Good approach. But sometimes I think there is nothing in their life that's so bad - they're just horrible people. When I've had close family members dying, I never went to work and tried to be obnoxious to other people. You are 100% right about never sharing stories or personal info - they will ALWAYS repeat and twist it to others later.

@@goodyeoman4534yeah keep your cards close to your chest but sometimes they’ll start asking things about you to get information about you to use it against you or try to make you look stupid/bully you. Idk what to do in that situation because if somebody asked you “where do you live at?” How do you dodge the question without seeming like an asshole? You gotta keep in mind other peoples opinion of you, if you come on too strong or aggressive to the bully, others will see that and just think you’re being a dick when they don’t see the subtle mind games the bully is playing with you to torment you. Then when it comes down to it, those other people won’t have your back because they’ll say “well you were rude to this person here”

I agree with you 100 percent. Some people just need to get laid more often as well! That’s putting it bluntly but it’s the truth.

@@isolatedbutjacked7036 The more you say, the more they can twist. Yes, they can twist silence too, but with far less success. Plus, staying silent REALLY winds them up.

Nice way to live life buddy. Not at all a dull life with no funny and interesting interactions or discussions! Stop caring about what people think of you or what they make of your story. I get your point, but I think its a good quote not a way of life pal

100%

Read as *most broken* from this discussion.

Amen!

The best leader is constantly training their replacement

Laziest people need to find a better fit that sparks their real fuel. 6 months in, if they're only going downhill - time to go - life is short. Time to do the real work. Regardless of what they say, how's their attitude and energy most days? That's a hell of a lot more honest than the words.

100%

People in managerial positions are terrified to admit mistakes or wrongdoing because it will lead to being undermined.

This

@@randombutrelevant1606I buy this more than the “tolerate until you die” and “toughen up”approach stated by this op. My time isn’t worth dealing with shit like that.

What company?

Same

​@te9591 CDW

Same. I was VP of a company and the owner enjoyed pitting one manager against the other, drama lover. I was #10 to resign in disgust after 30 months working there and 6 years into the company's existence. He has since fired senior manager #11 & #12. This is a small company of ~100 people. It is a joke. He was President of bigger companies (always had a boss himself), but left to his own devices he created a hellhole of yes men.

@sburns2421 i was in a shiddy fast food job where the store manager would not correct behavior so toxicity would escalate to crew violence and he would sit back and laugh about it. And i believe that the managerial crew would laugh at the videos in private.

100%. There is no reconciliation with a narc boss.

and even if there was reconciliation, its always going to be YOU admitting YOU failed THEM. LOL @@acangial1

​@@slonktonkster9680never break, racist narcs are the worst.never ending torment, their such a drag living in the past, everyday.

Honeypot them, then exploit their weakness and poor judgement. Keep your distance from the BAIT, maintain your plausible deniability. You want to control them, not destroy your job or the company. EVERY narcissist has their kink, your job is to use it to trap them.

​@1101agaoj how do you honeypot someone. Could you help point me in the right direction of the honeypot

Because they are managers, not leaders...Boeing is a perfect example of late; - in 28 years, I had one manager that was a leader, and he resigned his position after about a year and went back to being a worker. He then focused on being an adjunct professor part time until he earned a full time position and left the company.

What if the other person is only a dick when the leader is not around?

I dont get paid to like em either

I can dislike anyone I want without them knowing and if your not pulling your weight I definitely won't like you.

​@MajikalCowpoke At minimum it should be neutral. Stress is a business and life killer

The time spent to talk behind someone's back is the time not spend on doing tasks. So proper response is "Shut up and go back to your work !!!". There are only two options possible. Someone is really toxic and impossible to work with, or he is much better then others and is perceived as threat by others so they want him to get laid off. Management stuff simply do not even consider the second option out of convenient or ignorance. So they usually get rid of "troublesome" guy. The problem only occurs when the guy is irreplaceable ... I both situation, the worker who has time to talk behind his back, is not doing his job !

@@brandibrat226 Yup. I love how the person you responded to never had anything to say in response to this. And also, to the person you responded to, it doesn't always come crashing down like a house of cards, sometimes it just stays the same, other times it comes crashing down on you instead of them...

​@@PhillyEaglesFanatic it always comes crashing down like a house of cards, your comment alone suggests you are probably one of the toxic asf people are having to work with that I am talking about.

Work related - yes - but anything else - no. And dont offer up any charity because you will simply be subscribing to their shit. My point was - if you are in a toxic relationship - leave , if you are in a dead end job with toxic people - leave (and maybe start a business?), if you are surrounded by negative people in a friendship group etc - leave. You will soon make friends. Going out on your own, standing on your own two feet and doing things yourself is the most liberating self-help thing you can do for yourself.

@@_____7704 "it always comes crashing down like a house of cards" Not always. Sometimes it does, but not always. You are making a very absolute, across the board statement as if it happens 100% of the time, without fail, in all situations. When it does come crashing down, it varies on who it comes crashing down on. "your comment alone suggests you are probably one of the toxic asf people are having to work with that I am talking" Seriously dude? What makes you say that? I have dealt with plenty of crappy and toxic behavior in the workplace, I just recently "escaped" from once such place. Slap full of toxic assholes. Hypocritical f**kers with fragile egos, the classic dish it out but can't take it, antagonistic pricks, and oppositional defiant traits in all but maybe one of them. Lol. I'm not a toxic coworker. Im also not a perfect coworker mind you. If I have any trait verging on toxic, it's complaining subtly or outright to my fellow coworkers about ridiculous bullshit from management because they are a disaster instead of just sucking it up and getting the work done.

@@_____7704 Still waiting for a response from you on my last comment above from 17 hours ago.

We either win or we learn. Either is GOOD.

That is a Moronic quote.

There is a caveat to that. If the person gets beat under the same conditions or if the other person is doing so by going above and beyond what is expected. Like working nights and weekends, not taking any time off, etc. Like a business purposely taking a loss to undercut a competitor.

EchelonFront not every has to be a lesson. Sometimes you just fail at life.

Except for Elon Musk.

Everyone is replaceable, the trick is to be easier to put up with than you are to be replaced

Bullshit

Because truly irreplaceables don't get paid what they're worth so they leave, hence inevitable replacement

I am! Traditional mindset: Like our James Grant did as We too since the day he was knighted to then be appointed as the 1st Sheriff of their 2 separate GRANT Counties in the Highlands appointed🗡️,no shield 🛡️ or armor. Just Highland Sheriff going it alone, every day. Now overnight, in hopes of helping those at greatest time of THEIR need I was conceived to full fill the family line that one day was started a legacy in Strathspey of 1206. An oath, Also know today as “Protect and Serve”….( All others before one’s self & never back down but, “Stand Fast!” -King and Chieftain of Clan Grant. 0:22 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 (* and , yes today we still go out with little to no sense of Self Preservation nor the mental capacity to retreat. I still Patrol 3 areas solo from 22:00 - 07:00 those hours the other 3 PDs are On Call overnights + me. ( Would be nice to have a K9 along 🐕‍🦺❤)

100 percent. Especially in tech and engineering

I really doubt everyone else is the problem. Probably you’re delusional. Or you have purposely made yourself irreplaceable (unpromotable). They have done studies that show psychopaths create chaos and appear to be the best because they thrive in their own shit.

Character assassination is a key tool of poor management. To single out certain workers as toxic is usually a tactic to delegitimize their valid issues, concerns, or grievances. Quite often, the most toxic people at jobs are the most outgoing, charismatic., and entertaining.

It's crazy because people get like scared. I'm similar

Don’t ever work at a charity. It’s even worse in that sector.

I had this happen to me when I began as a CNA. I worked circles around my coworkers, thinking I was doing what I was supposed to be doing and doing it because it was important and caring about the residents needs. Little did I know this would cause me to become targeted and disliked by my coworkers. So much so that I began to hate coming into work and confused to why I was having all this trouble with coworkers when I simply showed up and did my job to the best of my ability each day. Then I found that this was the case in every healthcare scenario I worked in. The healthcare industry is only in business to make money. In no way does caring for and treating a patients needs enter the top priority for healthcare in this country. And additionally, I've concluded that you have to be heartless and have a gossipy, clique-forming, high school girls type of attitude to fit in and last.

I pray all of you stay true to your integrity, even in the face of the crabs in the bucket...you're golden, rare.

@@gangstadrz9326 Government, too. Government jobs tend to attract uncompetitive men, who all just want to keep sucking on the taxpayers teet until they retire so they can still suck on it some more. Whining about how offended someone is, is just a form of soft bullying. The thing about having a command voice is that it evokes action, something most prior service military and police understand but is deemed offensive by the weak. Same thing with throwing the bell curve in elementary school. You throw the bell curve for all the normal and slow kids, you're gonna get hated. Probably even by the teacher as well.

Maybe it's just me but I was asked at one point a few years ago if I was training anyone to do the things that I could do and I said "isn't that how you get replaced?" and my boss said, "no, that"s how you get promoted" Since that short conversation I still work for the same company and I've been promoted 3 times.

It’s a primary responsibility of doing a job to ensure that job can get done without you. If you are in an organization where people are holding power by holding knowledge or some other trickery, start looking for a new team. If you aren’t on the inside of the scam, you will get cheated until you get ejected.

Many exceptions, of course. There's a bunch of backend programmers fresh off college and a full stack greybeard on the team. What is he supposed to do, take 10+ years of his life to teach them what he has learned, much of which may well rely on logical/mathematical/analytical talent that cannot actually be taught?@@nunyabidness3075

Empire building is something completely different.

@@davidnelson7719 different to what?

@@pm3577 To what you just described. Just google the term.

I mean... its possible they come up because you are being spied on by your technology.

The team still has to succeed, no matter who is the coach, director, or leader. Decentralized Command is the only way to prepare for an unforeseen departure.

Bruh, if you want to play basketball on the '95 Bulls you gotta pass Jordan the ball.

Contrary to popular belief, management can't actually affect change on a grassroots level. Much that we would like to see them perform in this way The job of a manager is to respond to crisis or effectively handle complaints against the brand. They aren't equipped to be interpersonal or even to have influence. This is why I don't address personal concerns. Just let it ride until it becomes a pressing matter that leadership absolutely have to address in the way only they can It isn't in their brain structure to reroute misunderstandings. The best you could hope for is exactly as you said, check back in a couple months. This is because the issue of poor communication has to be on the docket and resemble company wide change, otherwise it doesn't fall into the wheel house of concern This is why it's on you to bring it to attention as an initiative. Again, their role is to spot check topical concerns. A disgruntled customer, a blown over sign, excessive toilet paper use Their measure of control is to make monument of what they put their hands to when it comes time for a reckoning. It probably goes back to old hunter gatherer methods of rewards for valor. Letting the whole tribe see what initiative looks like. They get a surge of chemicals, dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin for their troubles. A bit more autonomy and maybe a larger helping of the game for that evening If you are struggling to maintain communication, this is because your ambition runs contrary to that effect. The chief is really looking for ways to strengthen his own resolve and wants to motivate his tribe to seek out solutions and ideas to that end. If you're not driving deep and padding out the big score in spite of routine challenges, it doesn't net him any more progress toward reassurance. Go and do 85 burpees, etc This is disappointing because excessive sharpening actually makes the instrument blunt. You would hope that a team leader would have some interest in teaching a man to fish. Instilling core values and bonding techniques. Good communication isn't about favoritism, it's about keeping synergy in the line and preparedness for when the stakes bring pressure Most leadership is focused on keeping the company lean. Motivating it's members by challenging their ego. Obviously people are going to be enthusiastic about scoring more money. All I'm saying is that manhood should involve significant bonds between you and your fellow man. In addition to keeping the core ethics of what it would be like to assume responsibility when it becomes your time. You're going to have to be around other people in pursuit of that aim. But what's most important is what kind of enabling factors remain once the chief is gone. Will the core maintain or will they fall apart and tear at each other's throats the moment he leaves?

@@ramblincapuchin9075 that sounds like bullshit. You can make sure to hire the right people, and fire people that aren't doing their job properly

When some doors close, others open. Be ready for the next opportunity. But take the time to analyze why the new leadership didn't like you. What could you have done to improve your relationship with your leadership? Take the lessons learned from this experience and apply them going forward.

@leifbabin1512 this is the hardest thing to accept about the philosophy your company promotes- learning that just because something bad happened to you (getting fired), it doesn't mean it was your fault, but you can always learn and grow from an experience and do something about it. Which is difficult to hear (for me personally, at least) because I have often preferred to just be pissed and sad in non-productive ways instead of acting

Sometimes people have narcissism and other toxic personalities. Also, some folks want their people to be in their new company. Not folks they don't know. Many reasons. I would try to just move on. Folks are particular in the business world and its hard to change mindsets.

I can tell you why they lied. They dont want to admit to employment security that they had no valid reason, so they make something up and hope you dont file for unemployment and dispute their bullshit. I got fired 1 day after giving notice for family medical leave, no reason given. Spoke to HR and they admitted it was unethical and against the law. Sued and all management involved were fired. They are better off making up some bullshit excuse.

Damn that's bs

It's really hard to screen before hand, but I get don't keep people around that don't fit.

We all need to be reminded of these things from time to time.

Exactly. They are talking about this like he is a shift supervisor at Wendy’s.

Thanks for watching.

Right on. Keep getting after it.

Might feel good but sure as shoot ain’t the way. Otherwise that’s how every conflict would be approached. But I understand the feeling though. Sure can relate 😅

Probably jealous of you. Some people have marked narcissistic traits and they can't hand that other people may have more knowledge than them.

I have a boss who turned on me for reasons I'm not entirely clear about. It's tough. On one hand I wanted to confront him about his micro aggressions and bad vibes, but I know he'd only gaslight me and deny it, so I figured, it was better to say nothing, rather than give him the satisfaction of knowing that he got to me. I'm happy to play the long game with this chump. Luckily he only works at the same site as me once or twice a fortnight these days, so I'm tighter with the people I share an office with everyday than he is, so when he does come to MY office I definitely feel like I have a home ground advantage.

I'm not gloating, but I've left places because I was placed in an unfair work split and the business crashed, but that's not my fault that the rest of the team did not care enough to complete the jobs necessary for success

We are working to spread the message. Thanks for the encouragement.

Such a manager exists?!

It's also the same if you're a man and you're married to a woman.

Not always

And shouldering that blame with humility is what earns you the respect of your peers and your team. That sort of respect is hard to come by, and deeply undervalued in today’s cutthroat corporate environments.

Nah. That’s not how leadership works. It’s not a blame vs gain equation.

That’s only true if you have the military funneling people to you 😂 yeah nobody is irreplaceable to the government, they have trillions of unearned stolen tax dollars, they inflate the dollar, they use force to gain compliance, and there are thousands that grow up wanting to be there

Fatter? Or, muscled? Either doesn't mean squat. I've met dudes who were on steroids and buff as F who couldn't fight their way out of a paper bag. So, size isn't indicative of being knowledgeable on fighting tactics. I've met big dudes without an ounce of confidence. Fat ones... duh! But the muscular types, too.

@@whomeye2168 So if you're a bully, are you going to pick on the skinny guy or the man who looks like he will stuff you into a locker if you piss him off?

Nor does it start and end with men. Women are every bit the same way in the same situations. Many times, they're worse.

​@@tetedur377I'd say men are worse... You kinda expect women to be catty but the amount of bitchassness in so many of the men these days makes your blood boil.

said de most NPCest "person" in utube