Jon * Reaches for handshake * Michael in the background: "That was incredibly stupid."

Georgie: WHAT HAPPENED?! Jon, cradling his newly crisped hand and scowling: I socialized.

Woman: it won't hurt •has burned people before •has talked vigorously about large burns •has no obligation to tell the truth Mr paranoia himself: well guess I might as well.

So like, these people have the ability to burn others to a crisp, Mike can FLY, Micheal can basically teleport, and all our protagonist gets is the power to make people overshare? This is ridiculously unfair.

_The audience is only safe when the story isn't about them_ I feel threatened

Jon: HoW dO i FeEd My GoD??!!! Also Jon: Can't. Stop. Recording!

How many scars can Jon get before he just fucking dies?: The podcast

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Jude:"You wouldn't shake my hand" Jon:"No I'm not stupid" Jon later in the episode: I guess I am stupid

For all the Observing he’s supposed to be doing Jon’s sure never seen a braincell in this life

.... The more I listen to these, the more I understand why in DnD Intelligence and Wisdom are two very different things. Jon might have a really high intelligence stat, but his Wisdom is abysmal. He has no concept of self preservation.

'Maybe you get an itchy eye or something' I SNORTED the shaaaade

Some highlights from the transcript for this episode: [SOUNDS OF DEMONSTRATIVE SQUELCHING] [NOISES OF A HORRIFIED ARCHIVIST] Thought I'd share this delight with y'all. Things in this podcast: I could kill, y'know. Jon: /sassy stare/ Things: ...Or I could just tell you about my life. It all began when I was 5 and mommy sent me to my room without dinner.

will someone PLEASE hug jonathan the poor guy is having a rough time

I hate how everyone's saying Jon is stupid bcs he puts himself in dangerous situations to gain knowledge, I'm only up to the current episode but I'm pretty sure that's the sort of vibe the Eye is supposed to have, it's that kind of reckless romanticism that gives him his character

hearing jon scream hurt me a little inside the fact that i identify so much with martin certainly didn’t help that

jon- ah yes i didn’t shake her hand earlier because she will burn me, obviously, i’m not stupid! jude- it won’t hurt jon- oh okay! i’ll shake it right now then.

She sounded so turned on, when she talked about burning things/people, it's really creepy. And Poor Jon gained some new scars I guess

When Jon asks questions, it forces people to answer. It’s hilarious. Or it claws at them.

it sucks that u have to be an evil psychopath to get cool superpowers :(

Worm Wife, Spider Wife, now Fire Wife.

The soft calliope music in the background is suitably unnerving

jesus christ someone give this poor man a pamphlet

Guys. Look. Jon knew he was probably gonna get burned. But he was gonna get the info he wanted or die trying.

I’m sorry but “the audience is only safe when the story isn’t about them” is somehow a really, REALLY cool line to me.

"Fine, keep your secrets"

"My girlfriend..." Another win for the Lesbians folks

The Lightless Flame must be having a ball in 2020, so many wildfires, so much destruction...

Everyone's saying how Jon made a stupid choice to shake her hand, but while its definitely not a smart move in terms of personal safety, I can’t help but feel it’s there to show the lengths he’ll go to (or is compelled to go to) to find out more information, not a comment on his lack of brain cells.... Anyway, loving this show like crazy, can't believe I'm so late to the party!

I love how he’s just like OH MY GOD SHUT UP EDGELORD

her laughing while Jon says his usual statement opening is a fantastic detail - also uhh Jon??? ffs be more careful

Agnes is awfully nice for being the leader of a bunch of murderhobos

Jude: C'mon... It won't hurt. Jon, internally: Right. Er-- she's probably going to kill me if I don't, considering that I hurt her feelings and she's simply letting me go off with a third degree burn. Could be worse

Great, now Jon has scars from two of these enteties. Sure hope he doesn't keep collecting them...

I feel like Jon gets partially offended on behalf of the eye when she said it's useless

That was eye opening.

Oh. The picture is becoming clearer. Jonathan continues to make rash, impulsive decisions and to hurt himself in the process. I guess he's hungry for information. You know, Willow from Don't Starve? This is how I imagine her talking.

4:50 "My dad could beat up your dad!"

I went to bed listening to TMA and forgot to set a timer to stop it after half an hour, you don't know fear until you wake up to the handshake scene at 2am.

Everyone here railing on Jon for having no braincells (not saying that's _untrue_ ) and shaking her hand, but given the context of this episode it makes perfect sense. If Jon compelled it out of her, she made it clear she would kill him for real, but more importantly, he's always subconsciously followed her advice to serve his god "fearlessly and without hesitation", to retrieve vital knowledge even at the expense of his hand or even his life. His near lack of hesitation to shake her hand was just him being a faithful servant, with a side of charming dumbassery of course. Honestly this might be one of my favourite episodes so far. The writing is always stellar, but this one felt more impactful and beautifully tied together.

i love her voice omg. also "my girlfriend" aaaaaa i got vibes from her and i was right edit: jfc the handshake

so many michaels, so many characters have so similar names, guys, MAgnus archives your stories are complicated enough already you dont need that extra added name ambiguety

i love her voice but please someone help jon.

Y'all. I'm pretty sure he recklessly finds information and has a need for information because of the eye and- oh OOH SEASON 2 MAKES MORE SENSE NOW

23:20 'I lied🥰' she's so funny. Even if she is traumatizing Jon

cmon jon why would you believe her shes,, a fire woman who likes setting people on fire. why else would she want to shake your hand

hearing jon scream like that made my blood go cold

Someone should really give Jon a hand

It’s kinda funny listening to Jon try to make sense of his god

First worm injuries, then got stabbed by a butter knife, and now, he left his hand in a toaster.

I don’t know why, but the scream both hurt and was hilarious, on one side it was a character I’ve grown to like in extreme pain, but on the other hand it reminded me of Mike Wazowskis scream

Lady's completely unhinged

Damn, this one made me really sad. The guy in the statement died like a dog and was framed as a criminal, which I think is even worse. Imagine leaving your wife and child and they think you were doing shady stuff... :(

Holy hell jude is terrifying, that "i picked the man who had the most to lose" bit made my skin crawl. Also rusty quill making trading bankers the villains that they are gives me life ❤

Gotta love it when I have the audio turned all the way up in my headphones to hear the lady and then Jon screams into my ears lol

She literally just called him the lamb to the slaughter. Of all the insults and threats Jon's enemies have shoved at him, I think this one wins

Jude Perry talks fast in almost every first sentence of a paragraph

"Laughs like a headache" got me dead

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Crying. "It wont hurt". "Fine i guess". And that perfectly cut scream. I laughed so hard

Geogia when he gets home and refuses to take his hand out of the paper bag👀👀

her voice reminds me kinda like an English version of Azula. Matches up with the evil crazy fire lady too

*I FELL ASLEEP WHAT HAPPENED* *LAST THING I KNEW I WAS NEAR THE END OF 85 AND I JUST WOKE UP TO JON JUST FUCKING SCREAMING?????????*

"The audience is only safe when the story isn't about them"

Jude: hard to tell degrees.. Jon: ³ʳᵈ ᵈᵉᵍʳᵉᵉ ᵐᵃʸᵇᵉˀ

fire woman: *speaks* me: *HELLO I AM LESBIAN*

My god John I knew you had bad survival instinc but WOW WHY DID YOU SHAKE HER HAND

Jonathan doesn't seem confused by his compulsion ability, but I don't remember it being mentioned in any previous podcast. Is he just innately aware? I mean if I got burned asking a question and asked to stop "compelling" I'd be right confused and asking questions, but Jon seems to know what he's doing.

Nooo jon that was a really bad idea..

Jon: give me your statement Jude Perry: *gets burny* Jon: *frodo memes* alright then, keep your secrets

Perry?.. Perry the Arsonist?!?!!

" *I lied* "

The casting is so stupidly good, the voice actress of Jude has absolutely the most sulky, sexy and deadly voice i have hear. Is just fits so perfectly well with her theme of burning destruction. Also John is sticking with his high int low wis build till the bitter end uh?

that scream is up there with blindspot from the boys for the most realistic and painful sounding screach ive heard in fiction

Ah yes, my favorite character: Jon "I will shake the hand of a burning creature made of living flame" SIms

I want to give Jon a hug SO BADLY, it is NOT FAIR that I can't. Like, I've _been there_. Not as in "served an eldritch god-thing", obviously, but as in "I'm new to this". As in "I have just figured out that I am (a/n) _____, Now what do I dooooo?" And yeah, sometimes, in those cases, the people you turn to for advice are not the best choices. This episode makes my heart hurt in the best possible way.

~23:20, headphone warning

This is my first listen, I have a panic disorder, and I fell asleep during this episode until Jon startled me awake with his screaming 😭 My half asleep ass thought the clowns got him lmao

watching Jon openly not investigating her mention of his powers MuLtiPLe TimES still ended up playing second fiddle to the pain of listening to him decide to shake her hand????? bro I know you're not that stupid that's some suicidal angst ya got there m8

I WAS WEARING EARPHONES LISTENING TO THIS AND NOW THAT SCREAM AT THE END KILLED MY EARS RIP

Jude Perry: Shake my hand Me: Don't do it Jon...... I'm about to hear screaming, aren't I

I see a lot of ppl saying Jon’s stupid for shaking her hand (and I agree) but I also felt like he couldn’t refuse her or else she’d would just do something worse idk He’s certainly stupid enough but I wanna give him the benefit of the doubt

Honestly, the scariest part of this episode was Jon screaming then it cutting off abruptly.

Jon; "Alright, keep you're secrets!"

Jon walked RIGHT into that one XD [i also make a couple coworkers jump when i laughed at the wax part]

this woman literally made me feel sick in the way that she speaks, she felt like she could not be trusted the moment she spoke... dang these people are great at voice acting! also people say there's an episode for everyone, this is mine i guess. this single conversation sent shivers down my spine, and a pure disgust that reminds me of that time i watched Dr. pimple popper for half an hour (my mom watches it and i wanted to see how long i would last)

also everyone talking about fire wife™. let us not forget door husband. the laughing legend himself.

Nah cuz I was so happy when I looked at the title cuz I'm afraid of the dark but damn I didn't expect some Lightless Flame action 💀

"fine then, keep your secrets" _screams in Frodo fan_

Wait, when did Jon realize he served the Beholding again? I knew it was gonna happen but I don't recall it ever being explicitly stated till now....

Jon's screams continue to be the scariest thing in this podcast. -_-

“Stop that!” Oh that change of tone ffs

How many Michaels do we have in total? 4? There has got to be more names in Britain than Michael.

Me, late at night, really quiet, just catching up on the story, nearly falling alseep Jon: 23:19

My theory from this episode and what we know so far: I liked this episode. Mostly because it gave us more info about why the entities mark some people. I've stated before that I believe they target either people who are really afraid of or people who are really fond of the things that the entities are about. From Jude's statement we can understand that, when someone is fond of things of a specific entity, the entity is drawn to them and the person can either feed that connection and, thus, become part of the entity, or don't feed it which means get scared from it and become food for the entity instead. So, Jane Prentiss, Michael, Jude here, Elias, that girl from the metro episode that survived and then would leave dirt everywhere she was, Agnes, these are all people who were fond of things that had something to do with an entity and, because they accepted their fate and gave in to it, they became a part of it instead of just victims, while others who couldn't stop being scared, died. That makes me be a bit scared about John's future 'cause, as Jude warned him, he has to either feed the need or be consumed by it. Also it makes me wonder, how many of the witnesses from previous episodes are actually still alive now or were hunted down by the entity they were marked and killed after their statement was given. It's funny how Jude was about to give John info about the whereabouts about someone possibly dangerous for him and John was like "Ah, him? Yes, I know him already. What, no spirals? Then what, ozone smell? Yeah, I know that one too" :P It has been a while since we last heard of Michael Crew, so I'm intrigued to hear what he's being doing now, and also with which entity he's connected and which entity was hunting him in the form of a lightning creature. But, with what we know so far, things point to him being linked with the vast entity, since also the Fairchilds (I couldn't remember their surname last episode) are working for the vast entity. Finally, John has once again gained a mark by an entity. I wonder if there is a reason for that..

i might have a type... psychopathic fire ladies. for example: Azula, Jude Perry, Burnscar... and when i was little i had a 'fascination' with Peril from the wings of fire books...

everyone calling jon stupid for shaking her hand, but your not seeing that refusing the shake when shes stated shes already been offended would probobly have resulted in much worse

oH GOD THAT ENDING

Her name being Agnes reminds me of Agni अग्नि, the Sanskrit word meaning "fire", and the Vedic Hindu god of fire, reflecting the primordial powers to consume, transform and convey. He is one of five, the others being Prithvi/Bhudevi (Sanskrit: पृथ्वी:, Earth), Apas/Varuna/Jala (Sanskrit: आपः, Water), Vayu (Sanskrit: वायु:, Air), and Akasha/Dyaus (Sanskrit: आकाश, Space/Atmosphere/Ether)

voice acting top notch as always! now to scribble down hand burn on the list of scars this man has so i can identify him in fanart..