It’s astounding how Fez in the closet is represented as just silly when in reality someone hiding in my closet/home and spying on me is an actual nightmare.

Even as a guy who's usually not the subject of them, these kinds of scenes have always made me incredibly uncomfortable. The idea of me looking out of my bedroom window or shower door and seeing someone just...staring at me is one of my greatest fears. I honestly think one of the most damning pieces of evidence against this trope is that, with literally just a music change, a lot of the scenes wouldn't seem out of place in a horror movie.

Megamind actually parodied this when Titan/Hal said he had his eye on a special girl; Megamind and the audience initially assumes he means this metaphorically, but then the shot zooms into the female lead's living room where she's working, and we realize he spying on her. It's framed as gross, villainous thing to do, which I haven't seen in any other superhero media.

Had two coworkers at an old job pass around a phone with nude pictures of a girl that one of the guys was sent. When I told him not to hand me the phone, his response was pretty much "your wife will never know" as if my refusal to violate another person was only because I thought I'd be "in trouble" if I did.

Just imagine how hard it would be to keep hetero male audience members sympathetic with a gay male protagonist, if he started spying on the boy next door.

As a girl who was terrified for years after she caught a 40+ year old man watching her through her window when she was 14, I'm glad you brought up the lasting psychological effect this can have on women.

The "performing" section addresses something that always gets to me: that in nearly EVERY Peeping Tom scene, the woman is seductively sauntering around her apartment, performing a striptease for nobody. I want to see a scene where a guy peeps on a girl, but she's just sitting on the couch in sweats watching TV, then she catches him and presses charges and never speaks to him again.

Steve Harrington calling out Jonathan, destroying the photos and the camera was the turning point that made me say 'wait I thought he's supposed to be the mean jock'. It made me love the character, especially how he develops into nicer and more respectful with every season.

i REALLY appreciate that you directly said that the fault isn't on women who're spied on (or whose intimate photos are shared), but the people who spy/share the photos. i was recently telling someone about an incident where a woman's long-time husband posted intimate photos of her online. it RUINED her career, even made it into news articles. my discussion partner replied, "well she shouldn't have taken those photos, that speaks to her character." please to the younger generations, help this mindset die and remain buried.

The interesting thing about the role reversal of the peeping tom is that whenever the girl does it, it IS portrayed as violating and uncomfortable for the guy. Like that scene with Moaning Myrtle and Harry, we the audience aren't being directed to leer at Harry, we're expected to understand how uncomfortable he feels about it.

There's a really great example of a male character respecting a woman's privacy in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, where one of the male characters tells a woman she should take a bath if she wants and that he won't look. Not only does he not spy on her, he sings so that she can feel comfortable knowing where he is at all times during the scene...

This is a HUGE problem in South Korea for women actually. "Molka" or hidden cameras are a huge thing in Korea that it's very paranoia inducing for women to use public facilities like bathrooms or changing rooms etc.

"Because men's sexual attention is always supposed to be flattering. Regardless whether or not those feelings are reciprocated." Thank you for making this video. I learnt stuff the hard way but my younger self would have really needed to hear these critics.

Thank you. When I was growing up we had a peeping Tom, the cops knew about him, but treated him like he was an annoyance, harmless. Scared the crap out of me a couple times. Just watching TV and suddenly there's a man's face in the window. Then he started exposing himself. We called them "flashers" back then, there was even a whole couple years when "streaking" was a thing, so, haha, it's funny, right? Not to a 12 yo girl it's not funny, it's terrifying.

I caught a 40+ years old man nodding and smiling at me while I was changing in the back seat of my mom's minivan. I was literally going from karate practice to ballet practice. It still fucks me up when I think of the sinking feeling I had. I was only 8, but I knew it was messed up.

As a teenager I was worried about being undressed in my own room without the blinds tightly drawn or my back turned from the window for fear of someone nextdoor looking in because of scenes like this. Now I'm a 20-something who is often read as a woman living in an apartment and while I have no one directly across the street from me and I know it's hard for someone to look into my window, I still worry about "putting on a show." Hanging around in one's underwear is just a casual thing when male characters do it, but it's an intentionally sexual act when female characters do it. That sticks with you.

Want an example of the harm this trope has? I and many women I know feel the fear of being spied on all the time. We check unfamiliar bathrooms, hotels, or B&Bs for cameras. We don't sleep in a room on the ground floor, and keep our bedroom windows covered almost all the time. I even hesitated to have plants in my bedroom, because that would necessitate keeping a window partially uncovered a lot of the time. It's so far from "harmless."

One thing that I appreciate about this channel is that it doesn't really feel the need to be funny. Don't get me wrong, I love funny video essays that can use gallows humor when covering heavy topics. But I also appreciate that Pop Culture Detective can hold your attention without jokes and just say, "This is important and we're gonna break down why." Direct and well done, as always.

The fact that there are so many KIDS movies that have these kinds of scenes is sickening. The normalization is built into us from such a young age.

It really says something about the industry that you were able to cut together well over 20 minutes of footage, without repeat, of this problematic trope.

16:47 "Men dream of women. Women dream of being dreamt of" is so telling about how society views women's sexuality. Instead of being equal in this situation ("women dream of men"), women's desire is passiv and completely dependent on men's actions. I'm not saying, that women never want men to dream of them, but the complete exclusion of an active sexuality just grinds my gears. Also: not mentioning that this of course excludes any sexuality that is not straight.

Quite disturbing how you were able to find a seemingly endless amount of clips for the video. Made me realize how often it’s used and how desensitized I’ve become to seeing it over and over. Great analysis as always can’t wait for the next video.

I also think it's interesting how you never see someone actually getting dressed like you do in everyday life. Usually the dressing up/down scenes are performed like a sort of strip tease.

I think the worst part about it is like, in the "Don't Peak" scenes, the man involved is usually the protagonist right? And he's a friend/acquaintance/peer of the woman. He's supposed to be the good guy, a FRIEND, and yet he still peaks. It honestly just makes me feel like, who can you trust to not peak? To not invade your privacy?

I like how PCD's video is like: "Here's a problem." and public might say: "Nah you are exaggerating." and he'll show a enormous montage replying: "I'm not."

You had the clip from Scott Pilgrim vs The World briefly, and I realized that's the only film I can think of in which a character comes upon their crush changing clothes and immediately apologizes and covers their eyes. Plus the character changing, Ramona, is not doing a sexy pose or framed in a sexual way while topless. I think it's funny because in the rest of the movie Scott is framed as a bit of a jerk in some ways, yet even he clearly knows that "peeping on someone is wrong."

This is a minor point, but it always struck me as ridiculous how the women being peeped on in these scenes are always wearing sexy underwear. In reality you're lucky if my bra matches my panties. Women aren't all Victoria's Secret models all the time.

I hated how Jonathan's photos of Nancy was just looked over in stranger things and Steve was painted as the bad guy for calling him out. Like Jonathan is a creep and Nancy should never have given him a chance romantically

In Stranger Things Steve Harrington did nothing wrong when he broke Jonathan's camera. It was a perfectly reasonable response to break the tool he used to take pictures of someone undressing without their consent.The fact that the show frames him as a douche for doing it, yet excuses Jonathan's actions with some BS about how he 'sensed her loneliness' has unsettling implications.

Peeking can come in so many forms. Like when Megan Fox was delivering her first speech in Transformers and later found out that her face wasn't even shown, camera went straight to her body. She was shown only from the main hero view, not as an individual person. Even though she wasn't naked, it's still very disturbing

It's mostly telling how that peeping is almost always sexual. Imagine a 90's teen comedy where the guy climbs into a tree with binoculars to see The Girl being beaten by her dad because he's drunk that day? OOPS, guess you weren't that interested in her actual secret life.

There's definitely a reason you get horror films/psychological thrillers made out of the female POV of these scenes

I would like to once again shout out Megamind, where the one character doing this is the villain, and very much portrayed as being a creep, and the camera doesnt actually show the female character in any compromizing way.

The term "teen sex comedy" explains a lot about our culture

16:15 “Now don’t get me wrong, sexual curiosity is completely normal. However, nonconsensual behavior should *never* be confused with healthy sexual exploration. The default should always be an expectation of privacy.”

The fact that you featured *so many* examples of the "Harmless" Peeping Tom just goes to show how normalized it is! 👀

It's really sad that women are groomed to expect this kind of stuff. I've known a lot of young women that live in constant anxiety because of the thought of not looking good publicly (Normal stuff when it's the only thing you're rewarded for). Imagine having those reparations even in the privacy of your home. I remember Jane Birkin saying she slept with an eye pencil under her pillow so she could apply it before her husband woke up. Truly horrible.

This brought me back to a moment in high school I totally forgot about! I was in a band with two guys (I'm a girl and my bandmates knew I dated girls) and one of my bandmates showed us a video he took of his naked girlfriend and I was like "eww wtf why would you show us that??" and he looked so confused about why I wasn't into it. I totally forgot about it, but now I see that he was trying to win social points. Guess he thought I counted as one of the dudes since I like chicks. Now I wish I had indicted him harder about the lack of consent instead of just saying that it's weird to show people pics/vids of your naked girlfriend lol.

As a teen girl who has experienced this TWICE w the camera from two different boys who were supposed to be friends i couldnt help but cry about this video bcos its SOOOOOOO violating

the most telling thing about this entire video is that there are *so many* examples of this in pop culture that you were able to fill almost 30 minutes of them

Your point about the trope of “well, men just can’t help themselves” is so important. It so closely connects to the “what was she wearing?” question around rape and sexual assault as if men find it physically impossible to resist their urges if they find a woman attractive. It does such a disservice to men as well as women to have them seen that way

happy to have you back! gotta say it's disturbing how common this trope is, and how it's painted as harmless. notable how the women who supposedly don't know they're being watched are directed to move and act in a very "sexy" way too. Crazy how some parents and men are saying Turning Red in inappropriate for children or have too specific of an audience just because it addresses periods or crushes, when these movies aimed at boys show these kind of creepy behavior towards women. I grew up having to see these types of moments because they appear so often in media despite it feeling wrong, and I also felt bad for not looking like those women. scary stuff

"It does cause harm. It chips away to your victims until they crumble to nothing. It dehumanizes. It steals away their rights to days free from worry." -Witch Hat Atelier.

„Women‘s bodies must always be available to men, to be evaluated…“ I think what really adds insult to injury in these scenes for me is: Real women and girls, we‘re gross. We‘re just as gross as any other gender. Because we’re human. Humans are gross. We‘re not robots or dolls that always smell and look pretty. And obviously, we‘re especially gross when we‘re feeling comfortable alone in our homes, for once not being watched. But in these scenes, the women are always moving and undressing in the most sensual and pretty way possible, when they‘re supposed to be at their ‚most private‘. Stuff like this can really mess with your head. Like we’re not even allowed to be ‚not pretty‘ when we‘re alone. I feel ashamed of myself sometimes for simply being comfortable at home and not pretty and prepared for any potential or imaginary onlooker. The thought of being watched at my most private seriously makes me feel more ashamed of myself than creeped out or enraged by the person looking.

It would be so easy to make the changing scenes consensual too. Character A needs to change. Character B looks away. Character A says "it's ok you can look" . Now the scene plays out exactly the same but it's not creepy and invasive anymore

Again, quality! The frustrating thing is, as a woman when pointing out things in this vein, we are labelled as b***** or told we have no sense of humour, or that we read too much into something, or are nazi feminists.

I was only around 6 or 7 years old when I first learned of peeping, because my male friends spied on me changing at a pool party. I was mortified and they begged me not to tell anyone so I didn't. Bringing it up a few years later when we were teenagers those same boys denied ever doing it despite how clearly it had stuck with and affected me. I have no idea why 7yo boys already had the idea to do that.

A former girlfriend once found a man looking at her through her open bathroom window and she was incredibly traumatized. Ever since then, I get very uncomfortable and tense when "peeping tom" scenes come up in movies and TV shows, despite what the creators of those works want me to feel.

Glad u showed the new Batman - the juxtaposition of the riddler spying on the mayor in the first shot of the movie and Batman spying on catwoman felt so odd!

As a woman in her mid-20s, I'm still shaking the feeling of putting on a "hot girl performance," even alone. I've realized I've got an audience of men in my mind that I'm always subconsciously trying to please. Sickening! Thank you for your beautiful videos!

Wow, as a female watcher these scenes made me so uncomfortable. The thing is, a lot of these movies you mentioned came out when I was a child and a teen so sitting in a full cinema or with Male people at someone's house, you feel kind of helpless. Because "it's a compliment" when a man peeps, and "women like to be stared at". As you said, it gives off a false image of entitlement to a woman's body and I think it might be the cause why catcalling on the street is occuring so often without any great consequences. It's so refreshing to see that it's starting to change and that voyeurism is being pointed out as something negative. Thanks for your research and time!

15:29 "...she left herself unguarded a few times..." It's messed up that women even have to put up a guard. It's like the woman's body is seen as a castle to be sieged, seized, and raided.

It's definitely one of those weird tropes that flies under the radar. Rarely have I seen media address the difference between accidentally seeing someone nude or in a vulnerable manner and then making an active effort to look away and respect their privacy, versus what is usually displayed as discussed in this video. Really good video.

My favorite part about your video essays is that you reframe the examples with the same cinematic language that originally attempted to normalize them, and the result is that we cringe at scenes while laugh tracks fall flatly in the background, utterly stripped of efficacy. It's brilliant.

Even in girl‘s locker rooms we look away when someone else undresses/turns around to undress. The lesbians don’t look either so what businesses do men think they have to be sexual predators?

the objectification runs so deep- in every scene the women are always undressing slowly and with care to be attractive to the viewing audience. even if it isn't directly stated that the woman wants people to look at her, it is indirectly implied by the fact she's undressing so performatively. when every example of women's secret inner lives is shown this way, it enforces the narrative that women are expected to be attractive always. I know for sure it's not hot when I'm tugging off my bra after an 8 hour shift.

we're always shown how peeping is important for boys' coming of age, but never how it's damaging to girls. of course, boys "having fun" is much more important than girls being treated with respect. 🙄 that's a perfect example of the film industry being a male dominated field, and them presenting the world from their point of view - how they wish events would play out.

I’ve been rewatching the Suite Life of Zack and Cody and there’s an episode where the boys accidentally make a hole in the hotel wall that looks into a room occupied by a bunch of young women, and the boys use it to spy, and end up making more holes inviting their friends to spy too. The girls in the room do catch on and end up poking them in the eye, and their mom does give them a lecture on why it’s wrong, but the punishment is still very light and it really plays as “silly boys being boys”

funny how you mention it being an 'assumed part of a young man's sexual awakening', because it made me realise that I'd seen this trope so many times growing up as a girl, from a young age, that it was completely ingrained in me. I assumed that was just.. true. I assumed I'd be spied on, watched, and that every man/boy did it, and enjoys it.

I always close my laptop, flip my phone over, and tightly shut the curtains whenever I'm changing out of a sincere fear that someone might be watching - certainly not for any vain issues nor the belief anyone would "want" to see me, but from how much media has perpetuated the idea of people spying. In the same way, I always check around a hotel room for hidden cameras. I don't want to call it paranoia since it doesn't rule my life in the same way, but there's always that small seed of doubt that someone might see something.

It's also hugely popular in anime. If there's an episode where characters go to a public bath or hot springs, there's a very good chance there will be a scene of one or more "good" male characters doing their best to peep on the girls and it's just used as a comic relief moment.

'Even pretending you aren't catering to male fantasies is a male fantasy: pretending you're unseen, pretending you have a life of your own, that you can wash your feet and comb your hair unconscious of the ever-present watcher peering through the keyhole, peering through the keyhole in your own head, if nowhere else.' - Margaret Atwood I've often wondered if the male gaze style of camera work, combined with this trope being so relentlessly common in media, really messed up entire generations of people exposed to it. I don't know if young boys growing up felt pressured to normalize it, being shown so often that it was apparently both harmless and expected of them, and I'd love to hear if any men watching have any personal anecdotes relating to this; But as a girl growing up, even in the middle of the countryside with no other houses around, and my curtain drawn, I felt like I was being conditioned to expect being watched, and it still messes me up sometimes today

I had a friend (now acquaintance) once show me a nude photo of his wife on his phone and I was horrified. He even asked if I had pictures of my wife to show him. I made it clear that this was not going to happen, and that I was uncomfortable with the suggestion. I have no doubt he's shown those pics to other people and that his wife does not know.

These kinds of scenes always made me feel so angry, disgusted and violated from the time I was a child. The sheer number of examples that he was able to show in this video just speaks volumes about how this has yet to really be seen as a problem. Thank you for calling out the bullshit and showing me that I'm not "over-reacting."

in highschool, my least favorite place was the women's locker room. ive always known i was a lesbian, but i struggled (and still struggle) with a gut feeling that my existence is inherently predetory to other women. in the locker room, i would go out of my way to make sure i never looked at anyone else in the room, but i felt that me standing in the room was a violation of everyone's privacy. i never once had the urge or the desire to see other girls half-naked. if i ever accidently saw someone, i would immediately look away and curse myself for the rest of the day. movies where the protagonist peeps on a woman are both extremely uncomfortable and baffling to me. in no possible circumstance would i actively choose to do something like that, so i cant even understand why anyone would. and scenes and plot points like that open the wound again for me, as i feel inherently predetory for even watching the scene. i really hope that, at some point in my lifetime, that those scenes and plots die out and become reworked.

I was waiting for Cabin in the Woods. It's the only time I've ever seen a character clearly tempted to peep but decides not to, and then realises the temptation is too great to resist so they remove the temptation by telling the other person and fixing the situation. It made me really like his character, which says a lot because in real life his behaviour was baseline human decency, not something special.

I was spied on as a kid by and older boy across the street. The guy’s dad found out and went to tell my dad about it, told him he caught his kid looking at me and I need to close my blinds, change with the light off, stand away from the windows so his son wouldn’t be able to look anymore, etc. My dad told the guy to fuck off and that his son was the problem and not me, so I didn’t need to change anything about my behavior. He didn’t tell me till about ten years later. When I tell people this story, a lot of times people question my dad’s decision - Why didn’t he tell you so you could change in a way that was private? the guy across the street could have been - and probably was - still watching, so in many people’s eyes, my dad didn’t “protect me.” I’m so glad that my dad made the choice he did. If he had told me, and told me to change my actions, yes, maybe my body wouldn’t have been looked at anymore, but the implications that my body is up for grabs and free to be seen unless I take precautions to protect it at EIGHT YEARS OLD would have fucked me up for a long time. The knowledge that someone was watching me like that as a child is still troubling, but at least I was never told I needed to change anything about my behavior to keep men from taking advantage of me. It’s never the victim’s responsibility.

You brought up the paintings in passing, but that's where the male gaze was born. Women have always - *always* - been depicted by the gaze of men since the beginning of artwork that they're featured in. It's no question that a sexualized perception of women found it's way into modern media, since art has long shown women in compromising, nude, or outright sexual situations. Look at Venus and Adonis, Cupid and Psyche, etc etc - most paintings of them showcase the women naked and the man clothed. It's not until the reality of the male gaze is brought up so starkly that you notice it. It's why I love your channel so much - you work hard to make videos that starkly bring up these issues and shine a light on them. Huge respect for using your platform to dismantle and discuss these tropes, themes, and tactics. Another great video!!

You’re right on the nose with this one! Another thought I had regarding this trope is the way it contributes to woman’s internalization of the male gaze, which is then redirected towards our own bodies. Atwood described this phenomenon really well when she said “you are a woman with a man inside watching a woman. You are your own voyeur.” I think this media trope especially totally contributes to this - it teaches woman that even our private moments are for the male gaze, and creates the sub conscious need to always perform male fantasies.

The overly exaggerated creepiness of Fez is definitely tied to racism by the way. I think it's important to mention that as well.

The vast majority of the work on this channel should really be included in sex ed curriculum. It's just so well done and if I ever have kids, I'm going to be so relieved to have such an effective tool to give them when they reach the age where questions of sex and consent start crossing their minds.

I felt disgusted and disturbed watching all these clips. "To perform sexy when there is a chance that male is looking" is kinda have been engrained in my brain until I watched video on similar topic and started to realise that I subconsciously do that sometimes. It's an important issue to talk about, so thank you for bringing this up.

I'm so glad you mentioned the whole "rite of passage" thing because I've always been uncomfortable with stories that include this, especially the ones where they make the actress consensually flash a boy. There's a scene in a show called Impastor where the main character convinces a woman to show her breasts (and also touch them? I don't remember, I ended up timeskipping that part) to a small boy as a favor and that shit has always made me so uncomfortable and grossed out since I was a kid.

I was recorded during a sex act without my consent while I was in high school. It is until this day one of the most traumatic things that has ever happened to me, and even though it has been years since then, I cannot think about it without getting anxious and wanting to cry. It's nice to see people talking about it. Let's speak about how fucking shitty this attitudes are. Violating privacy is not victimless.

I always felt like the peeping Tom trope was just a way to validate men's fantasy that women WANT to be looked at. But it's even more disturbing when it's broken down further 😬

A lot of directors have also lied to female actors about what would be shown to to be able to get the ‘shot’ they want without consent. (Sharon Stone one of the most famous examples of that). Or the actor is in a position where they don’t feel they can set boundaries without repercussions either with the current role or their future career. Forced consent. Thank you so much for these videos.

I've always found that whole "Turn around!" subtrope especially odd. You'd think someone in that situation would sooner say "Hey, could you leave the room for a bit?" I mean, I get _why_ they do it that way; these scenes only exist as an excuse for some peeping action, and having the peeper-to-be leave the room would make that more difficult. Still, it's an odd contrivance.

I would like to add to the video what could be called the "boyfriend perspective" : when a man __ brother, father or most times boyfriend of the victim __ finds out she's being watched and goes after the peeping Tom. Very often this character is meant to be a rival or an obstacle for the protagonist. While when the boyfriend IS the protagonist, the peeping Tom is presented as creepy and dangerous and is the antagonist in many thrillers or horror movies. Men and boys in movies seem to all have that mentality of « I can spy on every girl i want but you better not spy on MY girl/sister/daughter ». The exceptions to that is when men deliberately share pictures or invite other men to spy along with them : this trope is used in many media, like 13 Reasons Why and Euphoria, to demonstrate to the viewer that the guy doesn't personally care about the girl or have feelings for her specifically. To him she's just one hot girl among many others. When a guy has a crush on the girl he's spying on, he usually doesn't allow other guys to spy along. In conclusion, women are again depicted in movies like the property, gratification, goal or purpose of one man, or several men competing to get her. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk, i hope it was understandable, English is not my native language.

My brother once caught a peeping Tom when he was in his late twenties,he was absolutely mortified.He moved to another apartment that same week.

This discussion just jogged a memory for me. When on a camping (in cabins) trip in high school, a friend and I were late getting to the main lodge for a meeting of the whole camp. While rushing to get there fast, we cut past the male teacher cabin and accidentally came across one of the teachers coming out of the bathroom stark naked, passing in front of the open window. Since it was pitch dark outside, he couldn't see us. We both immediately shut our eyes and fumbled to get the hell out of there as fast as possible, and made an agreement to never, ever mention it to each other or anyone else. We were both female teens. The teacher was a fit, attractive man in his 20s, but not for one moment were we tempted to peep. However, had the genders been reversed, society would have expected, and even encouraged, us to continue peeping and to share the story with others.

“The young boys gain confidence through the act of non-consensual looking” I feel like it’s important to emphasize something here: they don’t gain confidence in themselves. Real confidence in yourself is something that comes regardless of whether you have or don’t have power over other people. What they’re gaining is a sense of power, because they have learned to reduce the woman to an object whose boundaries don’t matter. They’re not gaining the ability to see themselves as worthy and equal, they’re gaining the ability to view women as lesser. It seems important to note that the object of this voyeurism is often a female character who has been portrayed as overly independent, bossy, a feminist, or prudish, (Jackie from that 70s show is bossy and prudish, Donna is overly independent, for example) and the looking is viewed as bringing them down a peg. It’s a literal “the empress has no clothes” moment. I think this really reflects the way coming of age is viewed for men in real life. Girls go from something to be afraid of to something that’s been defeated, and many men perceive that as a change in self-confidence. In actuality, their confidence is as unstable as ever, subject to change the second a woman asserts some form of dominance over them, or even when they PERCEIVE a woman as having asserted some dominance over them, regardless of whether that was her intention. This leads to a shameful rage that engenders a need to retaliate so they can put the woman back in her place. The mark of toxic masculinity as opposed to healthy masculinity or self-confidence is that its only foundations are built on the subjugation of women or “lesser” men and it collapses as soon as those foundations are challenged. Sorry for writing a whole tangent in response to one sentence, I’m sure OP knew all this already but didn’t have time to fit everything in. Tl;dr: coming of age stories having non-consensual looking is a harbinger of screwed-up self-image.

This trope really added to my anxiety growing up, actually. I remember being a tween and finding that a window in the guestroom at my grandma's didn't have blinds, just white curtains that billowed in the breeze, and I ended up always changing on the ground behind the bed so nobody could see me if they wanted to. That's a weird thing for a kid to be doing, and it's an unfortunate thing for a kid to be afraid of.

You made a great point about nude photos in media. It is so uncomfortable when you watch a show and a character's nude photos are leaked and they show the explicit graphic image. It's so unnecessary and makes you the viewer complicit in the Peeping Tom act. Something weird about this trope too is that most of the time the image shared is of a "teen" character

As a young woman, I feel awkward watching sex scenes, and the "harmless peeping Tom" just makes me want to punch him :/

It's appalling the media normalizes sex offender behaviour like this. Law enforcement knows peeping is the first step in escalating sex offenses. It's a huge red flag for sociopathic personality disorders.

18:55 I’m glad someone pointed this out! The amount of men I’ve seen excuse cat calling by claiming ‘some women like it!’ Or ‘it probably makes their day!’ Is sickening

I was wondering if I was the only male who found this trope kinda repulsive.. I'll never be endeared to an invasive action like that no matter how harmless the perpetrator is. It's nasty and totally inconsiderate at best. I hate that it's so common too. Yes I know it's fiction, but I still feel uncomfortable as a movie shows someone being seen without consent. I can't imagine how a woman would feel seeing this as such a commonly shown thing. Basically: sorry women

For me, this has always been such a bizarre trend in film and TV. Particularly the idea of the guy sharing nude photos of a partner with his friends and it being some weird "bonding" experience. Outside of consensual situations (which I fully acknowledge do exist), I simply cannot fathom one of my friends sharing, or even describing, their partner's nude body (or really just their body in general) with me...if that ever happened, I would be seriously put off. Even when I was still in high school (Early 2000's), this wasn't a thing in any circle I hung out with. At *most* someone I know may just mention that they hooked up or got to whatever base with a girl, but there was never explicit details shared and definitely not pics/video. On another note, it was interesting that the one Seinfeld clip you included here was the one from The Contest where they saw a naked woman across the street. As bad as that is, there's another moment - that nearly makes me want to forget the whole show - where Jerry and George are meeting with the NBC executive for their pilot, and his 15-year old daughter (which they specifically call out as that being her age) comes in wearing a low-cut top while the exec is in another room. She leans over for like 30 seconds for no reason and is clearly showing a ton of cleavage, Jerry catches a glimpse and nudges George who literally just gawks at her until being caught by the exec. The cherry on top is that it nearly costs them their whole deal, but they hatch a scheme to have Elaine (an ADULT WOMAN) wear a top with a lot of cleavage and get the exec to leer at her later, which I guess makes him forgive these two ADULT MEN for staring at his TEENAGE DAUGHTER. A lot of the show has nonsensical and dicey plotlines but this one moment is just so weird and offputting... and overall it's one of my favorite TV shows of all time, so it's a shame that it decided to use something like this as a plot device.

Feel like there’s so much misogyny and sexism EVERYWHERE that it’s impossible to enjoy anything if you as a woman keep thinking about it so a lot of us have ‘acceptable’ and ‘unacceptable’ sexism when consuming media. Peeping toms are so common in shows and movies therefore it’s a part of the ‘acceptable’ side of things. I wish it wasn’t this way and I wish I could genuinely watch something and not have to see sexism in it but that does not happen so ://

So glad you pointed out that even when this behaviour is meant to be seen as creepy/wrong and the character (or characters) behind it condemnable, the people behind the camera still take the opportunity to sexualise the women being spied on. This is an issue with many depictions of SA/harassment--even if the characters doing it are villains or are condemned for their actions, the SA/harassment is depicted in a way that still allows for the titillation of the viewer (like Leia in the gold bikini).

Def like this video…I was a victim of a peeping tom, a close male friend that I look up to because they were older…i’m still disturbed by the act to this day…

"thats either the creepiest or sweetest thing ive ever heard" after dude spies on her for 2 weeks? this shit's fucking insane, how do female actresses even go through with this bullshit?

Something not touched on is that irl, these types of behaviors (namely peeping, flashing and groping) are often indicative of people who violate boundaries and in some extreme cases, rapists and murderers, who often start their careers with these sorts of “harmless” activities that society gives them a pass for (“boys will be boys”). These things are NOT normal behavior and can be a glaring sign of lack of empathy, poor impulse control, inflated sense of entitlement etc. and they may escalate to more serious crimes.

There was a time when a friend wanted to show me a nude of a girl he'd been with. He showed my other friend, they discussed it. And i was curious, but shy. He offered to show me and i initially declined but with some convincing i joined in on the "fun". Whats troubling upon retrospect, especially upon watching this video wasnt that i made that obvious mistake. It was that i was reluctant to invade someone elses privacy becuase I HAD A GIRLFRIEND. The woman i was with and respected was the deciding factor of whether or not i was going to respect another woman. It wasnt that i wasnt willing to see its thay i didnt want to make someone else mad. And Thats a fucking problem. You arent a feminist unless you respect ALL women. Including those you arent interested in, or are dating.

I was once standing at the window in underwear kissing with my boyfriend and we looked out the window to see five (5!!!) people in the same apartment across the street staring at us! We hurried to roll down the curtain, and my bf still have some paranoia about going near the window with little clothes on. It was fucking creepy, and I felt this was also an instance of the "omg gay guys are so cute!!"-objectification that I've tried before, where some people basically get heart eyes if they see my me and my bf standing together. It's weird and uncomfortable.

As a (male) child of the 80's, can I just say that your analysis of these topics is just a revelation. Thank you.

I was watching an 80s movie with my dad when I was in high school, don't remember what it was, but I know it was one he'd grown up on/was emotionally attached to. Anyways, it opens with a teenage boy climbing a tree to peep on a girl getting dressed on the second floor of her house. I, obviously, said "what the heck, that's so creepy." My dad says, "Well, she should've kept her curtains closed." ".... she's on the second floor. He had to climb a tree to see her. And she's supposed to anticipate that?? This is her fault because he went out of his way to look???" And I didn't say it at the time, but I wish I'd asked him "If a boy climbed a tree to peep at me or one of my sisters, would you have blamed us for having our curtains opened? Or would you be furiously chewing out the neighbors for raising such a creep?" And I'm quite certain that, in a real life application, he'd be doing the latter, but because he loves this movie uncritically, he didn't want to hear it. I have a brother, and I'm just glad that he didn't absorb most of our father's subtle misogyny.

I was just thinking about this trope! Because of all the backlash from paranoid parents at Turning Red for being "inappropriate", I couldn't help but think "aren't you the same generation that fawn over Back To The Future which actually has inappropriate behavior like peeping and molesting???"

Wow I really didn't expect this video to make me as uncomfortable as it did, I had to pause multiple times to get through it. I've noticed the peeping tom trope before, but I hadn't realised how prevalent it is in popular media. This was a great analysis, really made me think about how so much of what's shown on film and TV is completely romanticised.

13:32 “All of the actors involved in these productions have presumably agreed to be represented in the ways we see onscreen. *But fictional representations still help normalize nonconsensual behavior* “