How To Make People Respect You If You're Quiet

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Charisma on Command

Charisma on Command

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People love Tommy Shelby from Peaky Blinders. He’s a quiet, introverted character, and at the same time extremely charismatic.
While you don’t want to be like Tommy in every way, there are 8 habits you can learn from him to instantly command respect from the people around you.
⏰TIMESTAMPS⏰
0:00 - Intro
0:21 - #1: Have slow, relaxed movements
0:57 - #2: Hold eye contact, even during conflict
1:57 - #3: Be non-reactive to hostility
3:00 - #4: Be as big as your audience
3:33 - #5: Show conviction with your words
3:56 - #6: Show conviction with your tone
4:26 - #7: Speak slowly and use pauses between words
6:23 - #8: Use carrot / stick motivation
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#PeakyBlinders #ThomasShelby #CharismaOnCommand
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КОМЕНТАРІ: 4 300
@Ar-1
@Ar-1 Рік тому
That laid back attitude is what pulls ya in. I have also noticed he is a man of few words. No cracking jokes, no extra fluffy words. Every thing he says is on point. Only Talking when its necessary is a great way to put more weight on your words!
@Introvertedalpha
@Introvertedalpha Рік тому
So true!
@noureldin6388
@noureldin6388 Рік тому
Law of power 4: Always say less than necessary
@darkaera9131
@darkaera9131 Рік тому
@@noureldin6388 48 law of power 🤟🤟😎
@Chip_Fuse
@Chip_Fuse Рік тому
A fish with it's mouth open always gets caught.
@SamMartinPeakPerformance
@SamMartinPeakPerformance Рік тому
Truth man
@peterblood50
@peterblood50 Рік тому
Tommy had something most people don't. He had no fear of death as he had faced it many times during the war. He, basically, had nothing to lose as he felt he was living on borrowed time anyway. Combine that lack of fear with an analytical mind and you have a very strong personality indeed.
@tomystark5606
@tomystark5606 Рік тому
Everyone is afraid of death.
@tomystark5606
@tomystark5606 Рік тому
@Samson 92 in some way every being is. So dont lie.
@scr0tumxxx932
@scr0tumxxx932 Рік тому
​@Samson 92 do you think you are edgy now for stating that you dont fear of death and claiming you have depression? the real guys out there that have real depression wont go around in yt vid comments and "flexing" with their mental problems, because they are actually ashamed of it, because they actually have that and they really dont want to have it, they try to chage for good, and especially, because of their lack of desire for life, they wont even probably have the energy to turn on their phone or computer, not like you who running around flexing with a serious mental problem. you probably just plain miserable, father went away ur mom prob cant do any motivation and u stuck at ur screen with waay too much time in ur miserable life, go out touch some grass, and stop falsely claiming a serious mental problem, cause within some time no ones gonna believe to an even chronically depressed guy because idots like you set this attention seeking a trend. ppl like you legit make me wanna throw up
@TexasRedOutlaw
@TexasRedOutlaw Рік тому
@@tomystark5606 Fear of death is irrational, because you will never experiance it, you will never experiance anything other than being alive, you won't know you're dead. You can fear the process of dying, that can involve pain and suffering, you can fear being forgotten or forgetting everything, you can fear the expanse of eternity. Personally I actually fear at some point during that eternity, becoming aware of it, and having to experiance eternity. I would prefer if the end was truly the end, which is why I'm not religious. But death itself is nothing to fear, for it is nothing itself.
@trucquynh3948
@trucquynh3948 Рік тому
guy said it himself, only tommy shelby can kill tommy shelby
@Boat389
@Boat389 9 місяців тому
Being calm in almost every situation comes easy for those of us that are dead inside..
@ebubeofozor5240
@ebubeofozor5240 4 місяці тому
No cap bro.
@user-fo5mq2be5c
@user-fo5mq2be5c 2 місяці тому
xinw
@Misslotusification
@Misslotusification Місяць тому
Or awake, would say the Buddha.
@leutiagrey8030
@leutiagrey8030 27 днів тому
You may be short tempered.
@tinetoftsteig8596
@tinetoftsteig8596 23 дні тому
So so true
@jeffburgmeier127
@jeffburgmeier127 11 місяців тому
I think the key is not to let emotion control your actions. He may seem quiet and unhurried, but you can tell his brain is going 250 mph. Being unemotional and confident is not just something you start doing one day. It takes a long time to get to that point.
@olddugg
@olddugg 10 місяців тому
Exactly.....take this to 5000 Comment asap😂😊
@CanadianHorseFace
@CanadianHorseFace 9 місяців тому
Word my friend. I've been told multiple times that I'm quiet and calm, while my brain is not at all. I'm always shocked by people's perspective of me. If we could all be a part of some reality show, i guess we could see ourselves go and learn. But otherwise, idk what's going on lol
@GamingLarry20554
@GamingLarry20554 7 місяців тому
Exactly! Its the practice and time that turns you into a person such a Thomas. I honestly think majority of these channels tips are cool, but won't apply for your average person. Sure, you can maneuver and talk like Thomas all you want and it might even work, but the reason why he is the way he is, is because of the war. He went through some pretty intense stuff that no one will ever go through in their lives in the 21st century, unless exposed to it willingly. He is stone cold and moves the way he does because he experienced way worse during the war and he truly does not care anymore. I think a better advice for the viewers of this channel would be to actually go through tough situations like Shelby which will chisel your personality and develop your self esteem. You can only fake and emulate a character/model to a certain extent. Its way more efficient to emulate the tribulations these character go through even if it is to a lesser extent.
@carpediem5882
@carpediem5882 4 місяці тому
A long time or a long time being abused.
@Creati-01
@Creati-01 2 місяці тому
Is he calm because he is unreactive or is he unreactive because he's calm
@gregbors8364
@gregbors8364 Рік тому
Yeah, Cillian Murphy is always charismatic, because he’s a great actor.
@s.beccari4678
@s.beccari4678 Рік тому
Scarecrow
@dmytoe5679
@dmytoe5679 Рік тому
He's a good actor, because he's charismatic.
@sludgerat666
@sludgerat666 Рік тому
@@dmytoe5679 goes hand in hand 👌
@clintonkeith5333
@clintonkeith5333 Рік тому
Maybe he trained as an actor and learned various techniques to “act” that way. E.g. He acted, like a coward in Dunkirk. He's not a good actor because he”a a coward.
@justinetters4544
@justinetters4544 Рік тому
That’s your excuse huh?
@manufacturedfear
@manufacturedfear Рік тому
The key, in my opinion, is not having fear. I don't mean having zero fear like the peaky blinders character, but however trying to overcome social fears, like the stress we feel when speaking to a random person on the street. We have to repeat a thousand times there's no danger. Once we have assumed we're not in danger, fear disappears
@jongustavo7864
@jongustavo7864 Рік тому
Yea, until you cross paths with the wrong person and knocked out, then you'll fear, for the rest of your life, d!psh*t
@KorporalNoobs
@KorporalNoobs Рік тому
Still recovering from the stab in the dark alley, but I think this guy has a point.
@milanthelen4663
@milanthelen4663 Рік тому
True, but try to say it positive, a sentence without „no“ is stronger. Like “I’m brave and strong“
@xyoyoman831
@xyoyoman831 Рік тому
in psychopathology and one of its intervention to help many patients with phobia is "exposure therapy" and the concept is similar to what you said here, so it is based off of actual cognition research
@pankajlamba6871
@pankajlamba6871 Рік тому
Movie name?
@ortega324
@ortega324 10 місяців тому
The thing is, it's not about behaviours, it;s about what is behind those behaviours. When you feel confident, the eye contact, the slow movement comes naturally, it is not something you plan or remember to do, you just feel that way. Feeling confident and calm is much more complex than looking someone in the eyes
@krazyxki
@krazyxki 9 місяців тому
Facts, as a quiet, introverted, somewhat shy but now very confident and self assured person, I now naturally do this. But I've put myself out there enough and tolerated disrespect enough to demand respect from others and nothing less. I don't tolerate any disrespect. And so when I carry myself, that natural translates through. People ALWAYS think I'm an extrovert when it comes to the conversation about personality types even though I speak the least in a group.
@TheProtagonist37
@TheProtagonist37 5 місяців тому
Exactly. It all started in the mind. When your mind is right, your body will naturally follow.
@Lyndanet
@Lyndanet Місяць тому
@@TheProtagonist37I like focusing on the body eventually my mind catches up
@little_muhammad82
@little_muhammad82 Місяць тому
You know it's bad when you try to make eye contact but can't do it for a long time not because of lacking confident, but because of eye soring and tears coming out automatically 😭
@lucaslyng2875
@lucaslyng2875 Місяць тому
@@little_muhammad82🗿
@Brieg_Skald
@Brieg_Skald 10 місяців тому
As an introvert person who lacks lot of confidence and always feel in a rush againt time available, I have great respect for those kind of personalities and that is also what I would like to build more as a person. That is very insightful, thanks.
@alexr448
@alexr448 Рік тому
As an introverted person, I’ve learned that the very first point he made about having slow movements is true. Before, I used to rush to do things, making it clear that I was always in a hurry. I started to be meticulous about everything, and people who I later befriended said I seemed confident. It works lol
@Jaxan-dq2jy
@Jaxan-dq2jy Рік тому
It can go both ways Having no hesitation and quick movement makes you seem devoted Having slow movement makes you seem methodical I'll try to do the slow movement thing more and see what happens I think it's important for energy preservation, introspection, and presence
@enricoleon_3302
@enricoleon_3302 Рік тому
​@@Jaxan-dq2jy how did it go man?
@Jaxan-dq2jy
@Jaxan-dq2jy Рік тому
@@enricoleon_3302 Oh I didn't explicitly test anything too much since my social calendar isn't the fullest right now. I've been in a more introspective period recently When I walk slowly it forces me to be more patient and reflect more often and I don't really notice any social change, I think it comes across as intimidating sometimes though, at least that's what someone told me last year (i move slowly naturally, this was before i was aware of it and tried to move slower intentionally). I am also unsure how much people respect me since that is not really something you can gauge unless you ask, but I don't often feel disrespected so maybe it plays a part in that, but I often let people talk over me since I don't like interrupting them so maybe that's a form of disrespect if you think about it? I don't like being in people's faces and trying too hard to gain their attention Also my philosophy watching these is probably different to most, I don't put too much importance on changing myself to attract other people because that is a bit inauthentic to me and defeats the point of low effort attraction. If you have to try and act a certain way to attract people is it really attraction? I think trying to please everybody socially and have a strong presence is a great way to disappoint and burn yourself out, not that social status doesn't matter and that you shouldn't try to improve, it's just that there is always someone who will ignore you simply because they are attracted to different traits or are preoccupied with their own lives. How much attention you get from others doesn't determine your value So yeah I don't really have a clear answer for you since I don't take it that seriously and prioritize other things, I acknowledge that might be disappointing. I just watch these for some passive learning, it's fun to learn about people :) Being too concerned with how you come across is a recipe for anxiety so I try to accept my natural traits first, even if they are unconventional or weird and then use more covert methods like these if I need to. Example: If you have naturally dreamy eyes and look around when you think or reply to someone, there's no need to force yourself to make strong eye contact with someone unless it's important or are listening to them. Forcing yourself to do something unnatural to you can sometimes spur growth, but it can also be needlessly tiring
@caynereed8988
@caynereed8988 Рік тому
@@Jaxan-dq2jy What you described, came as stoicism. Slow movements, proving for yourself not others, and focusing on your nature. It is not for everyone I concur.
@Jaxan-dq2jy
@Jaxan-dq2jy Рік тому
@@caynereed8988 Yeah I guess so, I'm passively studying it in my spare time right now Things like : Intrinsic motivation over social status Desensitization of negative emotions to increase positive ones and mitigate negative ones I don't consider myself a "stoic" but I try to extract the insights that work for me while not obeying its rules too strongly. Every ideology has flaws and I think I'm better off borrowing pieces from others to create my own, although still flawed one At least for me philosophical pursuits are more valuable then conventional self improvement, since it helps you discover what you actually care about, who you are, and strategies to deal with life instead of some guru telling you what you need to do in order to be happy and get everything you want That just feeds hedontic adaptation (we get used to the things and experiences we have so things and experiences that make us happy wear off) and neglects individuality
@NickNotas
@NickNotas Рік тому
Body language goes a long way. Things like: standing tall, taking up more space, not crossing your arms tightly, and making good eye contact. It's the difference between "he looks so awkward" and "he's the strong silent type."
@Introvertedalpha
@Introvertedalpha Рік тому
Agreed!
@Beatboxskill
@Beatboxskill Рік тому
Being attractive and having status is the difference
@marlenegold280
@marlenegold280 Рік тому
These are known male traits. Just watch a man sit and a woman sit. A man sits to take up space, women cross things to appear smaller. Men: Spread legs, elbows out, more gesticulation Women: Crossed legs, crossed arms or wrists, angled away, often a more whispery voice. That’s why Marilyn Monroe did all those things.
@jellebag
@jellebag Рік тому
@@Beatboxskill blackpill always collects. i started loling when he says at the end "being confident is easier than it seems" then shows a bunch of chad celebrities "standing tall" and looking "confident", then tries selling his program. standing tall only works if you are actually tall
@thechaz83
@thechaz83 Рік тому
Attractiveness looks different for different people.
@user-dq8ww3qp9f
@user-dq8ww3qp9f 2 місяці тому
i am 14 he is my insparation
@_ycee_official
@_ycee_official 7 місяців тому
Your insights provide a roadmap for introverts and those who prefer a quieter demeanor to navigate social situations with grace and authenticity. I appreciate the wisdom you've shared and believe it will empower many to embrace their unique strengths. Well done
@aingle4239
@aingle4239 Рік тому
Dude absolutely played his character to perfection. Exactly like someone who’s been through a lot
@kayleighschofield1745
@kayleighschofield1745 Рік тому
yes, they chose the right actors
@mindscopechannel
@mindscopechannel Рік тому
couldn't agree more
@mitchell3877
@mitchell3877 Рік тому
It will forever be his masterpiece, the show show had the best casting I've seen in a show.
@PsychologyRefresh
@PsychologyRefresh Рік тому
These are some incredibly effective ways to instantly command respect from people: - Be vocal about your flaws - Compliment people around you - Hold your ground - Keep your word - Improve your body language
@Introvertedalpha
@Introvertedalpha Рік тому
Thanks for the advice!
@PsychologyRefresh
@PsychologyRefresh Рік тому
@@Introvertedalpha You're welcome!
@deathstarvsdeathstarvs7009
@deathstarvsdeathstarvs7009 Рік тому
vocalizing your flaws is a very good way in being confident because it shows that you are comfortable with the flaws you have. good list btw :)
@WernerLad
@WernerLad Рік тому
@@Introvertedalpha No B
@JakobManthei
@JakobManthei Рік тому
Thank you for the advice!
@T-StoryChannel
@T-StoryChannel 4 місяці тому
This video is exactly what I needed to start my day on a positive note. It's a reminder that success comes to those who work hard and never give up. Thank you for this motivation!
@kakamaron8856
@kakamaron8856 Рік тому
i think the most important thing is not the way we act, but more to the way we think, knowing our way in and out in variety of situation, got every everything mapped out that drives our motoric system to perform the coolness of tommy shelby.
@samratdey6590
@samratdey6590 Рік тому
Thomas shelby was a world war 1 veteran in the series. He was a tunneler, a job which requires you to operate in the worst possible conditions. He was a gypsy who lived his childhood in poverty. And all of this hardships coupled with horrors of the war made tommy who he was. Merely imitating his reactions to certain situations won't make you a tough guy. You have live your life out of your comfort zone to transform your persona into that of someone like thomas shelby.
@goodlife-qd5vc
@goodlife-qd5vc Рік тому
thats what I thought too this video is going to get people into problems
@userandresearcher1036
@userandresearcher1036 Рік тому
Yep, it's pretty much acting like someone you're not.
@polaroidandroidjeff6383
@polaroidandroidjeff6383 Рік тому
They should pin this
@miguelguerin5710
@miguelguerin5710 Рік тому
The simple fact of the situation. He used to laugh a lot, then he turned into what we know him as
@plkaso7515
@plkaso7515 Рік тому
You don't need to experience horrible things to learn from someone who has, or from their actions and beliefs. This video isn't invalidated from this information, because it doesn't rely on this information heavily or directly. There's a bigger focus on the ends than the means.
@insydium7385
@insydium7385 Рік тому
These are things you do naturally when youre confident, these body language videos dont work because youre just imitating confidence. You cant lie to yourself about how you actually feel, people see straight through it
@whorem0anss
@whorem0anss Рік тому
True af you either got it or you dont, not that it cant be developed eventually but its something that will happen naturally with the right combination of people place and time. Like Jim Carrey said, if you wear a mask around people expect to wear that mask to the grave.
@timursultanov4564
@timursultanov4564 Рік тому
@@whorem0anss personality, personal etc...from Greek persona= mAsk...I've eliminated this word from my vocabulary...just a previous comment, saying "strong personality "... not knowing what he's actually talking about...
@evergreenblossom
@evergreenblossom Рік тому
I'm someone who is quiet but not unconfident. I clicked on this video and sure enough, these are all things I do or have picked up as I became an adult (almost scary how accurate). The thing is to really try to understand where each point is coming from and really "feel" it rather than just copying the motions. For me personally, some of these points like holding eye contact, are things I almost see as a challenge to myself- but that is only after I first saw the value in it.
@elisampley7598
@elisampley7598 Рік тому
This guy is an actor. He's not a ww1 vet in real life. He's imitating confidence, to the point people act like it's a real person. How is this obvious point being missed by so many people in these comments. Fake confidence long enough and well enough and it becomes the real thing.
@abbasmahdavi7133
@abbasmahdavi7133 Рік тому
nah bro, im gonna be tommy one day
@joshttale
@joshttale Місяць тому
Key part in the section about pausing in the middle of a sentence, he doesn't use filler words. He's incredibly quick witted and either already knows what he's going to say or uses the pauses to give the impression he does while planning his next move/point of speech
@imanmujahid3159
@imanmujahid3159 Рік тому
Whoever the person given this kind of body language to the tommy charecter is GENIUS
@xxChacaronXX
@xxChacaronXX Рік тому
- Slow And Relax Men Movement - Strong Eye Contact - Not Reactive To Hostility - Be As Big As Your Audience - Show Conviction With Your Words - Show Conviction With Your Tone - Speak Slowly And Use Pauses - Use Carrot/Stick Motivation
@SillyDwarf__
@SillyDwarf__ Рік тому
Basically just acting like the quite kid
@Golabkiwsosiepomidorowym
@Golabkiwsosiepomidorowym Рік тому
autism
@Akash-jn6fp
@Akash-jn6fp Рік тому
I have some of them already should improve in others
@Vibesmen
@Vibesmen Рік тому
@@Akash-jn6fp do you realize people arent 'good' at these because they practiced it its because they lived life and got traumatized
@xxChacaronXX
@xxChacaronXX Рік тому
@@mrjacko2972 I don't think of it as having strong eye contact. I think of it as not having weak eye contact.
@agentepeperoni34
@agentepeperoni34 Рік тому
You forgot to mention that Tommy has breakdowns after some of these scenes, releasing great amounts of stress he felt during periods where he shows himself as being "calm". And he drinks a lot & smokes a lot until the last season.
@king6530
@king6530 Рік тому
FYI, don't do the hostage negotiation strategy when asking for a raise. Most jobs if you indicate you are looking for others will begin to prepare for this and push you out. Even if you get the raise you've effectively sealed your own coffin. Just take the other job if it pays more.
@rkjeffery777
@rkjeffery777 Рік тому
Nothing is free. I can be the calm dude in situations where everyone is running for their lives. Sometimes stress hits you after
@tricky8397
@tricky8397 Рік тому
He probably didn't mention this as it can a does spoil character behavior
@MrKILLINOOBZ
@MrKILLINOOBZ Рік тому
@@king6530 unless said position is extremely rare to find qualified people
@lottnio8207
@lottnio8207 Рік тому
A should consider another career if this causes breakdowns and drinking. It’s just acting.
@rawrbrz
@rawrbrz Місяць тому
you gotta feel this way to truly act this way. fearlessness usually comes from facing extreme hardship
@jonvia
@jonvia Місяць тому
The past few years, I made it a huge goal in social situations to always give eye contact. I noticed that a lot of people dont give me eye contact back which I find very interesting. Its like they dont want me knowing something. Its creepy. I also think confidence scares people that arent confident.
@Far-Reez
@Far-Reez Рік тому
I've tried the first tips (move slowly and relaxed) and "unintentionally" did it in front of my mother. She told me to do dishes when I was just arrived from gas station. I slowly stop at the terrace, gaze straight to her eyes. Then nodding Her reaction was: "Please don't do that again. Some people may feel intimidated and beat you later." Conclusion, the tips was definitely legit.
@yeetwchybaban
@yeetwchybaban Рік тому
lol
@charlottecomfort2446
@charlottecomfort2446 Рік тому
😂
@TheAniki94
@TheAniki94 Рік тому
Lmao 😂
@Latinblood59
@Latinblood59 Рік тому
Lmfaaoo 😂😂
@amapianolifestyle2134
@amapianolifestyle2134 Рік тому
Underated comment🤣🤣🤣
@MarcusConstantine_Cavalida21
@MarcusConstantine_Cavalida21 Рік тому
In summary for the average clumsy introvert: 1. Make reasonably long eye contact. Give a little nod if you wanna be not rude. Smile on command if you know how. 2. Move slowly and orderly. Erratic movement, confused hands and excessive head turning will ruin the Shelby vibe. 3. Think before you speak so you can choose the right words and CUT OUT unnecessary things. Talk slowly too.
@butchershoppequartet8690
@butchershoppequartet8690 Рік тому
As Chase Hughes says, move like you're under water.
@agnidas5816
@agnidas5816 Рік тому
so ... be that sloth front desk clerk/secretary at the police station from Zootopia, Gotcha :P
@MarcusConstantine_Cavalida21
@MarcusConstantine_Cavalida21 Рік тому
@@agnidas5816 Omg.. having reread my writing, you're absolutely right lol.
@bonsummers2657
@bonsummers2657 Рік тому
@@MarcusConstantine_Cavalida21 Better to be like the Red Fox.
@henryadams6501
@henryadams6501 Рік тому
@@agnidas5816 deplete their patience, and win
@user-fi2mi7vc3r
@user-fi2mi7vc3r Рік тому
i love that you will just say things in this video and then show a clip of a tv show intended as proof but in which they get completely disproven
@TobyKarelian-rn3ns
@TobyKarelian-rn3ns 9 місяців тому
Aki Kaurismäki uses these tricks in his films. I learned them from him. Brilliant man, yet so modest.
@valiizzatullayev9609
@valiizzatullayev9609 Рік тому
"The nearer man comes to a calm mind, the closer he is to strength. " - Marcus Aurelius. Confidence comes from within the person. All these body movements just naturally comes when you are in that mode
@rollin4l9
@rollin4l9 Рік тому
*Aurelion Sol
@Albelius
@Albelius Рік тому
I'd say it works both ways when you practice. When you intentionally practice slower movements, it can help the mind to slow down too.
@emperadorzar2023
@emperadorzar2023 Рік тому
ultra instinct?
@Ryosuke1208
@Ryosuke1208 Рік тому
Meditation also does wonders, helping to regulate your emotions to be calm and not reactive, and being mindful of your surroundings goes a long way.
@thomasov2004
@thomasov2004 Рік тому
Marcus Aurelius lived in a slave society. Why would anyone listen to a person like that?
@YTHeroes
@YTHeroes Рік тому
I had a lot of problems holding eye contact with people. What really helped me was the "choosing an eye" thing. It also automatically made me feel more confident because I knew my eyes were completely locked on the person. It was a whole different energy.
@reflex9238
@reflex9238 Рік тому
Kind of like Michael from the Godfather who almost always maintains eye contact with the people he’s talking to.
@aru-YT
@aru-YT Рік тому
just a tip, naturally people's eyes switch over to look at the other one from time to time, so instead of looking at one switch it up, it'll make you seem like you're not staring/uncomfortable
@edz
@edz Рік тому
Whilst studying at college I had a part time job in a store where the manager ruled by intimidation. Everyone was afraid of him - including my naïve immature self. During the time I was there I developed a stutter and the inability to look people in the eye. After I left it took me a few years of maturing to shake that experience off. Thanks Gerald. I learned a valuable life lesson though - respect others, and if you see someone who appears to be nervous around you give them a warming smile and engage with them in nice brief conversation if you can (added humor is a big plus!). You'll be surprised how much of a positive effect this has on a person's confidence.
@bruceanderson7762
@bruceanderson7762 10 місяців тому
I found while making eye contact...alternately blinking each eye has a striking effect...don't exactly kno what...but who your doing it too smiles, and gets all tough tied...ahaha.
@mariajukejax9649
@mariajukejax9649 9 місяців тому
With the eye contact thing, I found it a bit intense to stare into both eyes, so I would focus on the "opponent's" one eye, then, a few seconds later, shift the focus on the other eye. It sounds weird, but it seems to be very disquieting, in my favour fortunately 😂
@randomland2775
@randomland2775 Місяць тому
As an introvert but calm person, this is perfect. I’m looking forward to what effect I’ll have around people once I start using these tricks for now on. Just wanna show the world my confidence.
@top_legendary
@top_legendary Рік тому
One thing I love about this channel is that they are not clickbait
@williams3552
@williams3552 Рік тому
Most important lesson of all: Do it for yourself, never do it for being cool to be with!!! It sounds weird, but when you only do it to impress others, you will give them the power over you. You are doing it for them, therefore they are the ones indirectly controlling you, as your main goal is to impress them. Why is that a problem? If you give them all the power, then the power you show using these tips will be «fake», because it will only be something you do to get respect from the ones in power. So you fake being the boss to impress everyone else, and that makes you the weakest, because you must bend to whatever they want from you. You will be more nervous when you give everyone else this power over you. So do it for yourself. That will give you all the power.
@agnidas5816
@agnidas5816 Рік тому
oh wow so .. complete narcissism ... lmfao ... boy you may be an undiagnosed sociopath
@imthejuggernaut6205
@imthejuggernaut6205 Рік тому
Well put👏.
@brocolindo1
@brocolindo1 Рік тому
For me is basic stand up to the person the way they stand up to you
@BaneOfXistence4
@BaneOfXistence4 Рік тому
There's something else that is important that was ommitted. Whenever somebody does interrupt Tommy with a question, whether he's speaking or giving a proposal, he simply ignores it and continues onward with what he was saying. That speaks volumes without actually having to say anything extra.
@gameera237
@gameera237 7 місяців тому
Caution: Do not try this at school
@SanUnfiltered
@SanUnfiltered Рік тому
Don’t stop when you’re tired. Stop when you’re done.
@fck_4ags_
@fck_4ags_ Рік тому
- Johnny Sins be like
@BlaBla-jj6sh
@BlaBla-jj6sh Рік тому
Be done _before_ you're tired. Work smart, not hard. Or hire someone else to do the work for you. See how your well-intentioned 'advice' is just a platitude? Common, be better than a hallmark card.
@callumpearson2061
@callumpearson2061 Рік тому
@@BlaBla-jj6sh just like ‘work smart not hard’ is a platitude. none of it is this deep, and your advice is so general it borders on meaningless. very ironic that you mocked the other commenter for being unoriginal by responding with clichés
@rottingcorpse1990
@rottingcorpse1990 Рік тому
Especially if you are a trucker or a pilot :^)
@L.I.T.H.I.U.M
@L.I.T.H.I.U.M Рік тому
One way to instantly command/get back respect is by always telling the truth, even if it hurts. But then learning to say it in a way that doesn't offend or make the other person feel more bad than they need to. You can start by writing a list of things you have been lying about to yourself and others.
@Introvertedalpha
@Introvertedalpha Рік тому
Good advice.
@WanderTheNomad
@WanderTheNomad Рік тому
I feel like a lot of people have the misconception that telling the truth necessarily has to hurt/offend the other person, when that just doesn't have to be the case.
@ameennasar2583
@ameennasar2583 Рік тому
@@WanderTheNomad People often think that honesty means letting loose of emotions and being savage for savagery's sake. One classic example is how politicians and dictators who speak obvious lies and stupidities are considered by many as 'straight-forward' and brutally honest.
@michaelbooth2890
@michaelbooth2890 Рік тому
Agreed, it's uncomfortable at first, but also being able to develop calm is the key. I used to have a boss who always left uncomfortable silences. I just sat there waiting for her to fill them. She soon realised I wasn't ready to play her games and that my time was best used at doing my job and not in a personal development review.
@TaiChiRehab
@TaiChiRehab Рік тому
Not true - sometimes you don’t need to say the truth - in some circumstances you don’t have to say anything etc
@KimikoMaui
@KimikoMaui 11 місяців тому
Cillian is AMAZING. He plays different characters with ease.
@Universalwisdomknowledge
@Universalwisdomknowledge 6 місяців тому
copying someone behaviour will never last long the most important thing in life is to be yourself and not depend on what people think of you, people don't respect themselves
@TheLifeFormulaa
@TheLifeFormulaa Рік тому
Great breakdown on Thomas Shelby!
@Introvertedalpha
@Introvertedalpha Рік тому
💯
@Matt_Nor
@Matt_Nor Рік тому
While i think Tommy Shelby is an fascinating and cool character, i also think it is important to differentiate fiction from reality. In Peaky Blinders he knows his place and does things that somehow work wonders and miracles. This character has a fictional history and his nature is more than likely purely based on what the creators of the show wanted it to be, so it can be captivating. Who in his right mind would behave like him and get away with it? Everything is pre determined in the show. You're NEVER gonna be either one. You is the only real thing. Not the character Cillian Murphy portrays. Realistically, If you were put under the pressure Tommy has faced, you'd be dead before you realized it. It's like doing an analysis on Scarface. Sure it's fun, interesting and fascinating but not close to the reality of OUR world. This is just my humble opinion. Don't compare yourself to none other than you. However, is this a cool analysis of Thomas? Absolutely.
@iulianbendrea9010
@iulianbendrea9010 Рік тому
Spot on. And very underrated comment. Too many fiction based characters displayed as role models, indeed.
@syahrizaindrautomo44
@syahrizaindrautomo44 Рік тому
This comment quite true. I almost imitated thomas shelby behaviour into mine. But instantly I regret, because in the show, they do as script wants to or what the shows want to. What we need is just to know what we weak of, then cover it with what we strong of or even built it.
@Matt_Nor
@Matt_Nor Рік тому
@@iulianbendrea9010 I don't mind drawing inspiration from fictional characters, as long as you are still you... However pretending to be them or act like them is another thing. Trying to act like something you aren't is not the authentic or real you. Unless you're a professional actor.
@Matt_Nor
@Matt_Nor Рік тому
@@syahrizaindrautomo44 Creating good and healthy habits is one step in the right direction. Compare yourself to the person you were yesterday and improve upon it, just don't take it too far. Like everything else; practice moderation, healthy and good habits.
@Isabela-ex8hk
@Isabela-ex8hk Рік тому
True!!!!
@darrenjames6753
@darrenjames6753 10 місяців тому
Sadly I was once in a situation where I was held at gun point and I had to keep composure..I’ll never go out late again
@forethoughtx2846
@forethoughtx2846 Рік тому
thank you for leaving the add until the end :)
@hootinouts
@hootinouts Рік тому
My personal experience with being able to speak in front of an audience is to be prepared and to have confidence in what it is you will be communicating. I found that I would almost zone out as I was lecturing as if everything else sort of vanished and I was in my own dimension delivering the message I had prepared ahead of time.
@HaitiansdoitBest
@HaitiansdoitBest 9 місяців тому
I hate speaking in front of an audience. One strategy that sort of helps and I need to keep reminding myself is I have information the audience wants. If not they wouldn't be there. I know more, I can supply the details and the audience is there to receive that info. It's still not 2nd nature. I gotta pump myself up. still hate it
@Ruudwardt
@Ruudwardt Рік тому
People fixate on 'confidence-confidence-confidence'. It is the eventual outcome of good traits aggregating. Form and keep your inner peace. That is the first step. The other is discipline. Confidence is cross product of the two, nothing more. It's like trying to make pancakes without having any idea what are heat, grease, flour, milk and eggs for.
@crazyaskpop7111
@crazyaskpop7111 Рік тому
Couldn't agree more on first two statements
@clovercando
@clovercando Рік тому
Love the pancake analogy 🥞
@andrewcheshire244
@andrewcheshire244 5 місяців тому
One of my favourite scenes in PB (and one missing from this video) was where the horse he's walking with rears up at some loud noise coming from a factory nearby. He calms the horse and whispers in its ear "It's only noise, it's only noise". And with that insight you look around at most of what people say as noise, nothing to be troubled by, most of it nonsense. Stay calm and think.
@LilDeezy43
@LilDeezy43 8 місяців тому
I'm Aussie and all Aussies have a natural upward inflection as if were asking a question, to give you the best example over text here's how it would sound, "I went to the park todaye" - and it sort of sounds like your saying aye at the end but end it in an upward inflection.
@kevingray4980
@kevingray4980 Рік тому
For point 2, if there's a threat of violence, don't look to the side! Looking downward toward the body, if done purposefully instead of evasively is both tactically and psychologically sound. It's easier to keep a cool head, and by looking for their actions instead of words, it's unnerving for them to continue talking. People think of what they see other people looking at, so instead of reflecting back their own emotion through eyes, they start thinking of the vulnerability of their own body. "You're prepared to hurt my body. Do I really want to go there?" instead of "You feel that way about me! How do I feel about you?" I never did it for psychology, just how I learned to fight. But it's had good de-escalatory effect the times I've done it, which made me think.
@brandonjones4
@brandonjones4 Рік тому
He said "glance downwards if you want to de escalate." Interesting story, though.
@fondawilliam8371
@fondawilliam8371 Рік тому
FIRST PLACE I LOOK AT EVERYONE IS ALWAYS TO THEIR SIDE, NOT MINE, BECAUSE THAT'S THE MOST LIKELY PLACE TO CARRY A GUN.
@kevingray4980
@kevingray4980 Рік тому
@@fondawilliam8371 I love The Art of Self-defense, where they ride up on the motorcycle and ask the potential victim if they have a gun before using karate to mug him. It's seems ridiculous, but on the other hand, most people don't know how to respond when put on the spot like that. Most people carrying a weapon of any kind would impulsively move their eyes or hand in that direction. Most people not carrying would give it away. Either way, it improves the odds of singling out a helpless victim.
@fondawilliam8371
@fondawilliam8371 Рік тому
Don't make me laugh. I suppose u r some lame black belt karate 🤓. Don't talk to me till you've actually shot someone, or disarmed somebody with a gun who is bigger than u.
@fondawilliam8371
@fondawilliam8371 Рік тому
@lame azz Kevin.
@DP-ot6zf
@DP-ot6zf Рік тому
The ONLY flaw in this video is that we're seeing examples from _filmed_ scenes.
@preciousgaylevillanueva5277
@preciousgaylevillanueva5277 10 місяців тому
dude, im literally like him irl. Im so amazed while watching it, remind me of myself when i go to school lmaooo
@Lorenzo28ilpolpodorato
@Lorenzo28ilpolpodorato 8 місяців тому
Thanks this is perfect for a guy like me who is quiet but strong if he wants
@sigmasithlord5828
@sigmasithlord5828 Рік тому
Look good and be intimidating in a confident and charming way.
@itsm1ha104
@itsm1ha104 Рік тому
Main thing that lifts you up is acting and feeling on top of the people you talk to even tho ur obviously not. It might seem a bit toxic but people will start to respect you more
@jimmyv1753
@jimmyv1753 Місяць тому
Always love the insights into things that you can see and understand what’s happening. The breakdown of why it’s happening is helpful
@Thebadpiper
@Thebadpiper Рік тому
I've found this helpful as a loud person, trying to learn to be quiet in certain settings.
@simon7580
@simon7580 Рік тому
There is a difference in faking confidence and then knowing who/what you are.
@matthewblackwell5274
@matthewblackwell5274 Рік тому
I've recently began holding eye contact with people I work with and its changed the way I get treated even by my superiors it's great!
@Alpha_Cleaning_Clips
@Alpha_Cleaning_Clips 10 місяців тому
@@nickgarner-uc7jqnah
@joseabad2552
@joseabad2552 Рік тому
Great lessons thank you for making this video ❤
@Shadmansami37
@Shadmansami37 8 місяців тому
1 relax 2 eye contact 3 or 5s 3 non react 4 Be as be as in audience 5 show conviction 6 show conviction & be honest 7 slow speak and use
@k01dsv
@k01dsv Рік тому
Problem with showing conviction like this is that most people can't back it up, causing you to lose credibility. One of my study mates is SO certain of EVERYTHING, yet he's wrong 80% of the time. I'm uncertain of everything, because I'm aware that anyone can make mistakes and have misunderstood something, yet I'm right 90% of the time. But being right most of the time, doesn't change the fact that I can still be wrong and even being wrong 10% of the time with absolute conviction would be worse than being right 90% of the time while not coming across as 100% sure. Because I'm not, no one is. Note: My study mate's conviction and confidence definitely helps him come across as smart with people that doesn't know him, and even helps him in exams, yet anyone that actually knows him take everything he says with a HUGE grain of salt, because he says things with such a certainty even when he's not sure at all. Maybe he thinks he is, but he shouldn't be.
@wtfuredead
@wtfuredead Рік тому
perfect duo! now, about you, i think you could benefit from taking more risk. you will fail more, but learn more.
@spankey88
@spankey88 Рік тому
Lol true. It’s baffling to me how people seem so sure of themselves when they have to realize how often they are wrong
@k01dsv
@k01dsv Рік тому
@@spankey88 It's frustrating to me honestly. Especially when it works for them with people that don't know that they're full of it =P
@shannysalcedo3627
@shannysalcedo3627 Рік тому
@@k01dsv if we were unsure/not confident about everything, nothing would get done due to undeciveness, fear, etc..Mistakes will happen. Failure comes before success
@amra101
@amra101 Рік тому
Talking slowly, allowing ur mind to not fault with speaking and words I love this one tbh
@charleybrown5713
@charleybrown5713 Рік тому
A respectful person simply applies the golden rule and doesn’t need other bs in order to respect.
@Dawn5048Batchelor
@Dawn5048Batchelor 3 місяці тому
Your 100% right and that should work in a ideal world, unfortunately i had realy childish aggressive neighbours move in nextdoor .I tried being reasonable and nice to no good out come so i went all cillian Murphy TOTALY NON THREATENING BUT ASSERTIVE. They were gone within 4 weeks i still see him every now and then he has total respect for me and is not a bad dude after all .
@verniece2
@verniece2 11 місяців тому
His eyes help. He has captivating and mysterious eyes
@mialia15104
@mialia15104 Рік тому
I know Conan has been a topic before, but can you guys commit a full video just to his personality? I feel like he's so charismatic and lovable he just stands out like crazy, I'd love to hear your guys' take
@Dabadabadoobie
@Dabadabadoobie Рік тому
Let's not forget he is a Professional Actor, you're either high or drunk, and you just watched an ad trying to get you to buy into something you can do on your own.
@alkitriaw
@alkitriaw 9 місяців тому
I'm an introvert, and I completely relate to slow movements. I can be quick if I want to, when I do sport, etc. But when I don't have to, I love the slowness. I'm so "good" at being slow and unbothered, that when my extroverted friends react to some weird sounds, and if there would be a huge tornado outside, I would just be sitting on a sofa completely unbothered. While I'm pretty sure 90% of the people would go out take pictures and get excited.
@Bhaiya_77
@Bhaiya_77 8 місяців тому
That laid back attitude is what pull ya In I have also done but not be noticed 😢 but try it it good
@LordPaxr0312
@LordPaxr0312 Рік тому
A personal tip for introverts: Talk and act like if you were so tired, kinda angry, angsty and done with life. I bet even "powerful" people of your environment will respect you, and trust in you. Walk fast, talk loud but slow, work hard and stay humble👑🔥
@dee77jay
@dee77jay Рік тому
<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="152">2:32</a> Thomas: I am chosen cc: I am Jose Mourinho
@Random-sk6hm
@Random-sk6hm Рік тому
they let me go cos they didnt realise I was chill like that
@she_boppin
@she_boppin 3 місяці тому
That’s not confidence. That’s talent.
@2rslvl126
@2rslvl126 9 місяців тому
Quiet people are often shy. You can't just combat shyness by following the lead of a tv show character. You can't just command yourself to have no fear ot to be confident.
@MargotDobbie
@MargotDobbie Рік тому
I'm a confident introvert. I don't talk often however ive noticed im listend to when I speak. I found having strong but not overly strong eye contact is also very useful.
@damianpizarro1896
@damianpizarro1896 Рік тому
Served for 8 years, never have I seen a more relatable character
@Watts_Up_K8
@Watts_Up_K8 Рік тому
Thank you for your efforts ❤️ Sending healing & love your way 😊
@RealMenRealStyle
@RealMenRealStyle Рік тому
Great video!
@tanmay9268
@tanmay9268 Рік тому
You are great ❤️
@cagnusmarlsen5490
@cagnusmarlsen5490 Рік тому
Tommy has such an amazing personality imagine being friends with him...
@DunnsDayDash
@DunnsDayDash 10 місяців тому
These are things you cannot fake or learn. But this video is good for people who already have these traits, because it can help them recognize their own traits, and learn to harness them better.
@rahulkalwankar9811
@rahulkalwankar9811 Рік тому
You know man I make notes of your videos 😁 Your videos are really helpful👍🏻 Thank you for that 🤘🏼
@bugvswindshield
@bugvswindshield Рік тому
heh, I took psych in HighSchool. My teacher was great, one of my favorites, Mr. Murphy. Great understanding man. heres a good one. ~ when asking for something, give yourself time. Days if possible. When talking to your "target" one on one, try shifting your wieght. Maybe lean on a wall. Or lean back. If the person mimics your movement, they are in agreement with you. It is at this time you ask your question. If the person does not, go ahead and wait for another chance. I've used this to get dates, promotions and general life.
@cumber3631
@cumber3631 26 днів тому
Im always quite because of the 2 year mewing streak i am holding, thank you for these videos now everyone will respect me 🙏
@DantjellBLN
@DantjellBLN Рік тому
I agree with you on almost everything, but it also depends on the appearance. He has this special calm, but also charismatic mysterious look when he looks you in the eye which not all people have., which is one of the reasons why he behaves calmly and composed in an almost escalating situation. It depends on how you look on the outside without wanting to offend anyone, it has to be a good looking man like he is, and not to forget, the voice needs to be that deep like his voice, and that is interesting to listen to. All of these aspects together bring the effect that you are describing here very good.
@aishluv8811
@aishluv8811 10 місяців тому
ya that probably good even if your not life experienced person u do look like with this behavior
@JayM928
@JayM928 Місяць тому
Yes, he shows examples where he's staring at someone and that person is staring right back, but Tommy appears more intense and confident than the other person doing the same thing. Why? Because it's not the action itself.
@butchershoppequartet8690
@butchershoppequartet8690 Рік тому
Often, you can identify the dominant person in a group by the fact their movements are less, slower and more deliberate and they can be the ones with the least to say or prove.
@MrSwitchblade327
@MrSwitchblade327 Рік тому
Probably the greatest, well written casted and acted, character and show ever in a series
@exnihilonihilfit6316
@exnihilonihilfit6316 Рік тому
How many series have you watched in your life?
@drm4819
@drm4819 10 місяців тому
I learned a similar thing from teaching children. They lack long attention spans, so making use of pause, speech speed and rhythm really pulled them in and maintained a longer attention span. This showed me that the way to not only garner respect, but to be compelling in speech is by controlling nonverbal additions to communication to add layers to your "credibility". "An expert guitar player can transform a boring piece of music by altering expression, tempo, dynamics and style. He plays with non values". Find the "non values", master them.
@mailbericht5718
@mailbericht5718 9 місяців тому
From one teacher to another, I love your advice! ThankYou!❤
@idealthunder
@idealthunder Рік тому
As a quiet kid, giving people a stressful vibes has been my career since I was a junior high school 💀
@Alpha_Cleaning_Clips
@Alpha_Cleaning_Clips 10 місяців тому
Hahaha me too I stressed them even when I don’t want too . I’m 6’5 at 18, I don’t talk so much , I’m big, it doesn’t help
@SmileYou7
@SmileYou7 Рік тому
This channel has changed my life to the better! Thanks!
@keepmotivation8358
@keepmotivation8358 Рік тому
Same
@cliftonmoore8316
@cliftonmoore8316 Рік тому
His presence Command's attention, his energy can be felt by everyone in the room.
@Badamgarav-os2zh
@Badamgarav-os2zh Рік тому
His aura hits different
@yannaedc5934
@yannaedc5934 8 місяців тому
Happy this got recommended this looks really fun, I'll try some of these :)
@HardyBunster
@HardyBunster 8 місяців тому
He’s an actor, don’t take it seriously…….lol. 😂
@MrHoundog10
@MrHoundog10 Рік тому
David Wright from Survivor would be a great example of someone who had the worst confidence and by the end of his season was one of the most confident people in the room. I hope you guys can cover him because he would be a great example of someone who built that internal confidence by taking risks and understanding the world around him was less scary than he thought. Keep up the good work!
@stuntmastermonkey
@stuntmastermonkey Рік тому
agreed cover him^^
@mikhaellawalden
@mikhaellawalden Рік тому
Interesting breakdown as always! I have a hard time talking slow and pausing at certain points in conversation because I've gotten used to being interrupted and cut off.
@mentalsid3701
@mentalsid3701 Рік тому
Wow, how honest !! I have a Sister, she's a school teacher. Family get together,,,me, I would talk about something and half way through,,"eh I tend to disagree" whither she's right or wrong. THEN, everybody has to shut up while SHE speaks and whoa betide anyone that interrupts her!!! So i know exactly where your coming from !!😊
@Bonbloc
@Bonbloc Рік тому
as confident as i am, i have a tendency to speak fast as well which sometimes results in people being distracted and interrupt me. it feels like good advice to speak slightly slower and a more confident tone and see what happens. how has it worked out for you in the past 8 months?
@mikhaellawalden
@mikhaellawalden Рік тому
@@Bonbloc I haven't really noticed being cut off in conversation, but I have yet to break my bad habit of speaking too quickly or paraphrasing while telling a joke or funny story because I'm worried someone will cut me off and break my rhythm, or just switch topics so I don't get to finish
@crazierthorn10
@crazierthorn10 Рік тому
When you're cut off, hang your last word, stop talking, look them in the eye for 1 second longer than necessary, and 90% of the time, a person will apologize for cutting you off, and go out of their way to not do it again. You're showing them that you don't approve of them speaking over you, but you give respect by stopping what you're saying. It's true that to get respect, you must give it. When you give respect, and are disrespected in the same situation, people feel the need to either apologize, or make it up to that person.
@Bonbloc
@Bonbloc Рік тому
@@crazierthorn10 that only works with 1 on 1 conversations. but in group convo's they just look at something/someone else so you cant maintain eyecontact
@_helloworld_7070
@_helloworld_7070 9 місяців тому
I dont know why this played next but im happy it did i relate too some
@Paddythelaad
@Paddythelaad 7 місяців тому
The examples are always only of people who are fictional characters with plot armour/scripts or of people who are rich / famous. People tend to give those the benefit of any doubt and they tend to get to speak from a position of power. It would be nice to have examples of people in situations where nothing is known of them in advance, instead of talk shows & tv shows.
@strawberrycreme7181
@strawberrycreme7181 Рік тому
I think this video is really effective, although I think it’s important to break down why we do the things we already do (body language). We can’t do without knowing why we feel the need to do.
@user-ey4qp5ro3t
@user-ey4qp5ro3t Рік тому
скорее всего, это заложено природой, когда были инстинкты, чтоб нравиться противоположному полу и показывать другим так сказать "сородичам", что мы испытываем
@overseer5060
@overseer5060 Рік тому
Fake it till you make it, always an amazing tip for me
@TotallyLostSoul
@TotallyLostSoul Місяць тому
Tommy Shelby is my spirit animal.
@daniellaNicole0
@daniellaNicole0 Рік тому
seeing all these clips make me wanna watch this show
@christopherrayulloa6281
@christopherrayulloa6281 Рік тому
Crazy how I do this naturally. Although it could be my subconscious picking up these traits from movies/shows I've watched since I was little.
@luizfelipemedeiros7506
@luizfelipemedeiros7506 Рік тому
What makes Tommy so confident is the script.
@dead.or.alive.333
@dead.or.alive.333 Рік тому
"Fake it till you make it." really works for me
@user-qg5wg9ut2o
@user-qg5wg9ut2o 9 місяців тому
Thank you for sharing your wonderful knowledge ❤
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