Sustaining desire in a long-term relationship | Dr. Petra Zebroff | TEDxSurrey

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Sex therapist and researcher, Dr. Petra Zebroff, describes the four ways to increase sexual desire and reconnect a sexual spark in long-term relationships. The natural and gradual decrease in sexual passion is one of the most common complaints for sex therapists. After extensive research, which included more than 10,000 survey participants and helping hundreds of couples reconnect, Dr. Zebroff describes how “low sexual desire” may not be what it seems. Find out which of the four ways of sexual initiation works for you and your partner to get turned-on. Petra Zebroff, has been an avid student of human sexuality for over 25 years. First as a PhD student, then learning from clients as a sex therapist and now with sex research.
After founding, Libida, the first women’s online sexual magazine and community, Petra went on to write for popular magazines and websites such as Psychology Today and focuses on sex research and innovation to understand the areas of sexual initiation and eroticism.
All through that journey, there has been one common thread, and that is - what lights people up sexually. While the majority of sex research and therapy emphasize the problems of sex, Petra has focused on what ‘works’ sexually, specifically what sparks up the erotic part of the brain.
For the last decade she has surveyed more than 10,000 people and worked extensively with hundreds of couples in long-term relationships, to answer the question, “how do I get that first-time spark back?” This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

КОМЕНТАРІ: 100
@anasquadri7919
@anasquadri7919 Рік тому
We need more talks like this.
@MultiSuzy13
@MultiSuzy13 Рік тому
Lovely to be able to see your talk Petra, great job and you were amazing!
@allicedee
@allicedee Рік тому
Yeah after 2-3 years I felt the "spark" leaving the "game". But it came back, sadly only for me and not my partner, at 6 years around. Few years later it ended for the better. You only know if you are compatible for life, after you lose your Spark.
@JaeNiece55
@JaeNiece55 Рік тому
Thank you👍🌹. Wow! That was a big eye opener 👍👍👍
@tentanghukumkita6381
@tentanghukumkita6381 Рік тому
Sustaining desire in a long-term relationship Thanks for explanation.
@Lifeofsharmaji_
@Lifeofsharmaji_ Рік тому
It's a spark that one should keep between them always one should try things with required amount of time after all it's relationship it's about keeping it throughout your life ❤️🌍
@simplysunmoon
@simplysunmoon Рік тому
Very interesting topic, thanks for sharing would be nice to have more talks about that ❤️☀️🌙
@text2324
@text2324 Рік тому
ᴛᴇxᴛ stephen' ʜᴇ's ᴀɴ ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴏʀ ±𝟏𝟐𝟎𝟗𝟗𝟖𝟗𝟏𝟓𝟒𝟖 ʀeɢᴀʀᴅɪɴɢ 🅑🅣🅒 ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴍᴇɴᴛ ɪᴅᴇᴀs, let him know we referred you..
@bukurie6861
@bukurie6861 Рік тому
Thank you!Interesting to hear a theme to this nature!👍
@treyweeeee
@treyweeeee Рік тому
This is an amazing talk I love the idea of communication with your partner. Too bad rvw is going to hurt so many lives.
@dustykappus8030
@dustykappus8030 Рік тому
Thanks for sharing, a lot of factors play into it, and the physical mental and spiritual
@sicosico3426
@sicosico3426 Рік тому
Really helpful
@theolgasperezshow
@theolgasperezshow Рік тому
I talk about this all the time. It is my passion. Thanks for sharing!❤
@text2324
@text2324 Рік тому
ᴛᴇxᴛ stephen' ʜᴇ's ᴀɴ ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴏʀ ±𝟏𝟐𝟎𝟗𝟗𝟖𝟗𝟏𝟓𝟒𝟖 ʀeɢᴀʀᴅɪɴɢ 🅑🅣🅒 ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴍᴇɴᴛ ɪᴅᴇᴀs, let him know we referred you..
@datchinogreentgod420
@datchinogreentgod420 Рік тому
NOT EVERYONE WANTS TO KISS FIRST!!! - DAMN THIS TRUELY HAS BEEN A GREAT MESSAGE TO MY EARS N BRAIN!!
@iamgoddessoflove
@iamgoddessoflove Рік тому
When you realize that holding onto pain is so much greater than the pain of removing a toxic person out of your life, then you know that it is time to let go. 💙UKpostsr That Helps People Overcome Toxic Relationships
@NathalieLazo
@NathalieLazo Рік тому
The more we work on our own selves, the better we attract, in this case, a better partner and a phenomenal relationship. There’s no such thing as the “right person” (to an extend) we have to become the right person first! You got this, I believe in you and invest into YOU! Best investment you can ever do is in yourself for your family, others, future and lives overall! 💯% back guarantee return on your investment! Have a great day! 🚀🎉❤️
@frufrujabenderps5300
@frufrujabenderps5300 Рік тому
this works folks!
@JCVarkey
@JCVarkey Рік тому
Very good advice!
@NathalieLazo
@NathalieLazo Рік тому
@@frufrujabenderps5300 Thanks for sharing!
@NathalieLazo
@NathalieLazo Рік тому
@@JCVarkey Thank you Jay!
@bfcbrad69
@bfcbrad69 Рік тому
Where do i find this Qtip questionnaire ?
@user-gk6rl4yu6i
@user-gk6rl4yu6i Рік тому
영상감사합니다ㆍ솜결
@UnconditionalTruthKilluminati
@UnconditionalTruthKilluminati Рік тому
It certainly helps if you have a gal that looks like the good Dr. Petra as the days go by, but actual commitment should be the eternal spark. Material stability, limerence, impulsiveness, societal pressure, and/or obligation("accidental" pregnancy...etc) should never be the foundation of a relationship that's expected to last. The days of survival dating are gone and hypergamy should be reclassified as a mental disorder. When Love becomes the only reason people are dating instead of relieving anxiety and fear? Alot of these issues will become rare rather than a societal norm...
@text2324
@text2324 Рік тому
ᴛᴇxᴛ stephen' ʜᴇ's ᴀɴ ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴏʀ ±𝟏𝟐𝟎𝟗𝟗𝟖𝟗𝟏𝟓𝟒𝟖 ʀeɢᴀʀᴅɪɴɢ 🅑🅣🅒 ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴍᴇɴᴛ ɪᴅᴇᴀs, let him know we referred you..
@marie-christinerondeau3017
@marie-christinerondeau3017 Рік тому
Very interesting talk! Where can we take the q-tip test?
@fillo1762
@fillo1762 Місяць тому
You can search it up on google
@giftedgreen2152
@giftedgreen2152 Рік тому
I retired from dating at 40. One of the best decisions I ever made.
@Devanshu2406
@Devanshu2406 Рік тому
Can you please elaborate on that, I respectfully want to know more !!
@justinatkinson5265
@justinatkinson5265 Рік тому
Well that is a lie. If It was the truth you wouldn't be here commenting lol
@giftedgreen2152
@giftedgreen2152 Рік тому
@@Devanshu2406 birthing people don’t get better with age. I got sick of the look of shame from birthing people who looked 10x better with clothes and makeup on.
@irenesturk7283
@irenesturk7283 Рік тому
So how do you bring eg. sentiment and surrender together?
@myparceltape1169
@myparceltape1169 Рік тому
It might be Want.
@LarryP248
@LarryP248 5 місяців тому
This content stands as a testament to insightful and profound thought. A book with related material was a significant influence in my life. "The Art of Meaningful Relationships in the 21st Century" by Leo Flint
@millig8980
@millig8980 Рік тому
Very good topic although you forgot to mention a very small factor which destroys erotic brain: Toddlers. Two boys in my case 🤣🤣
@sihlemanana862
@sihlemanana862 Рік тому
This is why I don’t want kids
@lifebeginswithaseed
@lifebeginswithaseed Рік тому
@@sihlemanana862 There's an upside to kids too. They are a blessing. I definitely was not a kid person b4 I had them. They change you in which you become selfless and actually care for the future(I actually started paying attention to politics and law making) They give you an opportunity to grow and give you joy that can only come from being a parent. It's like living life all over again seeing things through their eyes. The amazement and wonder over the simplest things. It's a beautiful experience.
@sicosico3426
@sicosico3426 Рік тому
@@lifebeginswithaseed 100% true
@Spectrumix
@Spectrumix Рік тому
captivating presentation , does anyone know where this questionnaire is?... asking for a friend🤫
@text2324
@text2324 Рік тому
ᴛᴇxᴛ stephen' ʜᴇ's ᴀɴ ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴏʀ ±𝟏𝟐𝟎𝟗𝟗𝟖𝟗𝟏𝟓𝟒𝟖 ʀeɢᴀʀᴅɪɴɢ 🅑🅣🅒 ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴍᴇɴᴛ ɪᴅᴇᴀs, let him know we referred you
@SJerseyfishhead
@SJerseyfishhead Рік тому
I've given up. It's less stressful.
@mrevol8454
@mrevol8454 Рік тому
I thought it was Helen hunt in the thumb nail
@text2324
@text2324 Рік тому
ᴛᴇxᴛ stephen' ʜᴇ's ᴀɴ ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴏʀ ±𝟏𝟐𝟎𝟗𝟗𝟖𝟗𝟏𝟓𝟒𝟖 ʀeɢᴀʀᴅɪɴɢ 🅑🅣🅒 ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴍᴇɴᴛ ɪᴅᴇᴀs, let him know we referred you
@orwell_fan
@orwell_fan Рік тому
For any guy, man reading this comment, go read or hear the book "The Rational Male" from Rollo Tomassi. This will teach you a lot of women, and how to keep Genuine Burning Desire aka "the spark" women feel for a man. Thank me later
@text2324
@text2324 Рік тому
ᴛᴇxᴛ stephen' ʜᴇ's ᴀɴ ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴏʀ ±𝟏𝟐𝟎𝟗𝟗𝟖𝟗𝟏𝟓𝟒𝟖 ʀeɢᴀʀᴅɪɴɢ 🅑🅣🅒 ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴍᴇɴᴛ ɪᴅᴇᴀs, let him know we referred you..
@user-el9sg5ns7p
@user-el9sg5ns7p Рік тому
Где перевод?
@user-yp4nm3os8f
@user-yp4nm3os8f Рік тому
1-2 years!😆
@susanridenour9758
@susanridenour9758 Рік тому
One and four
@beppobarrendero74
@beppobarrendero74 Рік тому
Second
@susanridenour9758
@susanridenour9758 Рік тому
I need to hear the choices again. Plus, it's been a long time since I've had an intimate relationship
@maha_19991
@maha_19991 Рік тому
اتمنى توضعون ترجمه الكلام 🥺
@champfisk5613
@champfisk5613 Рік тому
People get tired of things they have access to overtime. Think of that brand new car that you no longer covet after 2 years and that brand new cell phone that you no longer baby after 2 months
@text2324
@text2324 Рік тому
ᴛᴇxᴛ stephen' ʜᴇ's ᴀɴ ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴏʀ ±𝟏𝟐𝟎𝟗𝟗𝟖𝟗𝟏𝟓𝟒𝟖 ʀeɢᴀʀᴅɪɴɢ 🅑🅣🅒 ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴍᴇɴᴛ ɪᴅᴇᴀs, let him know we referred you..
@Chickadeebunny
@Chickadeebunny Рік тому
I’m not sure why “the spark dies” for so many couples. I know for a fact, personally I remain just as passionate as I was for them as I was in the beginning.
@Jay-ef2ii
@Jay-ef2ii 4 місяці тому
Hotter chicks are one reason. Many men are visual creatures. December 31,2023. USA.
@schelliegris7481
@schelliegris7481 Рік тому
2 and 4 at the moment
@text2324
@text2324 Рік тому
ᴛᴇxᴛ stephen' ʜᴇ's ᴀɴ ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴏʀ ±𝟏𝟐𝟎𝟗𝟗𝟖𝟗𝟏𝟓𝟒𝟖 ʀeɢᴀʀᴅɪɴɢ 🅑🅣🅒 ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴍᴇɴᴛ ɪᴅᴇᴀs, let him know we referred you..
@sadiakhan6449
@sadiakhan6449 Рік тому
Second
@SachinYadav-vc7zm
@SachinYadav-vc7zm Рік тому
What is second
@beppobarrendero74
@beppobarrendero74 Рік тому
Me too
@Jay-ef2ii
@Jay-ef2ii 4 місяці тому
SPECIAL COMMENT: You as the man must have awesome chemistry to begin with so your relationship with your Woman does not fade away. You too (as the man) must be more beautiful than the Woman so she can listen to you. The man must have awesome chemistry! He too, if possible, must have Chemistry and Looks so all can roll well with the Woman. "The World is messed up love wise for the man who does not have any chemistry with a hot woman" December 31, 2023. USA
@halilibrahim4830
@halilibrahim4830 Рік тому
erotic Brain is on our heart.
@knaw35
@knaw35 Рік тому
Interesting. Many advisers “how to live” recommend special techniques. They talk about points, steps, lists, types, etc. They are even ready to tell you what is important and what isn’t. Forget it. You are not a machine. Just try to understand who we are in perspective of millions years of developing. What is conscious, what is unconscious. Why we do something we know is wrong. To live a proper life is easier and accepted by society. But we don’t. Why? Read Carl Jung, listen Jordan Peterson, Douglas Murray and similar. Find out who you are. Understand yourself. Finally you will not need any technique how to turn someone up. It will be a part of your complex knowledge about the world and you.
@text2324
@text2324 Рік тому
ᴛᴇxᴛ stephen' ʜᴇ's ᴀɴ ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴏʀ ±𝟏𝟐𝟎𝟗𝟗𝟖𝟗𝟏𝟓𝟒𝟖 ʀeɢᴀʀᴅɪɴɢ 🅑🅣🅒 ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴍᴇɴᴛ ɪᴅᴇᴀs, let him know we referred you
@wolfofmind8
@wolfofmind8 Рік тому
Immortal😂
@johnmatthewbriones3447
@johnmatthewbriones3447 Рік тому
First
@text2324
@text2324 Рік тому
ᴛᴇxᴛ stephen' ʜᴇ's ᴀɴ ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴏʀ ±𝟏𝟐𝟎𝟗𝟗𝟖𝟗𝟏𝟓𝟒𝟖 ʀeɢᴀʀᴅɪɴɢ 🅑🅣🅒 ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴍᴇɴᴛ ɪᴅᴇᴀs, let him know we referred you..
@palesamalodi
@palesamalodi Рік тому
Third 😂
@text2324
@text2324 Рік тому
ᴛᴇxᴛ stephen' ʜᴇ's ᴀɴ ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴏʀ ±𝟏𝟐𝟎𝟗𝟗𝟖𝟗𝟏𝟓𝟒𝟖 ʀeɢᴀʀᴅɪɴɢ 🅑🅣🅒 ɪɴᴠᴇsᴛᴍᴇɴᴛ ɪᴅᴇᴀs, let him know we referred you..
@Proud_to_b
@Proud_to_b Рік тому
any one is here who want to practice English?
@emmahill7305
@emmahill7305 Рік тому
Despite the economic fluctuation, I’m so excited I’ve been earning $45,000 from my $10,000 investment everyday 10days.
@Jamesscott-cr4zt
@Jamesscott-cr4zt Рік тому
Same here, I started with $2,000 now earning $18,300 bi-weekly profits with her trading program.
@nkemjikachris-ken328
@nkemjikachris-ken328 Рік тому
She's really amazing i still cannot believe someone can be this exceptional when it comes to Bitcoin activities.
@Dalio906
@Dalio906 Рік тому
Yeah I'm a living testimony of Expert Angela Cole Carr her strategies since February is enormous.
@beuladegraffenreid4210
@beuladegraffenreid4210 Рік тому
I know Angela Cole Carr . She obviously brings a lot of experience in trading to the table but more importantly I think she is a tough person in an industry that demands clairvoyance.
@beuladegraffenreid4210
@beuladegraffenreid4210 Рік тому
@Alisha Gomez She is always active on what-app APK
@hempisnotpot4112
@hempisnotpot4112 Рік тому
The best way to do it is to keep bringing in younger women to the bedroom to share - he's already had u so
@skypinkidol
@skypinkidol Рік тому
I’m sorry that you believe this is true
@usernotfound5857
@usernotfound5857 Рік тому
Try laying off the hemp / pot / whatever you're on
@hempisnotpot4112
@hempisnotpot4112 Рік тому
You said it, you’re sad, hence the need for younger variety, you cant beat nature, younger its on every man's bucket list... this will never change, it dont matter how wonderful or accomplished , young skin will always be desired over anything else
@Skeletal33
@Skeletal33 Рік тому
Youre so full Of it. Hows your mom doing? Does she clean your room?
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