-Take action when feeling lonely -Change response to failures -Protect your self esteem -Battle negative thinking

"It makes us really afraid to reach out because why setup yourself for heartache and rejection when your heart is already aching more than you can stand" this really cuts me deep..

This video is a perfect example of the good the internet can do. Imagine how many lives this man has touched with his words. How many lives he has saved. All thanks to the world wide web.

I appreciate how Ted Talks named this video "How to practice emotional aid" and not "How to practice emotional aid on yourself " Because we all came thinking how we could help others...and returned learning how we could help ourselves firt

He has such a calming, gentle voice. Makes you feel like everything will work out

Listening to the guy's voice, he could have a successful second career narrating kids' shows on the BBC.

Man. I always see the right random TedTalk at the right time :)

"Whether you think you can, or you think you can't--you're right.” ― Henry Ford

I clicked on this video for the purpose of helping my friends who have mental health problems but this guy made me realise that it was me who needed help. I really appreciate this video

"Break a negative cycle before it begins" Damn. That hit too hard.

5:40 Loneliness 7:32 Pay attention to emotional pain 7:42 Failure (toy-activation example) 10:58 Stop emotional bleeding 11:46 Rejection (divorcee example) 13:34 Protect your self-esteem 13:45 Rumination 15:40 Battle negative thinking

I would watch this over and over again to remind myself about the harms of rumination. That I need to do something about this chronic anxiety and loneliness.

I really love how he addresses the issue of emotional health without shoving his expertise in psychology to the audience, while still able to get everyone to hear what he says thanks to his narrative-ish speech-which I must say is really easy to understand. We really need more humble professionals like him.

12:44 This is something I have never considered. He's so right that we would never make a physical injury worse. We would protect it and care for it so it can heal. Yet, we don't do that with emotional injuries. We often make them worse with negative thinking. What a revolutionary concept to treat our minds the same way we do our physical body. I only wish we were all taught how to do this. It makes me want to learn more about it.

No doubt. You are a "REAL"Doctor. Your speech brought tears to my eyes. We tend to be so hard on ourselves. Thank you so much

Loneliness being purely subjective was such an eye opening statement. I feel like often when someone says they’re lonely someone else will point out all the “tangible” ways that they aren’t. But at the end of the day it doesn’t matter, you can be in a see of people but if you don’t have the specific connection you NEED then you will be lonely and it’s not for anyone else to perceive but you. That’s so powerful

"loneliness affects immune system" Me- *cough*

Best thing I got from this--- treat yourself like a good friend. That is amazing

Hi Ted! I am a nurse. In my life I have to deal with many situations that mainly consists in loneliness and rejection even from my own family. It has been very sad that I barely had emotional support from my parents. This lack of happiness and a constant search for it corrupted by my surroundings has made me struggle all my life till today in my last semester for my Bachalor's. One thing that distinguishes me is that no matter what my situation is I will succeed. It has been extremely hard to deal with my father's and mother's divorce along with their rejection and cruelty to me. I know everything I just wrote is very personal but most people are scared of speaking about it, I am not because I know that the sun will rise again and I will be able to breathe and treat my patients with the love I never had. I am more than thankful for your studies, your effort and your determination to help people. Thank you!

I found myself close to tears a few times. That tells me that I have some emotional hygiene issues to work on. I'd like to watch this again with my whole family. I hope it would stimulate a positive, healing conversation. Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge and insights, Dr Winch.

My sister sent me this because I've been struggling with depression for a couple of years and, to be honest, I really needed this. I really like the way he presents this issue, he seems so natural and passionate.

It's so difficult being compassionate to yourself...

I love how much love he has for his brother and how he shows it.

When he talked about him waiting for his brothers call, I started to cry. I know that feeling so good...

I teared when he he talked about how lonely he was when his brother "didn't" call

Wow. The story about rejection and calling the "friend"...🤯💯💯💯

2:10 "Walk it off, it's just in your leg." 3:28 "My brother is also a psychologist, so he's not a real doctor either." 4:13 "We decided to splurge and we talked for 10 minutes." 10:03 "I said "In the front seat" but that made no sense to him whatsoever, so now he thought I was on drugs."

After recovering from a traumatic event i churned over and over why it ate into me, why it left me hollow. And i realised that it was less the event and more of how i had hacked away at my mind and soul by negative thoughts that i collapsed into a nobody. I lost my confidence, pride, compassion, desire to live ; all because of what i did to my lonely self within the four walls of my empty house. I hate to discuss my personal life but i know what it is like, so anyone feeling the same, please know what this guy has said is true. It is just a state of mind not the reality. You can change your reality by changing your state of mind. Bless you x

Loneliness, failure, rejection, rumination.. sounds like a checklist of my life.

I'm just 3 min in and already love this. "Just walk it off. It's all in your leg" XD

This was posted 7 years ago and I am just now seeing it. ❤ Sharing with my adult children and friends.

I have never related to a WHOLE video about what I have been struggling to since the pandemic and this video made me feel safe and that I am valid wherein a lot of times I do not feel that way in my life. In the past month, I worked as an intern here in our place and I started it with a whole different and new environment in my home/neighborhood and even all of the people I worked with were all complete strangers to me. I never let my guard down in that short amount of time I've been an intern so that the people there won't really know who I am, that I am a very vulnerable person and also have depression and anxiety. I couldn't even believe myself that whole time there, I was the strong person that I wish I could be in everyday, but I guess I really just have episodes in my life. Getting better everyday!

This was probably the best TED talk I've ever heard.

The reason he could talk with such conviction and also convince us is because he has been through it and shared the same honestly. Great Ted talk.! 👌✌️

A master in his field, making a difficult subject understandable and relatable.

Thank you for this video, I was feeling so down and you just gave me a different perspective to look at things. It's a great comparison to the physical wounds, because often times we are the ones that putting ourselves with deeper pain without realizing the actions.

The clarity he projected with the concepts were spectacular. one of the best TED videos so far.

Having any mental/emotional problems is considered weak and embarrassing, which discourages psychological "routine check-ups", among other things. Plus, letting yourself be vulnerable with a complete stranger is terrifying.

Thank you Guy, this video has given me confidence after so many years of feeling deep lonliness and listening to my insecurities. It caused me to hurt the people i care about the most and push them away as the pain i felt/still sometimes feel can consume my thoughts completely and tell me i'm all alone, even when people were trying to reach out to me. I'm going to take your advice and carry it with me every time i feel the doubts starting to set in. Never give up the fight for happiness in life to anyone reading this. Never give up on yourself.

This has helped me so much. Its helped me recognize why I've been feeling so bad for the past three months, and now I'm going to try and take action and talk to the person causing me pain to tell them how they're hurting me. I can't thank this man enough :,)

1. We value physical health more than psychological health. If we had a broken leg, we would not say walk it off. But we do that with loneliness, failure, depression. 2. Take action when you're lonely. Loneliness makes us believe those around us care less than they actually do. It is based on your personal perception. Loneliness can be as harmful to your health as cigarette smoking. 3. Don't let your mind be tricked by failure Are you aware how your mind deals with failure? People believe their setbacks means they're no longer capable and do not reach their potential. Our minds are hard to change once it's made up. We have to fight to stop feeling the failure. 4. Be your own best friend and protect yourself against rejection. Rejection forces us to call ourselves names and damage our own self esteem. We wouldn't get a cut on our arm and dig at it and make it worse, but we do that with psychological. Instead, we need to protect our self esteem. Treat yourself with the same compassion you would treat others. 5. Constantly battle negative thinking. Rumination is when you agonize over the same idea over and over. Study shows even a two minute distraction is enough! Battle negative thinking constantly will foster positive thinking.

Rumination is horrible stuff indeed. I speak from experience.

This video made me that I wanna study psychology 4 years ago .... and now Im a college student of psychology in japan. When I get tired I come to here sometimes. Thank you so much doctor guy winch you makes my confidence always

This is gotta be one of my favorite TED talk. Thank you Dr. Guy Winch, your speech really saved my life. Stay strong everyone.

We take our kids for physical vaccinations, dental exams, eye checkups. When do we think to take our - our son or daughter for a mental health checkup?

One of the best Ted Talks I've ever watched

Hearing him speak on failure was particularly eye opening for me. I am recently out of a serious period of depression because of a failure. This gives me hope I can tackle inevitable future failures more mindfully!

This talk really hit me emotionally. It felt like he was speaking directly to me personally. Like he was looking into my soul. We’ve all been through so much. We’ve all been hurt, had shame and guilt. It’s time I practiced emotional hygiene. I’ve beat myself up and allowed myself to be beaten up too much for far too long. It’s time to start helping myself and healing. Thank you Guy.

what an incredibly powerful talk. Being your own best friend as an emotional band aid. I must remember that.

Choosing to watch this video, despite the length, is probably the best thing I've done this week. How does this video not have more views? Everyone needs to watch this

Thank you so much for this. As a lone twin it touched me on so many levels. At my sisters funeral I had everyone read out the I love myself statement from Louise Hays book You can heal your life. I instinctively knew I would only survive her death by trying to love myself as much as she did. But the loneliness runs deep here on this physical plane even though I know spiritually we are still joined. So glad for you that you still have your twin and you are sharing the life lessons you came together for. Thanks for the tips I will definitely use the two minute distraction technique. God bless you both.

We should watch this every day! Brilliant, obvious but desperately needed!

Throughout the video, why did I feel like I was having a one-on-one session with the speaker? 😅

Maybe try journaling everyday for ten minutes, talking to yourself or about yourself, positively and compassionately. I've heard that it's a good way to slowly change the way you think.

I've been diagnosed with anxiety and depression, I wasn't looking for this type of video I just stumbled upon it and started listening. I must say it made me realize my healing starts here and I'm not alone ,and I need to fight this battle.

Love the calm tone of his voice. Learing to control your thoughts is the greatest of all gifts. Excellent talk.

I used to be the worst ruminator you could ever imagine. Especially during elementary school, I would spend the entire day stuck in my mind, regretting everything I've ever done and reliving the shame. As I got older, I started to notice how this bad habit was making my life miserable, and over the years I learned how to be mindful of it when it happens and remind myself that it's not healthy, that my brain makes everything more negative than it is, and more recently, I've also started stopping it with distractions. I don't know how healthy it is because usually I distract myself by watching UKposts videos lol, but at least when it's TED Talks, I learn something!

Ruminating is what I’m doing right now. I can’t stop hearing all the negative stuff I heard in a recent disagreement with a loved one. It’s overwhelming and causing me anxiety. I keep thinking bad stuff about myself. I want to be better. This video is much needed and I’m on my way to getting better. Thank u.

Love listening to the guy. He is so calm and can make people feel better with just his words.

I've seen quite a few TED talks now, but this one is by far my favourite! Don't get me wrong, I love watching most of the other ones, but this one is really special in my opinion.

this guy gave me a boost and let me aspire to become a psychotherapist

holy crap.... he's absolutely RIGHT! I was on the verge of tears hearing him point out whats been the matter with me for the past 3years! I've been lonely, depressed, and have been nothing but negative to myself. But the moment he defined what loneliness is and does I knew b4 he started talking about how to change it. and my tears became of happiness. positmestic, hopeful, and encouraged! The encouragement that ive been searching for for years now. as simple as that, it was or is, like a slap in the face! how obvious! idk how long this joy of releif will last, however it doesn't matter anyway because I know now, what it is, and how to fix it. Thank you, thank you sooooo sooooooooo sooooooooooooooooo much! !!!

Perfect voice for voice acting, voice overs, audio book, etc.

In the past years I've been watching videos like this, and reading about things like these... But oh lord. This is the first one that actually reach my mind. It's like he broke a wall that I didn't know it existed. There are no words to describe how grateful I am now... And motivated to know myself better.

Thank you , I've experienced all that you've said and learnt to practice the Emotional First-Aid all by myself. I'm proud to have come up with the techniques myself but I'm also very happy to know this is how a real professional psychologist would think. Thank you for sharing .

This guy's voice is incredible.

This is literally going to change how I live my life

Thank you for this talk. This is the best advice I've heard in years. It really motivates me to start interacting again with the community around me.

Come acrossed this vid by accident, coincidentally I was having a bad day. I never knew I needed this to lighten up the burden I'm feeling. Thank you so much!

Thank you for sharing your decades of experience for no fee.

I’m a twin and I say that everything he said about twins is true. I love his storytelling.

I also watched your another video:" How to fix the broken heart". You are a great presenter and you motivated to me. I totally agree with you. The hurt in your mind is much more painful in physical. And we still won't care about it. This is a real matter. Thanks for your advice. It would help me and others.

Just what I needed to help myself. Searching and finding the right help, I am feeling better by the way he explained what I am going through. May God bless you for helping me and I am sure so many others just like me. Thank you so much.

2:25 "Why is it our physical health is so much more important to us than our psychological health?" That's the story of my life in a nutshell right there

I just want to say that this Ted talk helped me a lot when I was in a dark place, thank you so much. Also, if you're going through something, life is hard but just keep moving forward and growing as a person.

I wanted this ted talk so badly! I cried when he talked about loneliness. You can be around people, friends, family and feel disconnected and that creates loneliness.

Sharing this today with my social work class! Thank you Guy Winch. I first watched this a few years ago, happy to revisit this!!!

Dr. Winch speaks with great compassion and understanding. He seems like a good man.

this was amazing. i had to clap at the end, i really loved it.

I absolutely loved your Ted-talk winch. Thank you so much for this amazing speech..this sentence helped me do much, "Treat yourself like you'd expect from a truly good friend." 💛

Really thankful for this video. Going through a rough patch in life now and this video really helped big time. Hope everyone will be able to work out your issues somehow too

Loneliness is a monster. It's so much of a monster I can't recognize it anymore. Am I alone or am I lonely... I no longer can differentiate. As soon as I am surrounded by people and overwhelmed by conversation, I want to be alone. But once I achieve it, I don't know what to do anymore and feel very awkward.

''loneliness creates a deep psychological wund, one that distorts out percection and scrambles our thinking'' OMG! SO WORTH WATCHING! I

This is the most impressive speech that I've ever heard. I didn't realize protecting my own esteem can connect maintain mental health and not to enter the negative cycle. I wanna get this mindset and hope more people who are holding something negative can be saved by it.

I never beat myself up when I fail or get rejected I'm so grateful I never do the bad self talk THANK YOU MOM u teached me the strongest thing In the world 💙

Watching this again after having a really dark period of loneliness and suicidal thoughts makes a lot of sence.

his voice and storytelling are a emotional first aid as it is! everyone should hear his good message! 👍🏼

This was a very good short easy listen. It has so much knowledge and information packed into it. It really hits the heart and makes me realize why I am the way I am sometimes

This video is what everyone should be watching. It’s as it says in the video ”ideas worth spreading”. Indeed. I loved this a lot, the things he said made me think of a lot of things. Thank you a lot!💜

"We don't have failures. We have "Happy Accidents." -of course Bob Ross

Looks like I just found the most important video of the century.

Had to watch this for my University level communications class and at the same time, was coincidentally having a conversation with a friend going through a tough divorce. This is an excellent video and I sincerely appreciate the message it has successfully delivered.

No matter how many times I listen to this talk, no matter how much time has lapsed, It always conveys the message I need at that moment in time.

WHY AM I CRYING, THIS WAS BEAUTIFUL!!!!!

I love his tone of voice. He can have a great career in recording audio-books if he wants a change from patients! Not to mention this is one of the best ted talks I have watched.

Came here only for assignment purpose but this whole 17 minutes was worth watching. Loved his way of explaining!

Your emotional to physical analogies are so easy to follow and relate to. Thanks so much for making this videos.

His voice keeps reminding me of Kurzgezagt ^_^

Man the timing of this coming on my feed... It's my birthday, n I'm crying.. n this video.. thanks UKposts

I truly loved this and needed this! Such a blessing to learn about his twins recovery🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 Thank you💜