’s some that’s born lucky, there’s some that’s not I tried to cut away my bitterness - hatchet job I locked my youth in a trunk inside a pick up truck Then dumped the whole thing over the same bridge the night you jumped I think about that sometimes , vividly What it felt like to look down and see tranquility One sudden movement in a world of possibility Only one movement to expose our fragility I fucking miss you and I miss myself I miss thinking that were indestructible as well I miss chilling by the pier cave and kicking back Wirth Callum, Hugo, Sagar, Justin, Stevie and the fuckin lads I miss missing that, I numbed myself to close the gap, I never even call em up the distance is my plaster cast, The truth is that the day you jumped my childhood jumped too, But I still can’t find the anger all I find is missing you Man I miss you, with all my rhymes I picture running 5 minutes quicker, I'm right on time I picture pulling you back over the edge and then were crying And holding you my brother and telling you that it's fine that’s not the way that I worked Coz I was late like a jerk There's not a day where I could find a way to break from the hurt Your body missing so we never got to wave to the hearse I hope your listening , I love you man, I miss you absurd Fuck

I lost my son to suicide 5 years ago. I have been considering my own for those 5 years due to this and my own battle with chronic pain. I found your music last week, Ren, and it saved me. You saved me. SOMEONE knows how I feel!

Today I want to write something beautiful and eloquent but I’ve been staring at my computer screen for the past 10 minutes blankly. So I’ll just write. Today, the 1st of June is my friend Joe’s birthday. I first met Joe when I was 8 years old, my friend Josh said I had to meet this guy, so we both walked over to his, it took about 10 minutes from my house. I was greeted by this kid covered head to toe in freckles, he grinned at us, climbed onto the back of his sofa and screamed “Swanton Bomb!” then front flipped off the top and landed right onto his back on a stone floor. He lay still for a moment, twitched a few times, then got up, grinned at us, brushed himself off, and did it again. This was Joe. He’d do anything to make people laugh. He ended up becoming one of my best friends. He was there when we stole our first cigarettes out of his mums pack, way too young. He was there when I had my first kiss, with a girl twice my size on the back of the 42 bus. He was there when I first got so drunk I threw up in the woods after drinking as much white lightning Cider as we could. I was there when he did his first backflip on skates, and saw him do a 720 off of the pier cave, that moment became legendary. Joe was the funny one in our friend group, he’d make us laugh till it hurt. No one had a bad word to say about him. It was impossible not to like him. Usually we put celebrities, athletes and actors on pedestals, turn them into role models and admire them from a far. The person I admired was Joe. Him and Sagar knew every word to the songs id write, we’d get drunk at parties and they’d be singing along as loud as they could. It gave me a lot of confidence back then. On Christmas Eve 2010 I was sitting in a pub with Joe, he’d been feeling low after a couple of consecutive break ups. He tried to check himself into a mental health outpatient facility a few weeks earlier but they turned him away because he didn’t have an appointment. He turned to me and said that sometimes he wished he could just walk into the sea and keep walking. He said it in a kind of half joking throw away comment type of way, then took a sip of his drink, walked over to the juke box and put Dig by Incubus on. If I knew that was the last time I’d see Joe id have hugged him, told him how much I loved him, how much I looked up to him, how much we all loved him, and I wouldn’t have left that pub. I didn’t know that, so I finished my drink, said happy Christmas and left. Two nights after Christmas I got woken up by a phone call at 3am, it was my friend Ella. She told me Joe was on the Menai Bridge, a large suspension bridge connecting the main land to the isle of Anglesey where we lived. He’d been on the phone to her in tears saying goodbye. He told her to tell everyone he loved them. I pulled on my clothes as fast as I could and started running toward the bridge. It was up a hill. I lived about a ten minute walk away, I could run it in five. As I ran I started dialling then redialing his number. The line was busy, which was a good sign, it meant he was still on the phone to someone. As I got about halfway, the busy tone changed. It told me the line was out of service. I got a sinking feeling and picked up my speed. I arrived to the bridge minutes after I left my house. It was deafeningly quiet. I was the first person to arrive. I got there probably about 2 minutes too late. Joe’s body was never found. Initially we refused to believe he was gone. The coastguard came out that night, with boats, and helicopters. Me and my friends spent the next 10 days putting up missing posters everywhere we could, walking up and down beaches with flashlights, getting about 3 hours sleep a night. When you’re walking up and down a beach with a torch when its dark everything looks like a body. We still haven’t found Joe. As his birthday came around, I wrote a song, freckled angels, a song I dedicated to Joe which I sang in front of his friends and family. A charity football match was put on for him, raising money for the RNLI where I won two bottles of wine in a raffle, I drank them both as quickly as I could, naturally, turned to my friend and probably slurred something along the lines of “This is the last time I ever drink” That was 12 years ago, I haven’t touched a drop of alcohol since. My first ever album I named Freckled Angels in tribute of one of the best people I ever knew. Skip forward some years. I’d been sitting on this song I wrote a few years ago. It always felt a little incomplete. It was going to be my next release, but I was dreading it because of this feeling of incompletion. I decided, very last minute, to do something about it. I sat by my piano, and the rest of the song fell out of me. I hadn’t thought about Joe in a little while, and the song initially wasn’t going to be about him, but the words all fell out of me. I wrote and recorded a whole 2 minutes extra, recording each part as I wrote it. Tears spewing out of my eyes pretty much the whole time, and decided not to do my usual thing of perfecting each line, I just recorded every line as it came. During this campaign I will be raising money for the RNLI, the group of brave men and women who spent hours tirelessly looking for Joe after the night he went missing. I'll also be donating 50% of the profit on all copies of the 'Freckled Angels' album directly to Joes family as a nice surprise gift. I will include links to the RNLI donation page below where 100% of the money will go to support them, I will be travelling to the UK later this month to make a music video, and have carved out a couple of days where I will travel to my home town on the isle of Anglesey to present the royal national lifeboat institution with a cheque of all the money raised. Turn on notifications for the video here: ukposts.info/have/v-deo/pmN7gqqdoGqHw2Q.html Raising money for RNLI : www.justgiving.com/page/ren-gill-1685546882254?Link&/ren-gill-1685546882254& Freckled Angels album: renmakesmerch.com/products/freckled-angels-cd Presave Suic*de: found.ee/ren-suic-de

"It never really felt like the right time." I've never seen a single sentence so perfectly describe suicidal thoughts. Constant, always there, always on your mind, but just... not quite yet. I'm just going to finish this book. I want to know what happens in the next season of that show. I can't leave the house this much of a mess, I'll do a deep clean first. There's always a reason it's not quite the right time yet. Until the moment it is. And when you feel this way, every second of your life is spent finding things that make it not the right time yet. I've never heard anyone make music that understood me like Ren does. I'm mentally ill, severely depressed, and I have an autoimmune disorder. He reaches out to us and says, "You're not alone in this." Some nights moments like that are the only reason it isn't the right time. I hope he knows that. I hope you know, Ren, you're saving lives with your music.

As a nurse i know people want to say dont talk about this but its a good sign when someone opens up about their thoughts about this. Ren thank you for this video and song. There's nothing wrong with feeling and opening up to let others know they can talk. I want them to talk before its too late. Thank you Ren

Tomorrow is the six year anniversary of losing my 20 year old child in similar circumstances. Time does not heal, it accommodates. Beautiful song Ren. Thank you.

This is not a career, not a march to fame, this is a man's artist journey we get to follow 🙏❤️

Englsih is not my native language so i'll do my best. Thanks man, I've been in a depression for about 12 years, I fought as hard as I could but I've started considering suicide 6 month ago. With my last piece of life I asked for help but no one answered to my call. But i heard your song and it gave me enough energy to fight one last time and find the right people to help me and it worked. Now I have pills but not forever and i can live a new life. I know I own it to myself but you helped me so much. So thank you with all my still beating heart.

I'm a survivor of an attempt and I have to say that your music resonates with me. It's such a lonely, pain filled place to be, thinking about suicide, making the plan to end things. If someone had showed me your music back then I wouldnt have felt so alone. I doubt I would have followed through if id had even a bit of hope that things could be better. Im grateful to still be here and to have had the chance to do so much more with my life. PLEASE, never stop believing in yourself! You are reaching so many people with what you have created.

I am a 75 year old woman, and this got my first UKposts comment ever. Thank you, beautiful boy.

45 years ago I drove my car off a bridge. Last week I contemplated an overdose the difference between now and then; I know the feeling will pass. Keep writing Ren, it's needed.

Rest in peace, Lunney. Will always appreciate your friendship through school.

Please never silence your voice nor your light, Ren. You are a beacon.

You’re a beautiful soul Ren. Thank you for everything you do.

It feels like a privilege to be allowed so far into your heart Ren. I'm sorry for the pain you feel.

You saved a lot people w that song man... Hope you know... We all thank you...

This video smashes EVERY commercially made music video, that's EVER been made. Within 2 minutes of watching my first Ren video, "Hi Ren", my instincts were SCREAMING super nova. Dude is miles above super star potential. Maybe the most versatile and influential musicians to ever exist. I'm 50, I've heard it ALL and never heard anything like this kid. I told my wife he was different, after hearing 1 song and then I dove down the rabbit hole and realized just how different, versatile and intelligent Ren is. Genius recognizes genius and this kid is HIGH level genius, PERIOD, not just verbally. EVERYTHING he does SCREAMS genius. Kid is the Saitama of the music world. Killing everything with a single punch. Stay freelance bro, never go industry. You don't need those rats. Your star is rising, regardless. You ARE a force of nature, no doubt.

Hi Ren. I’m a 55yo Veteran who suffers from PTSD,Major chronic depression,Bipolar disorder plus many physical issues. I cannot explain how much your music resonates in me. THANK YOU. Never give up your truth,you are helping people in ways that you and I cannot imagine . I pray for your strength to carry on in this disjointed world and for your happiness and success. Again THANK YOU. I lost 7 brothers in a single year from 4 different wars a while back I wish they had had the opportunity to hear this,maybe some of them would still be around. To all my veteran brothers and sisters out there never,give up I can tell you from my own personal struggles and attempts that there is hope and light on the other side I’ve seen and lived it. I love and pray for you all no matter where you served or who with . One foot in front of the other and NEVER give up,it’s what we do.

Hi Ren…I’m sorry you lost your friend. I lost my son. He would’ve loved your music! Thank you for writing such a beautiful song. You will save lives with your art ❤

I'm currently in a detox unit recovering from a heroin addiction I don't think I can do this and I don't Wana be here anymore I hate feeling this way ren Ur music helps me so much more than you know thankyou

I have been struggling with dark thoughts for a long time and last night I found myself scared, alone in the woods, it has never got this bad before. In the UK, the video has a link to “the Samaritans”, a charity there for those who need some emotional support. I clicked the link and spoke to a lovely lady for half an hour. Then the police came and helped direct me to more support and crisis centre. Last night. This song saved my life. Thank you Ren. Thank you so much.xx

This song was released on what would've been my son Elijah's 24th birthday. He took his own life on September 24, 2021. Ren your music touches me, moves me. Your honesty helps me heal. So thankful that you exist.....

I lost my son to suicide 7 months ago and grieving has been life changing .Thank you for this song as my son suffered from mental illness and this song is a tiny glimpse into the torture he endured. I only wish he had heard your music before he ended his life .

Man this really does hit different to most modern music. The emotion being expressed is on a whole other level. it’s more than just music.

Brother…I haven’t cried since late 2006, after I hit my last roadside bomb in Iraq, and was flown to Washington DC, for a year of ineffective mental treatment. I haven’t cried in 16 years…unable, or unwilling. I listen to your music constantly while I’m out drinking, after once being 20 months sober. As a writer myself, every time I hear one of your songs, I understand them a little bit more… A couple weeks ago when I stopped a medication, my emotions came back…now…I can’t listen to you without crying. I want you to know, you give people like myself permission to feel, to be pissed off, and accept whom we are. As human beings, or artists, and students of navigating our own minds. You are truly loved and appreciated, brother…empathy doesn’t make us weak…it reminds us that what we do for ourselves, we do for others. 🤙🏻

During a month-long camping trip in the summer of ‘97 I found my friend hanging in a tree when I woke up one morning. To this day I have never shared my thoughts or feelings of that morning with anyone. I’ve carried this baggage for decades, not knowing what to do with it. I appreciate you, Ren. You are able to express feelings that I haven’t been able to articulate all these years. Cathartic. Thanku. ❤️‍🩹🫶🏼

Loneliness and self critism are my companions throughout my journey of whatever this life is. Suicidal thoughts give me company often i try to drown them out but i am so depressed its almost deafining

Fell down a ren rabbit hole tonight. 1 hour in and sleeps been calling🥲

Your an absolute legend my brother. Because of you, now we all know Joe, and his memory will forever live on. I’m certain he would be so proud of you

My 16 yr daughter has been suicidal for past 4 years. I haven't been able to really reach her , I've used anger, talking, coaching, and begging. I showed her this today we cried. This showed her there's 2 sides to suicide the person we loose & the person they loved in us that would go with them. Thank you Ren for being so vulnerable & valuable at the same time.

7-22-23 it’s been the roughest few days since my brother took his own life. I’m lost. I’m broken. This song is hitting me beyond words. Hold your loved ones close. Rest in peace Chris. I miss you absurd.

I remember discovering you in a busking video a few years ago. Seeing how far you've come, and everything you've gone through on the way. The world is gonna know you. Make the ground shake, Ren!

My nephew died of suicide about one week after I last got close to it. I got help. He didn't let anyone know. This was a few weeks ago. This is the only time I will mention it. The family keeps silent. Self destruction runs in our family. I learned how to transform suicidal feelings by letting go of things instead of myself. I am still letting go, to make sure the urge does not come back during this very dark time. I keep finding purpose in my life to keep from doing this thing to myself. You help me so much with this task. When I heard a few days ago that you were planning to release this song I was relieved. We are the kind who walk through the fire and out the other side. We talk about it. My nephew couldn't do that. Let's keep talking. It helps.

I lost my girlfriend to suicide 4yrs ago, completely fucked up my life. Brought me to suicide, brought me to addictions to numb the emptiness. I pray those who are experiencing the same thing, same thoughts, same feelings, reach out. I love you, we can get through this ❤️

Ren's music cuts so deep, yet heals at the same time. Thank you, Ren. For all that you are, for all that you do. ❤

2:26 when it drops here, the breathing and the piano weeping,, sounding so very alone in the world, detached from everything and everyone. This is an incredible piece of art Ren. Here’s to Joe, your wonderful best friend. 💜💜💜E|3 💜💜💜

Wow, "It's hard to take off from the ground when your wings are cut".... That is deep... my son died by suicide in 2014, Ren, Thank You for voicing the pain that occurs after having someone die by suicide. I am constantly awaiting your new songs to be posted!! Love your work!! Thank You!!

As a nurse, CPP, DID, and AuDHD…this song hits and hurts. I am glad to say attempting was more of a struggle than talking about myself and how I’m feeling. Thank you REN!

This is the rawest,most honest song I have ever heard. Thank you, Ren. Your honesty honors us.

Oh Ren, as someone who considered taking the decision to ‘stop’ and who is now working as a mental health nurse, your ability to articulate the pain and emotion of depression and su!c!de just blows me away, every single time. What a beautifully artistic soul you have. That was absolutely breathtaking 💔

such a powerful song.. as someone who has attempted suicide a few times, and struggles with Complex PTSD, and also as someone who lost a close friend to suicide, this song is so relevant to me.

I'm 50 and been on antidepressants for 25 years. I still think about suicide every day. I've done therapy. Multiple prescriptions. All the shit they recommend. Nothing helps. I keep living for the people that depend on me. I'm glad you're giving a platform for the young generation so they have someplace to go with their feelings. ❤ PS you're awesome.

This song is incredible. Thank you for writing it.

This is my first time listening to Ren and the end absolutely broke me. This line "but I still can't find the anger all I find is missing you" made me sob. Never before I've heard someone putting into words that feeling

I have been completely depleted since hurricane Ian, I Lost almost everything and now separated after 20 years of marriage, don’t get to see my children every day anymore which crushes my soul. Ren you have helped give me faith when I thought it was no longer possible. Keep fighting the good fight please,it helps so many, thank you.

One of the more enjoyable tangential effects of Ren Fandom is that, if you accidentally get really obsessive, you get to know Joe a little bit along the way. Thanks, ren.

This song is a life-saving masterpiece. I am crying right now. For the past couple of years I've been feeling extremely suicidal, every day was starting with hate to myself and thinking of the ways I could kill myself to free my loved ones from that kind of garbage person I am. Now you've helped me to see the other side of suicide. I realize now that some people actually love me and will feel guilty for not being close to me enough, for not being able to help me in time. I feel extremely guilty right now for expressing all my suicidal thoughts to them and I also have very paradoxical thoughts that I can not put together and express I am crying. Thank you, Ren. I will try to get rid of suicidal thoughts. Thank you.

There's not many songs in my 50+ years revolving around the sun that have left me in tears... And here we are, writing this comment moist eyed and emotional. So sad for your loss Ren, but thank you for opening your heart to the world.

My sons first experience of suicide was when their 16 year old cousin took his own life. In a 2 year period we were connected to 6 other men who also chose that path; my eldest son's best mate, at 23, an uncle... the list goes on... thank you for talking about it and I look forward to hearing your words in this song. Words are so important. Stay strong.

Anyone listening to this, just know no matter what anyone says, there is only one you in this world, you couldn't be more unique and more special! One of a kind! ❤

This young man who talks like he's old. He talks like he's been through it, he talks like he's cold. Talks like he's been around, talks like he's up and down, talks like he's deep down in it. This guy is brilliant.

12 years and it’s every day that I miss my brother. Thank you for releasing your art. It helps and it heals. ❤❤❤❤❤

“He tried to check himself into a mental health outpatient facility a few weeks earlier but they turned him away because he didn’t have an appointment.” 💔 That’s a great photo of you both - and I hope everyone donates in anyway they are able. Take good care thank you for sharing Joe’s story. For creating and sharing. For choosing to be here now. 💛

I don’t often comment but wanted to say thank you for helping my husband finally release the pain of losing his friend of 50+ years the same way and realising he is not alone in the way he feels. You have a very unique talent.

Hi Ren. i'm 51 years old, diagnosed with Parkinsons at 39. I went from young to an old man so quickly, it would make your head spin. today is better then tomorrow but worse then yesterday. I'm so so sorry for the pain you've experienced in your life, but i thank you for sharing

This one just hits different. No words man, Just wow...

Simply outstanding (again!). I'm 69 years old and I've never seen or heard anyone as authentic as Ren. We are witnessing the emergence of a very special talent 👏👏👏

My cousin took his life at 12. He was my idol, my heart. Then my father took his life. I lost what was left of my childhood that day. My awesome uncle Bill copycat committed suicide after Dad. Then I snapped and tried as well. I was resuscitated 3 times, ended up in a coma, and was later diagnosed with PTSD. I had done it on my father's suicide anniversary without even realizing it... Almost died at just 15 years old. I struggled with substance abuse for the next several years. My Mom tried next. This was JUST in my family. I have lost friends too. I am so grateful to be alive today. I am so glad I escaped the cycle. LIFE GOT BETTER. I would have missed out on so much happiness. Reach out, cry for help! Don't leave your loved ones behind. I spent so many decades wondering why I wasn't enough to keep my Dad around... It's not about that, tho. The brain is our heart. It is full of chemical reactions, electrical currents, and sometimes, crossed wiring. If you feel overwhelmed, lost, in darkness, in guilt, in pain, remember that you can & should reach out for help. I know it can be hard, but please, stop, breathe, call somebody. Just live. Don't let pride get in the way. It's brave to ask for help. Thank you, Ren. You've created something very special here. Your compassion to help others is appreciated ♡

This really hit me, especially during the last part when Ren put his entire heart and soul into how he felt. An amazing song that has and will touch people like me.

Man you know how to crumble me and doubtlessly many others. So fucking heart wrenching. The world needs your music and your fragility.

This was the hardest one yet. I lost my mom, then my little brother and sister to suicide in the years following. It’s been hard to be the only one left, but people like you really give us all hope and support with your words. Thank you, Ren.

Young artist, I am a middle-aged woman from Canada. I have lost so many friends to drugs and suicide. My days are ghosts. This captured it perfectly. Thank you.

I do my best not to feel feelings. It's what we're supposed to do as men. but fuck it's been six years since my boy Cody left us, I was at work and I thought I'd just call him back when I got home. That whole five minutes too late is fucking killing me.

Been just over a year since my best friend committed. I still think about it everyday that I’m lucid. This song makes me cry a bit every time I listen to the lyrics. First time I heard it I had to replay it a few times. Finally decided to come watch the video too. It’s uncanny how much I relate to every lyric in this song. I hope Ren knows just how much this song means to so many people. It’s incredible. It’s f-king incredible.

It's not just that this song is beautiful and shattering in its own right, but we all actually love Ren. Not like, "Oh, I love that band," We Love Ren like family or a long time friend. The song touches us even more because we care so much about the person singing it.

Lost my son to suicide 7 years ago - when I first heard Hi Ren it resonated on so many levels for male mental health. Thank you for your courage in bringing this crisis to the front of our minds and confronting the epidemic that is so taboo in our society. ❤ love and strength to you Ren! You are a legend!

I've listened to this 10+ times today, grieving the loss of three loved ones in just the last few months, this has really let me just sit and feel everything today. Sometimes it's just hard to let yourself feel, but listening to this opened the emotional floodgates. Thank you for that.

dope frfr 🔥

When I was 18, I lost my 16yo sister to suicide. It's been almost 9 years and it still hurts. She was my best friend and I miss her every day and want her by my side. What a strong song this is, Ren. Thank you for such beautiful, relatable words. My sincere condolences.

I’m still in recovery from a su!ic!de attempt in February. I was sectioned and am now in a much better place. Things really can get better but i didn’t believe it when I was in that headspace. It’s truly a disease. I’ve struggled with thoughts like that since I was 17. I’m 25 now. Thank you for this song Ren. If I hadn’t lived I wouldn’t have gotten to hear it ❤️ I try to look for the little things like that now. There’s so much to experience and learn and see. Thank you for making all of us feel less alone and seen. Thank you for sharing your art with the world. It’s a much better place with you in it. Condolences for your friend. I hope he found peace. 😓

I felt every word of that lyrical bomb, bro! Good job getting that out of your head!

The songs that you put out recently are incredible, just brilliant, unique,original, strong stuff, love them all.

The honesty in your emotion is utterly vital. You’re doing something hugely important, Ren.

Well, I'm fucking wrecked. The emotion you poured into this is beautiful. I hope making it helped you heal just a little more. You've got an army behind you now and we appreciate you more than you will ever know. 🖤🖤

About 12 years ago I woke up one morning and decided to take my life, I prayed and said that if nothing good came from that day that I would end it. I remembered where my parents hid the keys to their safe and took my dad's revolver, I took a shower and afterwards was sitting on the bed just feeling the weight of everything on my shoulders, my phone rang, it was an old lovely lady called Ren, personally calling to let me know that I got in to a college that I applied for, her words were that she just felt like calling everyone today to let us know we got in although we would receive an email soon, I thanked her politely and after the call I just started weeping. Looking back now, I would've missed so much, in this time I met my wife, bought my first house, was able to meet my brother's kids, meet some of my now best friends and get my dream job... I guess that through this message I wanted to say never give up, don't look at now, look at what could be, things will get better as long as you keep fighting, there is always hope, never believe the lie that you are alone and that life is not worth it, that you are not worth it... you truly are and you are loved, maybe you don't feel it now, but you will. ❤

This song hits hard. It allows me to process and feel emotions i try to suppress. Thank you for sharing.

freckled angels laugh the hardest and their smiles they are the largest

Came down from apartment to donate to a busker today, as I heard her performing ‘How to be me’ we both evangelised to a passer by about REN’s awesomeness! So I bought her a pint as well. 😂

Ren, I am a 52 year old schizophrenic. There are things that I would love to share and say to you but I am terrified of the internet so I will just say this; When I was in my teens (before meds and therapy) I had decided to take my own life. One young man in one of my classes, not a boy I knew personally, figured it out and patiently but determined would not let me go home until I promised that I wouldn't. After several hours of me dodging the truth and denying his accusations I finally, just to get rid of him, I bitterly swore to him that I would never take my own life. I kept my promise. Several years later he died of cancer and I often think of him knowing that because of him, I still draw breath to this day. Every time I smile, laugh, celebrate my birthday I think of him and quietly in my heart dedicate it all to him. You are so profoundly brave to me. I see his fire and passion to help in you. I relate to so much of your work and I find it inspiring and validating. I just want to say that from one human being to another, I see you, I feel it all too, I love you like a brother, and thank you for seflessly giving so deeply of yourself so brazenly to the masses to reach ones like me. 💞

Your talent is stunning, the lyrics, the twists the turns,the remix’s, the fusion of bits of your other stuff that always seem to fit, the different types of music you use, the way you wear your heart on your sleeve and your beautiful transparency

I am so happy i stumbled upon all this new music tonight. I am in awe of you. Always have been. Amazing.

I'm a 46 year old male and this is the first song that's made me cry that isn't directly associated with a moment in my own life. Between 'Hi Ren" and this I've never encountered an artist that hits me in the soul so hard.

As someone who lost a dear friend to suicide, this hits hard. My deepest condolences on your loss Ren.

20 years of Army baggage, some lines hit me like a tuning fork that makes so l;oud it makes me grit my teeth to listen as it hits spot on well past the comfort zone. Beautiful.

Thank you for sharing with us. I needed your music!

Dude I literally don’t understand how you never miss for me. With every other artist I have obvious favorites and others I don’t vibe to. But, me personally, ya just never miss. Also, aside from the music, the artistry of this video is amazing. I’d watch an entire series in this style.

You are something else mate……..I’ve introduced my 10 year old lad to your stuff and withheld a few expletives here and there 😂 but hearing him sing the first few bars of ‘illest of our time’ in the shower this morning made my heart melt. He loves you man and your music is the first he’s ever taken an interest in. He’ll never forget you bro and long will your legacy live on as it’s growing by the minute!!!

Wow, powerful stuff. Hits like a brick. Thanks for creating and sharing this. Brilliant.

I found you and your music about a year ago with Violet's Tale. I was in a dark time then and you sorta just hit home and i fell in love with your message and your passion. You've helped me through some really tough times and I'd like to thank you. It's taken time for me to actually sit and listen to this song because I know what it's about and what it means to you. I'm so sorry for your loss and I really hope your friend is in a good place right now, watching you and seeing the man you've become. I'm having a few drinks right now, and one is going to be for you and yours. Keep doing what you're doing Ren. Even in the darkest times, we can always find the light

I am a GRIEF and LOSS Specialist. This is a fucking masterpiece, Ren. You are a musical and lyrical genius. KEEP passing the glory of your talent to the ONENESS that we're ALL dew drops of. Dew drops of the Divine. Expressing Itself as Ren for a little while. Glad I get to witness this expression in my own lifetime. Hugs 🫂

This is the authenticity in music that the world needs. Please don't ever stop doing this.

Nothing else to say but thanks man. You’re a truly powerful story teller who’s raw and human and it’s needed so badly in the world to have people willing to be this way. It’s a hard path to take.

just keep coming back... absolutely brilliant

The day this comes out is my birthday and I've been living with cripling depression and anxiety for 4yrs, right now I'm low but I know I can be the man I was again. I too had a friend like Joe, last year he jumped of a cliff even though he hated heights and nobody knows why he did. We all have our bad times and need someone to listen, we need to look out for our loved ones and try to be the hand they need for support. I am so glad I found you Ren as your music has helped ground me when I'm start to slip, thankyou for being a beautiful person.

I lost my father to suicide almost 25 years ago. I almost got to him in time but was too late. You words encapsulate perfectly that anger, guilt and sadness. Thank you for making this song, it is needed.

I suffered childhood trauma that in my adulthood won't let me shed tears for myself. But the tears and the emotion burst like a broken dam from my body when I hear you sing my friend. May God bless you in all ways and always ❤

Please make 2.30 minutes as a single version. I feel this so much and it's also so damn beautiful. Some piano intro included and it would be the next masterpiece 😍 keep going, love ya ❤️

Lost my dad to it. It’s been 8 years (as of May 15th). Think of him every day. Remind myself to “get past today. Tomorrow is a different problem.” Honestly believe that your music helps. Didn’t know if I really wanted to hear this, but thankful I did. From one stranger to another, thank you and much ❤.

I have spent the last couple of months thankfully disappearing down the REN rabbit hole. I am 59 years old and over the course of the past 4+ decades, I have been exposed to many brilliant recording artists... I can honestly say, NO artist has ever touched me more, inspired me more and ultimately impressed me more than REN!! Your musical and lyrical abilities are up there with the very best of them... BUT what sets you apart in my opinion, is your willingness to strip your soul naked in front of us and expose us to every raw emotion you felt in the creation of each masterpiece song. You are the catalyst that helps us rediscover our own emotional literacy. You are the musical & lyrical bard of our times. Please never change!

Young man, I'm so amazed by you. What a wonderful song ....I hope it helps others step back from the edge!!! Love your bravery to share your loss and thereby give hope to others.