Thanks for sharing your journey with us!

Good Girl! 👌 Incidentally, are you VEGAN? 🌱

Thank you ❤

My favorite of her books is “Fail, Fail Again, Fail Better”. I found it a beautifully soft one-two punch to the ego.

I may add that she enabled the sexual abuse of children, shamed the victims, protected the abusers and then didn’t take responsibility for it and still doesn’t…so much for that Fierce Grace or whatever.

An International Treasure !!

​@@susydyson1750Yes, thanks for correcting that...truly an International treasure 🎉

So is so special. Thanks for sharing!

​@@ravenwild5184 🐟 25. THE ROLE OF FEMALES: Women are fortunate because they are BORN with a job: Daughter. Wife. Mother. Females normally have no role in public life. Exceptions to this rule are relatively rare. For instance, women may work in the arts (singers, actors, and dancers, which often demand female players), or as maids or nurses, both of which are feminine duties, providing it has no detrimental effect on their PRIMARY function, as daughters, wives, and mothers. So, a female’s fundamental role is to serve her MASTERS (any man in her family circle), even from a relatively young age, by performing domestic duties and raising her children. Barren women (heterosexual or otherwise) are extremely unfortunate, but can still devote their lives to serving their husband, father, grandfather, uncles, or in the event that none of those men are extant, adult male cousins. Studies have shown that the more a woman deviates from this innate societal function, the less she is fulfilled. The phrase, “Cat Lady”, says it all. As a general rule, women should be protected in the home, and never wander-out alone. They should FULLY cover their bodies in the presence of post-pubescent males outside the family circle. Even the prostitutes in some nations wear veils in public, even if out of fear of reprisal. Having lived the eremitic life of a monastic priest for a few decades, I can attest to the importance of keeping one’s home clean and tidy. It is obvious to me that housekeeping is very much a full-time occupation, and that if I were to neglect my domestic chores, my health and comfort would greatly diminish. As would be expected of a person in my position, I follow a strict diet and am obsessive in regards to hygiene. Without a spouse, the onus is on me to maintain my residence in a prim and proper manner, even though it results in me spending less time teaching religion as a member of the Holy Priesthood (The World Teacher, in my particular case). Therefore, the role of a housewife is of PARAMOUNT importance, and must never be discounted by anybody, particularly feminist ideologues. The following chapter deals with feminism. The ONLY reason I have resided alone for most of my adult life is due to the fact that there is a severe scarcity of decent women in my country, and indeed the entire world, what to speak of holy and righteous women. Unfortunately, few women, particularly in the more affluent nations, any longer receive adequate training in the connubial arts. In my former marriages, I was forced to perform most household chores. In recent centuries, due to various factors (FEMINISM, in particular), women have become so degraded, that is it practically impossible to find an example of an ideal woman. Therefore, in order to reference examples of such a woman, one is forced to refer to figures from ancient myths. Mariam, the mother of Lord Jesus Christ, and Devī Sītārānī, the wife of Śri Rāja Rāma, King of Ayodhya, are the epitome of womanhood, and ought to be the role models for each and every girl born on this planet. That is assuming, of course, that those two women were, in actual fact, the gentle, refined, humble and submissive goddesses they were portrayed to be in the archaic scriptures. Obviously, this teaching receives an ENORMOUS amount of scorn, contempt and derision from a certain proportion of women (and also many "men"), but that is perfectly fine, because, such foolish feminists are destined to die lonely and alone, with no family surrounding them, and hopefully not transfer their adulterated genes to forthcoming generations. In some locations in the world, STRAY COWS freely wander the urban streets, displaying their teats. Similarly, in most locations, women wander the dangerous streets alone or in groups, displaying their bosoms and other bodily parts. Such loose women are no better than STRAY COWS. The TRUTH is very difficult to accept, right, Slave? “Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the TRUTH.” Siddhārtha Gautama (AKA The Buddha), Aṅguttara Nikāya 3.131 (Paraphrased). Paṭicchanna Sutta “...encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be self-controlled, chaste, good managers of the household, kind, being submissive to their husbands, so that the word of God may not be discredited.” ************* “Yet women will be saved through childbearing, provided they continue in faith and love and holiness, with modesty.” ************* “Women should keep silent in the churches. For they are not permitted to speak, but should be in submission, as the Law also says.” St. Paul of Tarsus, Titus 2:4-5. 1 Timothy 2:15. 1 Corinthians 14:34.

Great great Master showing herself as a simple nun. She is simply amazing , humble, wise❤❤❤❤ thank you so so much

Love this.

You have your own north star 🌟

She's the best.

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Yes. First real lesson in my own spiritual learning was indeed personal responsibility. Thanks 🙏

Wow, thank you for sharing your story.

Absolutely 💯 perfect!! So exquisitely and directly said! ❤🎉❤🎉🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤

That was practicing MLK's non-violent approach, that he got from Ghandi. Yeah, it's powerful.

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We agree!

I agree. It does no one any good to put one's self last. I burned myself out on that. Got very exhausted & came down with all kinds of chronic woes. Now I'm highly agitated & turning into a bitter old hag, griping & lashing out in explosive anger. It's very hard to be kind when you feel physically, mentally & emotionally tortured. I was a big- hearted, sensitive giving & loving human being who was taking care of everyone but myself.

We are all on the journey of figuring it out! Thank you for sharing your own insight, we truly value it.

@@lynne3989 Buddhism is said to be the Middle Way. I find that altho that is a philosophical stance based on samadhi realization,, holding both relative and ultimate views of reality simultaneously, still, on the ordinary level of ordinary reality, it is also the Middle Way. Sometimes we have difficulty seeing which way that is, but when it comes to a point like this, it does NOT mean that you put yourself last. "If Momma ain't happy, nobody is happy." So self-care and self-understanding is important from the beginning. That is what meditation is, self-care.! Joy just comes out of contentedness with the inside and the outside appearance. You can't help others if you haven't taken care of your own trips first. Venerable Ani Pema speaks of this when she speaks of staying still and just relaxing into it. Being still, listening, staying steadily at the heart center and moving out from there. I have also found it very helpful sometimes to yell "Fuck you!" with all my righteous indignation! into the listening silence of the empty living room! Then I feel fierce and capable and I can't help laughing . The ridiculousness of situations just breaks open. The appearance of the moment and my stance in it disappears into laughter.

I think core to this concept of taking care of someone is that our person ecology is taken care of first with establishment of strong boundaries. The boundaries don’t need to be so strong that they are reactive. But when our personal ecology is well-maintained by ourselves, we know what we can give which does not deter from ourselves and we know what our boundaries are which is a part of we know what we can give.

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dhamma: the Pāli cognate of “dharma”. However, in this case, it invariably refers to the teachings of Gautama Buddha, rather than the eternal law (“sanātana dharma”, in Sanskrit). In this book, it is used in the former sense, that is, of “holy and righteous concepts and deeds”. Therefore, the term “Buddhist dhamma/dharma” is somewhat nonsensical, since dhamma/dharma is fundamentally non-sectarian. Despite being the most atheistic human being to have ever existed, I often PRAY that I am not in the process of consuming a meal whenever I hear a Buddhist monk or lay teacher referring to his or her lecture as being a “dhamma talk”. If you have carefully read the entirety of this Holy Scripture, “F.I.S.H”, and you have listened to many Buddhist sermons, you may have already guessed the reason for my fervent prayer. This is because the assertion that the overwhelming majority of Buddhist monks are teaching authentic dharma is so excruciatingly cringe-worthy and laughable, I am genuinely fearful of choking on my food upon hearing such silly claims! First of all, the founder of Buddhism himself, Siddhārtha Gautama was hardly a paragon of virtue, having abandoned his family in order to become a mendicant monk, being an animal-abusing carnist, and encouraging females to become loose women (so-called “nuns”). In my half a century of life, I have only ever encountered one or two Buddhists who adhered to (actual) dharma, so in that sense, they were factually SUPERIOR to Gautama himself! For instance, the abbot of the largest Buddhist society in my homeland, Australia, believes that it is dharmic (legitimate) for men to insert their reproductive organs inside the faeces holes of other men, and of course, like his idol, Gautama, he is a murderer of poor, innocent, defenceless animals, and a filthy feminist. Furthermore, despite being an indigenous Englishman, and a graduate of one of the most prestigious universities on earth, University of Cambridge, he is entirely unable to coherently speak his native tongue! Should not a supposed “spiritual leader” be an exemplar in at least his own language? Of course, no human being (including so-called “Avatars”) who has ever lived was morally perfect, but those who claim to be spiritual masters ought to be beyond reproach in respect to their own ethical practices. In the aforementioned case, Gautama should have returned to his family as soon as he understood the immorality of his actions, just as I, when I began adhering to dharma, repaid two persons from whom I had stolen goods and cash. Furthermore, assuming that Gautama was really a carnist (and knowing the typical diet of Bhārata, it would be safe to assume that he was at LEAST a lacto-vegetarian, and therefore an animal-abusing criminal), he was certainly sufficiently intelligent to understand that it is unnatural for an adult human to suckle the teats of a cow or a goat, and that human beings are fully herbivorous. Otherwise, how could he possibly be considered a member of the priestly class of society (“brāhmaṇa”, in Sanskrit) if he was not able to even comprehend some of the most basic facts of life? Make no mistake, carnism (see that entry in this Glossary) is a truly abominable, horrendous, wicked, hateful, evil, immoral, sinful, demonic ideology, as is feminism and unlawful divorce (in the case of Prince Gautama, the abandonment of his wife and son would be considered an act of divorce). When a so-called Zen Buddhist priest asks another MALE so-called Zen Buddhist priest (as occurred in a video interview I just watched on the Internet), "Do you and your husband have any kids?”, one can be fully assured that the lowest point in the history of humanity has been reached. The fact that both the aforementioned so-called priests are American men, is not coincidental, since the most decadent religionists seem to be of Western/first-world origin. I don't believe I have come across a single Western Buddhist monastic who is not at least slightly left-leaning (“leftism” being a common term in the English-speaking world for “adharmic”).

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Yes I concur whole heartedly - great interview. Very generous (from each other), much gentleness with strength, Loving, deep insight, honesty, wisdom and so very humorous too!! Thank you 🙏 xx

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That book was epic for many of us!

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Humor is such a precious gift of hers!

I'm a huge fan of Pema's perspectives! To me, what's great is that she IS a mere mortal - just like Buddha was a mere mortal, and as are we! And the fact that mere mortals are capable of cultivating such awareness - is powerfully exciting! ... and challenging.... ...and loving... 🌟❤🌟

Yes!

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Sending you good thoughts.

@lisahinkover2085 Yah, I get this. This is a chronic condition that is destroying you, bit by bit. Being that you haven't taken that vow, I do not see why you should be putting up with this damaging way of life. And, this type of Vow would not apply in your situation anyway. Your living situation is vastly different from what she is talking about in this interview. She took the vow in order to HELP others, and (apparently) if that means she may need to temporarily put their needs above hers, then so be it. But TEMPORARILY... For instance, if someone is insulting her, she may feel a need to react instinctively by sinking to their level of behavior. But she doesn't do that- because of 'the vow.' So, it is in this way that she is putting her needs aside, (to react unkindly toward them), and in this respect she is perhaps helping them to realize that (for instance) they are loved, or that they are being heard, or that they come to realize there is a better, kinder way interact with others. Yiur situation,OTOH, is vastly different. Your situation is chronic, not acute. You are unable to remove yourself from the situation because these people live with you. You are NOT acting in a professional capacity in order to help these people. In fact, they are not being helped in this situation. They are being aided by you to continue on behaving badly toward you with no consequence. Even those who are 'mentally unstable' can and SHOULD learn to behave civilly - if they don't want to suffer adverse consequences for their behavior. They need to know that their actions have consequences. You are teaching them otherwise by doing nothing about their chronically bad behavior, at the expense of your own peace of mind. (Your avoidant behavior with them and 'trying to be as pleasant as possible' is not helping them.... while, indeed, it is damaging you.) You've mentioned ADHD in your comment - and also 'mental instability.' Just know that ADHD does not equate to mental instability. I would strongly suggest that you seek professional help for your situation - with some type of therapy. You need professional, therapeutic support. There are many avenues open to you in thos respect. Idk your situation, whether you can find a resource for help thru your health insurance. Or if that is not a viable resource, then through community outreach. Start asking around, or Google for a resource. There is psychological therapy available online, and over the phone. One I am aware of is called 'Better Help.' Good luck to you...wishing you the best😊

What if you try to gain clarity in your own mind about what you really want in this situation - patiently, without self-judgment? Do you want those people to realize how much they are hurting you, how much you are putting up with it simply because XYZ...? Do you expect them to change? OR do you simply and without any ill feeling toward them, want them to leave because that's what you really need right now? Thinking "what would they do without me, I am all they have got, they are helpless without me" is also ego, you see 😊 It's assumptions. It's ego's attempt to keep a self-image intact, at the cost of your peace and happiness. You are tolerating them out of pity perhaps, your concern isn't even coming from an authentic place right now perhaps. Inauthentic love - mere good manners out of fear of consequences, and authentic love - all encompassing... there's a vast difference, ain't it?

No, you don't expect them to change. We can't change anyone - just ourselves! (Refer back to the section on being a doormat in this talk. ) Make sure you set healthy boundaries. Love them. And LOVE YOURSELF. Having them move on and out could be the very act of self love that you need. And it could be a major piece of your spiritual development that you're here to lean in to! There must be some reason you've all chosen to be down here together at this time, with a wide range of conditions! They are part of your curriculum! And maybe part of your spiritual life challenge in THIS life, is to LOVE yourself, and to stand up for yourself. You are beautiful - and strong - and courageous! And right now, you need to look out for YOU - with no apologies. ...and you're so worth it! 🌟❤🌟

@@ShellBAtoms Thank you for your wise words. One of these two people who was living with me left. I asked her to leave and gave her a thirty day notice. She’s gone. I feel a great relief and I have my life back. As for the other person I have decided to help her get back on her feet and we have come to an understanding so things are so much better.

We'll share if we find it!

We appreciate your insight!

Always ignore narcs.

Pema talks about being present, not pleasant, in the face of insulting people. Might that make a difference?

@@dinaweeda8868 Makes sense. Thank you.

...and they can be some of our most profound teachers! I've had some very challenging relationships with narcissists - and in the end, I learned how trust in myself, and stay peacefully in my truth, while letting others be in theirs. You do have to set boundaries - Loving boundaries - out of self love. There are lots of videos on youtube about how to deal with a narcissist. You can be present with them - with no obligation to be pleasant. Present, and nonplussed. At peace in yourself. ❤

Thanks for sharing!

For me, I often think of the karmic lessons others are here to experience, and that sometimes how my 2024 current lifetime brain interprets something - probably has a very different purpose in someone's karmic curriculum. This is just one of many lifetimes - each with a different set of challenges. I try to have grace with myself and others - knowing that we're all in this for lifetimes - and some lifetimes have a certain experiences that fulfill that life's purpose and lessons. We're NOT MEANT to see the big picture while we're in Earth school! We're intentionally given past life amnesia! That's how we best do the work in each Earthly incarnation! ...unitl we TRULY come to the understanding that we are all one ... and I am you .... and you are/am I.... ...and all living being go back to our one true source.... ❤

Thank you for sharing.

I wish for you to stand proudly in the strength and courage you have right now! No one can take that from you! You loved your kids enough to take them out of a bad situation! Some women don't have the courage to do that! YOU DID! What a big heart you have! It doesn't sound like you should be doing compassion work with your ex at this time. Rather, immerse yourself in setting healthy boundaries for you three. Note that the healthy boundaries you set for you might be a bit different than the healthy boundaries for the other two. But you - in particular - deserve the peace that comes from setting healthy boundaries. You are a hero! You have liberated three people from a harmful situation - because you KNOW you all deserve to be safe and happy. You are a remarkably courageous and loving soul! And thanks for sharing your strength and courage with other women. You are an inspiration! - maybe post some affirmations around you, and refer to them often - that you are STRONG and COURAGEOUS! You have immense love! Proceed with your head held high! I'm dedicating some of my spring flowers to you and your immense love and courage! I am personally inspired by your strength! THANK YOU!

Strikes me it's about time that to normalize these kinds distinctions..

41:46 how to remember? Well it all shows up in the way in which the world occurs for you...

42:51 let's digress ten million times

Good stuff!

Everything is better in a Tom Waits voice!

Think she'd use a Buddhist lightsaber?