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Waffle House lighting a cigarette is definitely the most on brand thing that happened here.

"I throw rocks or chairs at customers that need to go home." Classic lmao

BJ's casually not wanting to serve their namesake.

Never thought I'd see the day that Applebee's is the voice of reason.

Cracker Barrel: “We do have crackers.” Waffle House: “He ain’t lying.” Spat out my drink

I still remember the time we were “fine dining” at Olive Garden and there were a couple of REAL Italian guys in the booth behind us…we don’t speak Italian so I’m sure we missed a lot, but I can still see the incredulous looks on their faces as they read the menu and their uproarious laughter when their food arrived.

I truly don’t understand how Hooters survived the pandemic when most every restaurant went carry out only. Who orders Hooters to go?!

Absolutely Top Shelf. Matt's acting with the looking back and forth to the other characters while he's monologuing is professional level technique. This content is definitely a cut above. Thanks Matt!

I loved Bdubs … “we’re basically a Best Buy that’s sells food.”

"We have a few varieties of shrooms available..." - perfectly delivered line, laughing my butt off

The Olive Garden is where my mom took me to a “nice dinner” and told me about the birds and the bees-complete with diagrams she drew on pink and blue paper and tears on my mom’s part. Our poor waiter.

Aussie living in Texas. We used to joke that the host at Outback Steakhouse would hit the panic button under the bar because Actual AustraliansTM were there 😆... but the food was still pretty dang good tbf.

"Do I want to know what's under that logo?" "No you don't." I almost spit out my Dr. Pepper! Thanks, Matt!!

I love the idea of Applebee’s serving bees.

True story (and somewhat sad) I proposed to my wife at an Applebees in 2004. We were literally the only customers in there so we got applause from the 2 servers, the bartender, and a few kitchen staff.

This really made my Friday. I laughed so hard, especially Red Lobster calling Applebees a liar.

😂😂 "No you do not." 😂😂 the ending is amazing 👏

HIGHLY recommend that you are not in the process of drinking something while watching this.

I would never call the Red Lobster cheddar biscuits “sad”!

Matt, you owe me a new keyboard. I just snorted at the BJ"s comment and spewed my drink all over. Oh my gosh, this whole video was hilarious. Made my day, week, and month!

3:08, I broke down laughing because I ABSOLUTELY loved red lobster’s bread buns!😂

Yessss! Everyone looks at me like I'm Crazy whenever I say Texas Roadhouse is from Little Old Indiana... But it's TRUE!!! 😁

I love that I can hear the air conditioner in the background of a couple of these cuts. And then you can see where Matt is SUFFERING. Matt, just bite the bullet and turn on the AC. We don't want you to be sweaty!!

We moved from Texas to California 20 years ago. My dad and I went to a Texas roadhouse for that taste of home. They had beans in their chili, and they had Mr Pibb and not Dr Pepper. And the only fried item I recall on the menu was the chicken fried chicken that wasn't very good. I still remember my dad asking the waitress, "Ma'am, have the owners of this place ever been to Texas?" I have never been back.

The man is brilliant. What a talent. This is almost constant laugh out loud one liners. Good On Ya.

I love when you do the if ( ) could talk videos. They are always hilarious.

That was incredible. As a 20+ hospitality survivor and a person with general disdain of anything chain and not local, this was perfect. I've worked at one of those places, and had friends and coworkers work at a few others. Spot on representation. Also huge shout out to the writing! And to Chef Mike.

The wild wings being a Best Buy got me at the end, another fantastic video. Thank you Matt.

Matt is a comedy genius!😅😂❤

I lost it with the special chair thing going on 1:47.

As someone who once tried a bourbon street steak, I'm pretty sure he nailed the recipe

I laughed aloud at the little house on the prairie comment but I genuinely love cracker barrel

To be fair ... there was a 30 minute wait at the local Applebee's recently, and the Bourbon Street steak was really good!

the mellow mushroom appearance killed me lmfao

The Buffalo Wild Wings is so true

Had an Australian co-worker come over here, he wanted to go to Outback, I tried to talk him out of it... As far as Foster's goes, he said "We export that shyte"

I'm Australian. I honestly can't think of what cuisine I'd put into an authentic Australian restaurant that's even half way fancy. We have the legendary sausage sandwich (grilled sausage + 1 slice of bread + onion + condiment) which you can get at our most popular hardware store for $2 for some reason, fairy bread (100's and 1000's on buttered bread almost exclusively served at kids birthday parties) and lamingtons (coconut sprinkles on a rectangular bite sized cake that's actually pretty awesome) for dessert. Yeah I'm one of the 50% that hates vegemite. I have one close relative who's into it and we're wondering if she got switched at the hospital. Everything else is either imported (we all love Thai food for some reason) or generic like grilled steaks or fresh seafood. We do now export kangaroo meat (almost no fat but very difficult to keep tender, has a slightly noticeable blood tang to it that I'm not super fond of) but you can't build a whole franchise on that.

Feel like there could have been more explored here, hoping we get a part 2 of even 3.

These are my favorite types of vignettes that you do!!!! Laugh out loud all the way through!!!

Imagine if this defunct restaurant could talk. My name is "Hometown Buffet" don't laugh at me. And don't look down your nose, I was a restaurant once and the all you can eat shrimp and chicken experiment failed due to the Hydra's 😋 that ate and ate with out end. Golden Corral don't snicker your next!!🤣😅 Matt that was a really funny video thank you!!

"We're basically a Best Buy that serves food" is the best description of Buffalo Wild Wings that I can think of!

This is some witty gold here. Well done.

As a Tampa native I was hoping for some joke about Outback being the family friendly local alternative to wing house, hooters and all the other boob themed restaurants in the Tampa Bay Area.

Should have included Huddle House so that there would be a three-way over the top rope battle royale with Waffle House and Cracker Barrel.

I smiled and laughed the whole way through that and I’m from the UK! Brilliant Matt ♥️👍

What? No mention of Buc-ees? Even though you have to eat the stuff in your car? Best line on BW3: “We’re just a Best Buy that serves food”. Classic!

"You're not even from Texas, are you?" "Southern Indiana!" 😂😂😂

Amazing Matt, you are a treasure! Bless Your Rank, If whatever Could Talk and your SEC commentary are some of the absolute best items on the web. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Okay, I spit up my drink at "gospel CD collection."

“He ain’t lying!” 😂🤣😂 that got me 😂

I just now saw this and it's easily one of the funniest things you've ever done. So many little moments past the halfway point, from " Y'all are a dark bunch" to the end was hilarious.

It’s a step up from fast food! Well, more of a sidestep, there’s places like Jersey Mike’s which are technically fast food, but don’t have a drive-thru. Which, by the way, Subway counts as fast food because they *had* a drive-thru.

Feel like IHOP or Denny's should have made an appearance since Waffle House did.

Love the video as always BUT, put out SEC Roll Call Week 0 soon please. I've been waiting all week for it LOL

I can't recall, but have we had the restaurant rolls discussion yet? Because I feel that we *sweet honey cinnamon rolls* should have that discussion.

Hey...I loved the bar at our Applebees...probably because I knew the bartender and rarely paid for beer 🤣🤣🤣

😂 that ending was THE BEST!! 🤣🤣🤣

"A toddler the size of a small mountain"!!! I almost died!!!

So many references, so many accurate depictions, but I think my favorite was the "We sell chairs" and "We throw chairs" bit between Cracker Barrel and Waffle House. Great stuff!!

I consider Introducing my Australian friends to Outback Steakhouse as an American pastime. Their reactions are priceless.

As a person who grew up going to the first Texas Roadhouse (it's 8 minutes from my house), I appreciate you saying SOUTHERN Indiana.... we are definitely not like the northern part of the state. Lol!! Also, no, I don't know why they named it Texas.... but would you go to Indiana Roadhouse?

PAINFULLY accurate.

At working literally LOLing! I’m embarrassed but it’s worth it!

The cook at the Murphy NC Waffle House was outside smoking when I showed up…. And followed me to take my order. Ya I would say the video got it correct.

Now do "if convenience stores could talk"

Applebee's claiming to be the leader...when no one really cares what they think or do... Accurate.

“You aint from Texas are you?….nope, southern Indiana” 😂😂😂 WELL DONE!

_Waffle House_ looks like he needs to check in with his PO.

I just love when you do these kind of things you are just so funny and so right lol

0:37 "Nope and you can stop asking" -BJ's Dude best joke I've heard in YEARS!!!

PLEASE Give us SEC Roll Call on Monday!!!!

Ahahahha ... so true. Hey Matt, will we see a new SEC Roll Call soon? Your work on those are just hilarious!

The most relateable thing I've watched in six months.

This by far as the best one you have ever done Matt I liked it fell out of my chair laughing when I saw you light that cigarette

Great start to my day! Thanks.😂😂

Applebees serves bread?!? Man it’s been a long time since I’ve ate there but I didn’t know they started doing that…

“No, you do not.” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

If only Olive Garden really did serve Mountain Dew. That would be heavenly.

This is great! Right when I thought it couldn't get any funnier, it did! Thanks, Matt for all the laughs!!

You did it again! Giggling like a dang fool over here !!! Thanks, Matt !😂

The backwards cowboy hat is hilarious and infuriating

BJ's " no not true stop asking" OMG lol

Nostalgia moment, stepping down into the bar area at Applebee’s is like stepping down to the lower part of the stage for a physical challenge on Double Dare 😂

Well you can take your child to everyone of these, except Hooters, well some of them depending on what time of day it is.

Dadgum it, Matt, I literally don't have an ass left because i done laughed it off 🤣😂🤣

Nice of Mellow Mushroom to drop in, really been craving those pretzels lately

waffle house was good with out being over the top. thank you Matt

I love how absolutely wholesome Cracker Barrel is. They've been building one where I live and it's going to be opening soon (sometime this month, I think). I'm excited to give them a try.

Texas road house was a surprise. I’m from southern Indiana. That place is ALWAYS packed! Oh and there are so many peanut shells on the floor it sound like you are walking through tall grass. But there is nothing Texas about it. It’s where all the golfers, businessmen, and churchgoers go to wait in a line that lasts a fortnight. Lines normally take 1 hour minimum. Services isn’t great…

The confident, unashamed, "No you do not" at the end got me.

Matt, this was hilarious! I loved it. Thank you and please keep up the great fun! I'm always excited when I get a notification about a new video from you. I know I'm going to be smiling and laughing. God bless you and your family,

Hilarious as always! 😂😂❤

Buffalo Wild Wings is "basically a Best Buy that serves food" 😂

“No you do not.” 😂

Matt’s just killin it lately!!🤗❤️🐝

You are a riot. There is a joe hunter on Facebook that looks to be copying your work. Just FYI. You deserve everything for your creativity.

Good job Matt, now we all get ready for Monday and the sad Gator fan....

"Do I *want* to know what's underneath that logo"? "No, you do NOT". 😂😂😂❤

As with all your videos, this stuff is comic-gold. I had to pause and LOL out loud when you made the joke about BJ's. awesome from start to finish = again, as usual.