this is best comment yet :)

Exactly. Refund defense money ...firing some useless pentagon leaders....or ....selling 1.7 trillion in billion dollar stealth bombers? to pay for better mental health, and education especially civics, international politics and culture and world history.

Friggin pitiful when ya put it that way. Good one!

🤣😆🤣😆 lmao

Great visual analysis and i thought similar in the 9/11 attack: how did a small terrorist group from the other side of the world do that to a so called "super power"?

Hahahahhahahahhahahaha lol

I laughed. Good job.

*"those are organic"

😂👏

🤣🤣 love! (I can’t believe he mentioned saving the snacks! What a tool!)

They are all soft in the brain, they legit thought that their actions at the Capital building would overturn an election and somehow get that orange turd 4 more years. We are not dealing with the intelligent here.

Hitler only got 9 months for high treason for the Beerhall Putsch. The judges at his trial were fanatically pro-Nazi.

And he grew up when America was great n the first place, and still decided it was wrong.

Yup. Intellectuals, first up against the wall when the revolution comes, which WILL be televised (or streamed on social media in today's parlance). So don't wear your glasses in public bcz everyone knows only nerds need glasses 🖖🤓🙌😳🥺😱.

During Pol Pot's reign of terror, people would be arrested if they were suspected to be or were intellectual. This was extended to anyone who wore glasses. The logic being glasses meant they read too much.

Isaac was a really smart guy and a great author.

I kind of like Oscar Wilde's. " Patriotism is the virtue of the vicious."

🎯

Ican't believe you didn't know that.You only served a purpose. Don't worry, he's planning to fly up to DC to get you out .Just hang on.

ikr

Chuckle...good one!

45 is still doing it. Liar liar... they are all pathetic and an embarrassment.

From the looks of him, I don't think he's lying, I think he's genuinely delusional.

I have a close family member who lies like that. Cloistered monastery, you say? Hmm, interesting.

It's just politics, OK ?

True dat! Kate wrote this I want you as my defense attorney should I need one, I like your logic!

Qanon and logic don't sit in the same car.

@@stevious7278 they don't even live in the same county

It's just a plot to get free organic food from the federal government. That stuff is expensive!

Can't call Trump for help.

That took me a few seconds.

For fuck´s sake 😂

Call yo Mama cause at least she'll respond, Pentagon has to have the right "look" before steppin out and that bish might take a while!

Wins the internet today!

@@billtomson5791 I have to wait 20 mins?

That was one of those times he was "kidding"

Yes- he did!!! They have ALL forgotten that. He says so many hideous things we do forget 95% of it. Luckily it is often him on 'video' dropping himself in it...freak!

He meant he would pay them indirectly through his taxes. All $750.

@@potaterjim 🤣

GOP: Grandstanding Opportunists and Panderers

What volumes does it speak? It’s a bunch of bullshit pandering to the left wing version of Qanon believers

@@IdiotBoxProductionsTV It speaks volumes about them having no desire to try and eliminate police brutality.

The bill failed because George Floyd was in the title of the Act. If they wanted Republican votes, the Democrats should have called it the Tactical Policing Act 🙄🤣🤣

@@TheThird1977 there is no police brutality though that’s the thing, this whole thing is completely over the top

LOL He thought it was a glorified sleepover.

He's not afraid to go to jail. He just doesn't like to be in jail :)

@@Jehty21 lol that sounds like what that guy would say if he saw the OG comment.

Feed him TONS of baloney, mayo and mustard on Wonder Bread. He has earned all those preservatives, salt, and nitrates.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

... as opposed to before? Perhaps a star-spangled cow on a ranch was in the offering before his incarceration?

As opposed to before, when he looked like a bogo Walmart version of a Frank Frazetta character

Always did.

Didn't his mom speak to press about how her sonny boy could only eat organic foods? I assumed he was much younger...

@@chandaharkins4418 all that hate must make him age more than average, just look at Steven Miller that guy's barely in his 30s and has a very high forehead...

I concur! The live audience has a lot of applause that takes some time

Plus hearing the crew on set laughing seems better than a whole audience laughing.

@@ragerancher Yes. I much prefer the honest reactions from the crew than a crowd cheering when the applause sign comes on.

And you were right!

You are giving the mind of DT far too much credit.

Straight out of the dictator playbook.

@@bagitson And you're not giving him enough. He was sowing lies about the election for months before hand. It is so implausible that those friends he installed in the pentagon would intentionally delay the response?

Well the top brass in the military knew exactly what they were doing and how to do it but Trump didn’t like it because they told him no they talked down to him they told him the truth but you don’t ever do that to Donald Trump because you will never ever continue your job. No matter how good you are or how long you’ve been in the military if you piss off Trump you will be fired in a heartbeat! Those people who served in the military for all these years lose everything They worked so hard for I hope the Biden administration goes back and reviews all of this so these people who have served this country for this long and this hard risking life and death and maybe even being wounded will get what they deserve!

This needs to be higher up.

Nice one.

Good comment...

This.

Oh, SNAP. Pertinent, and also gruesomely graphic. Did you ask him? I would.

I’ve been trading forex for a long time now with the help of Mr Carlton Jefferson and I can tell it’s very productive I think you should give it a try too

Forex is the best you can go into right now and mr Carlton has been my mentor ever since I came across him it’s been a blessing,tho I started with a little capital of $2000 which has grown into $11000 account

I trade with him for months now his trading strategy is magical and am happy am beginning to master them now

This are the kind of information we need here please is there a way do communication with this professional?

Carltonjefferson76@gmail. com

Lol good one

🎶*Girl, you thought he was a man, but he was a muffin;* *He hung around 'til you found that he didn't know nothin'...*🎶 - Frank Zappa

Nah. The true muffin-man is Dr. Bob Kelso. "Who has two thumbs and thinks your insurection is sh!t? This guy!"

👏👏👏

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

100%!!

I actually got bored and figured it out, we would get about 3/4 of the way to the moon lol

I'd go further. He should be reading it out.

Perfect!

@@akinpaws Heck no. He would take days to accomplish the task. Hire the speed talker who made commercials in the 80's and 90's, for fed-ex I think.

Hence should be called the silly buster that should itself get busted

@@markh3271 Micro-Machines

"Is dumb the same as evil in this universe?""unclear but they seem to go hand in hand a lot" - Ryan George and Ryan George, the dumbest timeline, Ryan George cinematic universe, Ryan George. quoting Ryan George's youtube skits is tight.

@@gerbenvanessen I love how many times you put Ryan George in those few sentences. "Isn't making drinking game material fit in a single paragraph going to be hard?" "Actually, it's gonna be super easy, barely an inconvenience."

If you notice, evil uses stupid people quite easily.

Wise author...

Evil only wins when good people do nothing against evil!!!

Fascists, which is EXACTLY what the GOP have become, have NO authority to tell Americans what they can or cannot have. Especially after they JUST got the SAME amount to divide among their 800 billionaire buddies. IS THIS FUCKING WAR YET, AMERICA?

do you know why 2 democrats voted nay? I honestly don't, it's not a challenge.

@Corey Aldrich build a wall

@Corey Aldrich loosen your immigration requirements? Pretty Please? I have references!

@@fatfreddyscat5767 If you won't fight fascists down there, why should we trust you to fight fascists up here?

Yes real laughter is contagious, I hate all that fake laughter BS, Stephen’s crew and wife only laugh when they think he is funny, unlike Jimmy Fallon’s crew where it is groan worthy. I am sticking with Stephen and his sharp wit.

No, its cringey and needs to be cut out. If he picked up the pace it would be a lot better.

Tony H, Live audience...?...for Colbert ....good luck....hahaha!

@Karin Meyer, 1. "normally has packed audiences"... before OR after he sold out his free thought..? 2. YT page??...hahaha!... no such thing; I'm just a citizen who calls it like it is 3. "Trump bot"...you're either a desperate liberal wonder or an idiot...just my independent digression.

Oh yes they sell the American people this pyramid scheme can you do it will take away all of that and guess what you’ll like it and you’ll take it and you’ll do it because we said so. We have pass bills we have pass laws to make sure everyone in America understands that we have more Republican judges to screw you over and over and over again! We even control the Supreme Court! So there you go Democrats we will hold up everything when we want to how we want to. Will you and hold up a session to give you Covid relief for over 18 hours just to read the bill out loud! While everyone leaves the room! The only one still there is Kamala Harris in the person reading the bill. The rest of them have gone and got dinner with restroom looked on their phones read other papers trying to figure out how they can create new laws and bills to benefit them. Where do they get those money from did they take it away from American taxpayers Social Security again! But yet we’re still going to pay tax on this $1400 we’re gonna get by losing our homes and our jobs and our insurance! Sure Republicans are the evil in control of the United States while the Democrats sit back and say please let’s just get along! Let’s not hurt the American people but we’re not gonna fight you in court we’re not gonna fight you in the Senate house and Congress! Even the president has put in executive orders and the Republicans still refuse to follow them by going to a court that is controlled by a Republican judge! But if Trump put in an executive order it was done in a matter of minutes if not done before he announced it. Trump thinks he can still get and is getting intelligence briefings when he is so financially in debt he’s going to sell all the American secrets. But He wouldn’t let Joe Biden after he was announce the winner for president to get the intelligence briefings! America who are we what are we nothing but slaves to the people in power! We have no say when you haven’t had for years maybe 100 years!

A lack of spine makes them surprisingly flexible... who knew?

@@montymonty224 I'm a retired gymnast and I could never pull of those moves. 😂

Awesome Statement! Thanks!

Right... like, if you want to make stupid comparisons for no reason, go *all in* baby... 1.9 trillion dollars in pennies could stack from Earth to the sun and most of the way back

@@JimRFF Hmmm...let's see. A 1 cent coin is 1.52mm thick, and there are 100 x 1.9 x10^12 cents in that figure, so that makes approx 288800000000000mm, or 288800000000km or 179452000318.142 miles ie approx 179 billion miles. Voyager 2 has been traveling through space for 43 years, and is now more than 11 billion miles from Earth which means that we could pile those pennies for over 500 years, to reach where it will be, then. i.e. substantially further than "to the Sun and back"! Please feel free to check my figures. Might have lost a decimal place or two in there, somewhere!

@@timbeaton5045 honestly, I just did some back-of-the-hand calculator with google; I could very well have missed an order of magnitude or two myself haha

​@@timbeaton5045 100 pennies (1 dollar) is 152 mm (15.2cm, or 5.98 inches since 2.54 cm = 1 inch). 5.98 inches is 0.4987 feet. So, to get miles you take (0.4987/5280) X $1,900,000,000,000 = 179,452,000 miles. We're still in our solar system, since Pluto is 3.7 billion miles away. In fact, we have gone to the Sun and are about 7 million miles short of getting back to Earth as Jimbo stated. I think your math got fuddled by converting mm to Km. There are 1,000,000 mm in 1 Km (1000 millimeters per meter, 1000 meters per kilometer).

@@kyleoates6367 thanks for the reality check.

You know, there's a point where saying "put all the bad guys in prison" just seems oversimplified. I say that part of their punishment should be to listen to audio of a Trump rally... Clockwork Orange style.

@@oracleofdelphi4533 Where did I say "all" of them? There are conspirators in high places including Michael Flynn's brother who should face the kind of real justice his brother never did. Examples have to be made of, especially those with high rank and not just some "participant" in the insurrection.

Start with the second Flynn traitor.

Thats easy they are Charles Flynn and Christopher Miller oh and Donald Trump! It’s pretty obvious, but apparently the FBI is too dumb or also complicit to figure it out 🙄

Mike Flynn’s brother comes to mind.

Same here.

i dislike canned laughter... this stuff is great on its own.

Eve's giggle is on a live show. Definitely Showing up!

I like how funny he is after a couple drinks too!

I can't agree with you because I've always wanted to be part of that live audience. Comedy is always better in person & I'm really getting sick of looking at screens.

😂

aka Qtard aka QtipBrains

He's the Shame Man.

@Zach Hogan as long as they were organic muffins!

That white guy putting on a sacred buffalo headdress and pretending to be a medicine man is as bad as if he put on blackface and claimed to be a "witch doctor."

Well I am a shamanist! Oh I only eat processed foods! I believe that everyone should follow my religious beliefs! My beliefs are that people of color should rule the world while the white people should be the servant’s! And I believe that everyone in government should only make $7.25 an hour, and they should pay for their healthcare and they should pay for their legal fees even if they’re being threatened! I believe that there should be no taxes! I believe there should be no taxes because why did we have a tea party! I believe that everyone should mind their own business. I believe the news, should only be true and factual! I believe that the weatherman can only predict three days of weather! I believe anybody in power should go to their constituents first and have a vote on every bill and law that they want to pass. I believe anybody who wants to enter this country with a legal and valid reason should be given amnesty! I believe that if a child shows up to this country alone should be given the protection of the country against the state or city or country that they left! I believe that Everywoman should not be prosecuted if they are sexually assaulted by any means! I believe that the police should carry their own bonded money. I believe the police should pay for their own miss doings! I believe the police should be here to protect and serve and not become Judge jury and executioner in less than 10 seconds or whatever time it takes to kill somebody maybe eight minutes!

I'm sure he's not going to read your post but maybe if you write a letter to father eagle and shove it in a salmon as offering maybe it'll crap on his head.

Ayyy

Don't give them ideas.

Makes sense, their object of adoration is Orange Julius Caesar... With an orangu-tan.

We would be having a different conversation if they had been history students...so let us not pretend they could grasp the nuance.

New date April 1st

When's the next equinox?

It’s French?

@Doog Yggod Idk if either of you are serious, but c'mon guys it's: Bigot. Look it up.

@@kindlin yeah, it's french. We know, dummy

You know those types can't read or write.

@@CerpinTxt87 What does french have to do with anything? The OP was calling Bigo a bigot, it's a fun play on words. Bigot is pronounced _big-uht,_ as in: give the bigot his ticket to stick it in a wicket.

are you perhaps familiar with the darwin awards?

@@hamnonox of course, those require death though.

The dems are doing what exactly...?...no universal healthcare, no minimum wage increase, one time check, and ridiculous unemployment... can you survive on that?....aren't the dems the party to protect the people...???

@@garysmith7760 remember, they’re currently busy cleanin up 4 years of mess. And healthcare, after GOP were so desperately trying to dismantle what Obama put in place and was providing healthcare to millions of Americans. Did I mention they’re promising that a much better healthcare would come which didn’t materialize for all of the 4 years?

​@@garysmith7760 Biden signed how many exec orders on day one? He's been in office for two months. Nothing happens overnight. Duh. And minimum wage was one of the first things attempted, so why'd you throw that in the mix? I get the feeling you don't really have your finger on the pulse. Try taking it from the wrist instead of the rectum...

Also where does he think that money is going to be spent? Here's a hint - the American economy.

Nah. He doesn't realise that dystopia is rendered in many keys, not just one.

Yeah but it was pretty funny. What a bunch of losers

Tone deaf=equals Repug. Perfect fit.

I'd be honored if some fellow Colbert fans would take a quick listen to my acoustic piano & vocal performances of DANCING IN THE DARK by Bruce Springsteen and JACK & DIANE by John Cougar Mellencamp on my YT channel in tribute to the United States of America and our 46th President, Joseph R. Biden. Live acoustic with no autotune or digital editing. Peace and everybody stay safe out there.

Colbert sang the Anthem at Citi field 2 years ago. He nailed it, has a very good voice. It's on UKposts.

Is Gov. Abbott of Texas a good example of Covidiocy?

@@shirleyrombough8173 You mean the guy who lifted all health and safety restrictions for his own citizens concerning Covid-19, and claimed that illegal immigrants are increasing Covid-19 transmissions/infections, while also not allowing covid testing for those immigrants? Well, yeah, good example.

@@LindaB651 Yeah, that one. He may have been his own undoing. I have had to visit a variety of stores and businesses this week and found that everyone, employees and customers, all wearing masks and all practicing social distancing. None of us wants to die nor do we want to inflict death on one another. The citizens, in this case, are much smarter than our elected officials. But this was the case for the last four years.

I enjoy watching from Australia. Blessings to you all.

Let's keep Evie close to the desk, whatever.

Obviously he didn't get a pardon because he was antifa all along, he just didn't know it

If he only knew how much Trump could give a rat's behind about anyone but himself...

“I mean yeah I stormed the capitol building with a bunch of people who were plotting to take hostages and kill the Vice President.... but I also sang song to uplift everyone’s spirits and I stopped muffins from being stolen. Why didn’t I get a pardon?”

he likes insurrectionists who aren't abysmal failures.

The process of grief over a breakup can be complicated...give him some space. Preferably a 10' x 10' space.

@Navin Johnson he won't be a muffin man for long in there.....next on the shortstop he will be a cream-filled cupcake......dunma**

All those furry fan prisoners are going to absolutely love him in prison! 🦊🐱🐰🐼

She's wonderful, like Jimmy Fallon & Higgins. 💜

I think you meant “without”.

@@jw8160 thanks

Sending you kind thoughts.

😆😆👍. So, is he saying here that he went all the way inside (uninvited and there for ILLEGAL) to ensure that people were on their best behaviour ??! Whilst trying to round up people so they could hurt/kill them ?! If he thinks we'll believe That, he must be on weed laced muffins himself.

And all that food would have to be thrown out anyway. Between all the smoke and tear gas and whatever the attackers could have done to them they wouldn't be safe to eat.

😂👏👏

And waiting for Wandavision...

he has gotten me through many a day and night. he really stepped up to the plate for us. best kind of patriot there is (it’s kind of fun to use the word patriot correctly)

Nurse, we need 10 cc's of "ohh snap!" Immediately!

@@seiyuokamihimura5082 😂🤣

Ewww there’s not enough $

That was the best line!

Hilarious.....

🤣🤣🤣

Also a guarantee: That it has no real-life application to anything in his cranium, nor his pants.

“Almost”???

@@EH23831 Well, I can't factually back up my claim, so that "almost" is a CYA for my belief that "Bigo" is a legend in his own mind.

@@Dakhoth 😂

Delusions run deep.

They're actually brainwashed!

None of them have ever been used as thoroughly as President Narcissist used them.

Al Capone went to JAIL for tax evasion. Trump is NEXT

He feels like a Dad telling his best jokes on holiday.

LOL You basically need Stephen to not realize that hasn't been funny for about 5 years.

@@a.d.3606 Of course he's been funny, now he's just feeling the desperatin that the rest of us are, and that's somehow comforting.

@@samhartford8677 There wasn't anything to feel desperate about 3, 4, 5 years ago. When Stephen used to use satirical attacks on power, even against Democrats... while he was hosting his Comedy Network show, he was still funny. But now he's just increasingly just become a soulless shill for the Democrats and his corporate sponsors... and its just really sad now. The only humor left is the irony of his show itself now. LOL i mean.. come on... talking about insane Qanon conspiracy theories that barelly anyone believes, while in the next breath pushing baseless conspiracy theories about the Pentagon... -_- LOL I literally know conservative folks who have to come to people like Colbert to get their news on the Qanon conspiracy theories because they don't acutally know anyone who believes all of that. hahahah now that's funny. But so sad too...

@@a.d.3606 Please. 30% of Republicans have favourable view of the Qanon conspiracy! And why did it take Pentagon 3+ hours to respond, please explain? I'm from Europe and I watched the insurrection the whole night wondering where the troops were. They were there for the BLM, but not there when the line in command was threatened? You may want to find out excuses for your lot, but please do not insult my intelligence. I have my brain, which has not been poisoned by Fox News. I will never respect another Republican politician in my entire life, given what they have become, spinning Russian propaganda and being OK with not supporting NATO.

Don't forget former reality TV star

As with all his worst work, the twist is a let-down :-(

....said the buffalo MedicineManic...'wish I had kept some of those muffins for my prison stay...they would have made great butt tampons'.

And that was still more accurate than the last airbender

😂🤣🍸 One too many drinks 🍸 🙄 😒

And the movie still sucks

Only untill the next guy/girl does it ofcourse. 😒😒🤦🤦