The cousin that asked for a $1,000 and then quickly paid it back is awesome

When you come into money, the biggest mistake is to tell family and friends. If they know you have money, people come out of the woodwork with a hand out

OP is literally an angel in human form. She literally took care of 90% of the financial burdens of her closest relatives and even then got treated horribly.

They are totally not the jerk. The family was being lazy, demanding, and abusive. Special compliments to her husband for being an absolute chad the whole time 👍🏻

You drew the line, they crossed it, there are consequences. She did nothing wrong

the fact her family tried to physically threaten her to pay them was absolutely disgusting. They didn't bat two eyes when they were in dire help but LITERALLY the second they heard that she had money they came running for the hills and when she refused they tried to brute force the money out of her. Talk about a bullshit family

As the son of these parents who pay for a lot of their siblings stuff, I totally get where this woman is coming from. The worst part is that after a while they don’t even have gratitude for the things you’ve done for them and even expect it to the point it’s no longer a question but a demand. I don’t understand the psychology behind why people become so ungrateful and clueless after a while but just recently my mom got into an argument with her mom because she got mad at my mom for not paying some stuff for my uncle, and she said things like “You guys have money so why don’t you just help him out?” Ironically no other siblings ever help my grandmother or struggling uncle out, it’s always my mom paying for medical treatments and pulling them out of debt, she even gave them a blueberry farm as a gift that she no longer wanted to deal with, but it’s never enough apparently. We have another uncle who’s a doctor and he treats everyone like sht, never gives anyone money and never visits my grandma. Yet recently that she’s been mad at my mom she’s been complaining about my mom while saying she’s grateful to my doctor uncle even though he’s never actually intervened or helped anyone. My mom had to learn the hard way that people don’t care about your help or good deeds, she stopped giving everyone money, and took away the cars she lent my struggling uncle (which btw were in horrible condition, he didn’t take any sort of care for her cars). Right now they’re pissed at her for setting up boundaries, yet are completely enamoured by other relatives who never help or visit them.

You are Not the jerk. When you give to people like this they will always come back for more.

This person did A LOT for their family. More than enough. I'm surprised to see people pay this much for extended family.

Do not pay for them anymore. Anything that happens once, like harassment, win WILL continue. You are in no way wrong, and very brave for standing your ground.

This story is a perfect encapsulation of why money can ruin a family, not say that it can ruin all families, but just goes to show that money is such a powerful and corruptive force that is not to be treaded lightly. I've always said that if I win the lottery or have a huge sum of money given to me, I will not tell a signal soul cause situations like this

Family isn’t always an Excuse. -A very Wise person

Her husband was amazingly supportive, I wish more people like him existed

I had a similar experience. When I told them all my money was gone. It was the only way I could break the greed. I never heard from anyone again. Only one member asked if i needed help, That was the only person I respected and helped them out during hard times after it all went quiet.

That sounds like a good husband he didn’t even classify the OP’s money as his and hers he just classified it as her’s, truly amazing 17:46

this is the kind of person i want to be, one of the supportive members, that will allways be by ur side no matter what.

This story is a perfect example of why I'd pretend to disappear in the view of my "peer group" and family in the event that I ever win the lottery or get into a well-paying job, since I know they'd crawl to me and basically demand that I pay back debts they invoked long after taking care of me. Family stops being family once they know they can exploit you and it makes me sad.

The fact that the aunt and uncle wanted 4.8 million dollars in college funds alone is shocking. That's not even including how much the holiday home they were also demanding cost-

This is why you don’t tell your family you have money.

I’m sorry but in part 2 did the extended family really ask for 800k for each of their 6 kids, and a vacation home? Because I think that pretty absurd to ask for 4.8 million with no intent of paying any of it back

1) based upon how much money they gave out and people were demanding I think “a lot of money” is an understatement 😅 2) these are the most entitled, infuriating people I have ever heard of. If a family member came up to me and paid for my mortgage and Childs college I would treat them better than Jesus i swear. I would kiss the very ground they walked upon.

Crazy how she doesn’t even mind spending that much on family lots of millionaires don’t even do that

This is ridiculous, OP is so generous and the family’s demands are crazy, but not only that, she has done so much for them and a lot of them are being so rude. Good on the people who weren’t crazy and were very grateful.

Wow, that husband’s family was something else

This woman is way to nice I can’t even believe her family did that to her she deserves better and I’m glad her husband was on her side

OP should probably look into hiring private security for herself and her family given the way the that one uncle acted.

Does everyone just love how they make the sister inlaw sounds like dobby the house elf 😂

Every person who was at the house for the last conflict needs a restraining order slapped on them. Also, your money, your decision. Period.

She’s not the jerk at all. She sacrificed so much and worked so hard for that money and instead of keeping all that money to her and her husband and children, she decided to pay their mortgages and collage money. Demanding for more money after that and going as far as to strike her is insane. She is certainly not the jerk

after all the family started crying for money, i would’ve just said that everyone bled me dry and now i have to sell my home and ask for money just to see who actually gives it.

So many entitled people need to learn the rules of life. 1. Life is hard 2. Life is not fair 3. You are entitled to nothing 4. Be happy if you have anything 5. Everything you have can be taken away

I've always told people if I ever get money, the first thing you ask for you're going to get; and you'll never see a dime of anything else so you better get what you need first.

I got more and more furious with this story, she paided from college funds, mortage, holidays, down payments, financial aids, and they still have the audacity to berate her with calls and hate messages, intrude into her house and physically, emotionally, mentally abuse her, if I was her, I'd demand every penny back, disown all of them and cut contact for atleast a few years. Honestly, her husband was really great about the situation, helping, defending and breaking relationships with his family is tough, I honestly really think she should sue all of them.

The opposite happened in my family. My brother insisted I get most of the inheritance. He had a good job and I was busy taking care of our mom. He even made sure I had things I needed for 3 months after our mom passed.

They paid them 1000s of dollars, bad mouthed them, and then were surprised they wouldn’t further pay for THEIR vacation.

Your first mistake was opening your wallet. No good deed goes unpunished. Family and money do not mix.

So she technically gave 500,000 in college funds or more and paid for a whole vacation and that sister in law still wanted more 😂

I would pay for a house for my mom. beyond that everyone can take a hike. in no way shape or form is anyone guilting me into a damn thing.

Bro if a family threatens you with violence for a fucking vacation, they ain’t family chef

I just came back to this kind of content after about 3 years and listening again its really nice its calming and it makes you think really.

She is not a jerk, she was the one who even thought about setting aside money for her nephews and nieces and just demanding someone else to pay for such an expensive vacation and along with multiple college fees containing more then $100,000 is just ridiculous. Along with the fact that were still in the pandemic this is a lot of money wasted that could be used to help the family out

This lady goes through so much just for money and she still so nice to them PLUS that family seems very large, and she showed massive dominance by punching that uncle

Stories like this make me glad for how good and close my family is.

As someone who struggles speaking up for themselves, I couldn't be more proud of her for putting her foot down.

Just because OP has the money doesnt mean her family or in laws deserve it. She's better off without them.

When OP said 35k for that family trip I made my girlfriend laugh so dang hard because I said in the deepest voice she had ever heard from me “I could buy a car with that shit”

It's insane how family can be when someone or people in the family have lots of money. Good for OP for refusing to just give it away. *No one* is *"entitled"* to anything. *No one* *"deserves"* that money.

the fact that anyone thinks that you even owed them the college tuition or mortgage is crazy you owe them nothing the fact that they even asked for more is crazy

"It's like the more money we come across the more problems we see." 100% not a jerk. You get what you earned. Period. That is why there are workers and there are entrepreneurs.

My father's best lesson to me was to never tell people, even family and friends, how much I make. The best outcome is I'll be seen as tacky or prideful. The most likely outcome would be everyone comes looking for a handout.

Girl I hope that you stood your ground. People who don't appreciate you, don't deserve what you do for them

I heard this story like 7 months ago and It's still mind blowing to me that someone would ask for 35 k from somebody else and then say " we deserve it " you deserve someone else's money ? How ? How exactly do you deserve 35k of someone else's money ?

“Am I the jerk?” Anyone who says yes deserves to go to hell.

I don't think any *rational* person could call OP a jerk. She didn't 'divide the family over not giving out her money.' Money isn't even the issue here it's greed and entitlement. OP was more than generous with her savings and she's the only person genuinely entitled to the money.

For the first story you are definitely not the jerk. You were incredibly generous and kind to your family and shouldn’t be forced into paying for trips of others who don’t deserve it and don’t respect you, you did the right thing.

OMG, I can't get over how entitled they felt about OP's money!! I came from a lower middle class family and was an electircian througout most of my life until I had an accident that left me disabled. We struggled to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table. One thing was I had a small home built (only about 1000 square feet) on 2 acres of land and only owed less then a year on it when my younger brother graciously paid off the rest of our loan. We did not expect this and was greatly relieved when he did this for us and we still greatly appreciate what he did for us. He has worked hard for his money all his life and has a good job in a highly competitive market. He tells us things like he could have retired comfortably a decade ago but we have no clue how much he is worth and frankly it is none of our business. He has taken some awesome vacations and sent us pictures from the places he has been around the world and we are happy for him because his job is so demanding that he needs to have time to get away from it and just relax. He once paid for us to go on an adventure with him and it was an awesome experience. He did it out of the goodness of his heart and we love him dearly even if he didn't do things like that for us. It makes me sick to here people demanding money from realatives just because they have it like they should be entitled to it. IF they give you a gift appreciate it and don't think you should deserve anything else because unless you earn it, you don't!

This person has just earned my full respect for speaking her mind and doing it respectfully

Holy shite, my grandparents HELPED me pay for uni, and I WAS SOBBING because I was so happy. What is wrong with people.

The part when the elder slapped her right on the face,and she FALCON PUNCHED the elder,got me crazy.Either way,best one of these EVER

How could anyone be mad ??? She's literally like one of the best people I've heard of she did everything for them I wish I even had family

I'm 32 and already know how scummy my "family" can be behind that "good-and-nice-person-we-are-all-loving-supporting-family" faces. AND I'M NOT EVEN MIDDLE CLASS Good thing I'm considered the "poor bastard", so nobody will ask for me when I dissapear.

The fact that she thought she would get a 35,000 thousand dollar birthday gift is crazy😂

Love how the husband backs her up and claims its her money and she decides instead of making the money his

I just find it hard to believe an entire family feels that untitled to someone else’s wealth. I have plenty of family who are quite well off, but I know for sure that i’m not entitled to a penny and would never ask them for anything unless I were desperate. Then I’m sure they would help.

No way in hell is she the jerk. She has done *WAY* too much for them and yet receive a complete negativity and demanding of large amount of cash for them. In all honesty, I would at least start slowly cutting strings, and tell my closest and trustworthy relative or my spouse. Even if it may look bad, distancing your family from the negative side of the family tree is sometimes helpful, it kinda forces the negative family to look apon their actions and hopefully make them rethink and try to repair that string you slowly cutted.

This person is NOT the jerk, if I had that money I’ll give some to my close friends but I CERTAINLY WILL NOT give ALL of it to a person who treats me similar to less than nothing.

I never understand why just because you're "family" means you automatically deserve anything.

I know this exact situation when my father passed away and left me everything, enough for myself children grandchildren,Etc, to live comfortable for the rest of our lives, and on… but my family didn’t like that and sued me… I destroyed them in court and long story short, I blocked them from our lives. No loss, they showed their true colours when the chips were down, and old dogs never learn new tricks. I had to put restraining orders on a few of my relatives, once the word got around I wasn’t bothered anymore. You cant give them a dime because it’ll never stop and it will wreck your life. This lady would be better off without them in her life, by the sounds of it. Definitely not a jerk, in hind sight being to kind has got her into some bad places.

Whenever someone has money when they didn’t, that’s when the wolves come out. OP is not the jerk. She did as much as she felt comfortable with and to be honest, did more than I would’ve. I am a kind person and I would help people if they need it, but I am not knowledgeable about money enough to plan that out.

Family almost always take advantage of family. And then try to blame it on you when you finally put a stop to things.

The fact that the kids under stood their parents faults (first half) answers the question if your a jerk.

I swear to God you are a very good person. I can't believe what your family is doing. I wish you well and hope to get richer. I want to say I love you for what I did to your family who helped you. Sorry for the spelling errors, English is not my native language

Such audacity! It's true that family should "help"each other. When they really need one. it means life and death situation not for luxury!! Violent is so wrong too. They can ask for your help but have no rights to make demands. Stay strong!

You absolutely are NOT the jerk. Stay strong and don't give them a dime. Also yeah I'd spend the money on my immediate family, My spouse, Our parents, Our children. That's it.

not a jerk at all for not paying for their vacation. I've grown up in a middle income family, but in terms of vacations we just go camping out in the middle of nowhere or on the coast, since we lived in a coastal state. All it would cost were just enough for semi-decent food, gas for a small portable gas stove thing, and gas for the vehicle to get there. That was it. If they really wanted to go on a vacation, they could've just done that to be honest. Camping in the middle of the woods or near a coast (if you have access to one) is nice. Not fancy or whatever, but it's not meant to be. It's about the experience and the time spent with your family/friends that makes a vacation worth it in the first place. Clearly, these people missed the memo. - I personally would rather go camping in an extremely uncomfortable place with family/friends as opposed to going to somewhere super fancy without any. Also, the cheaper the better.

Holy this story was chaotic. I’m very proactive at how OP dealt with her sister-in-law and how supportive OP’s husband was

Not a jerk sounds like she was as respectful as possible and had every right to say no and even consulted her partner (who's family it was) for advice. She did super kind things. No good dead goes unpunished sadly.

Girl did more than she need to And sister in law kept being greedy for someone's money Personally i wouldn't give 35k dollars as a gift even i have billion dollars to someone badmouthing me and around her she did what every person would do so she wasn't the jerk

this is what some people would say: _greed will get you NOWHERE!_

The OP (Original Poster) was very generous and it is very sad that she has gone through all of this with these ungrateful family members.

I don't care if it staged, it's just interesting tn listen to a story so well made

The fact that even the father in law was on his side is good because the sister is totally out of line

This is why you don’t tell anyone in your family. And if you decide to help some, have them sign a contract, or legal documentation under threat of suing to not tell anyone they got money from you.

Everyone except the extended family and the sister/brother/mother in law are absolutely amazing people, the Husband is supportive, the children are grateful for the OP, and even the father in law is probably disappointed in what his daughter is doing. (Also that one guy who borrowed money and payed it back quick yeah he is the perfect example of a responsible person)

I don't understand why they said, "they deserved it". As a family, this is not a valid reason to ask a rich member to pay for everything. Everyone has to work hard and earn their own money. So be grateful when all your mortgages and college funds are paid for out of goodwill.

Here’s the reason why you should be nice to the people that are nice to you, and only those who are nice to you

To be honest, OP sounds so rich it doesn't feel otherworldly to ask for a 35k vacation considering she's blessing 7 nieces and nephews with 800k funds each, aside from her own children and paid-off mortgages. ASK, mind you. The demands and confrontations are simply insane.

OP sounds like a literally saint, and the shit that happened to her she did not deserve. And I hope she files restraining orders to everyone involved in cornering her at her own house.

The ultimate type of parents “keeping your money safe” when you’re a kid

The cockroaches come out when someone gets paid

Definitely not the jerk, and I love how the husband is supportive

I’m with the op, if I had that much money, I would definitely help my family that needs it, but not the ones that treat me poorly. She is right, do what she did and make money if you need it

After you’ve already done all that for the family then totally disowning them all is fully acceptable

You did way more than most peoples wildest dreams. The fact the family feels they can threaten and bully you in to spending a fortune on them is ridiculous. It would be like paying a blackmailer money, they would just keep coming back asking for more and more every time they wanted something else. You definitely did the right thing and a lot more politely than I would have been.

As a general rule: you owe taking care of your spouse and kids - but no one else! An argument can be made for taking care of your parents as well. But you DO NOT have to take care of anyone else. Anything else you give to anyone is a gift out of your generosity as you see fit. If you choose to give it all to charity or burn it in the backyard that is entirely your decision - not anyone elses.

This story is why I’ll never tell anyone of I ever get money, “family” comes out of the woodwork for it.

bro, I would file a restraining order against every person there, I really hope that family sees this video and possibly can finally see how STUPID they were

honestly the OP is such a good person. She is. GOOD person through and through because many people would keep the benefit to their children and not tell a soul outside their own family unit and be the rich aunt by themselves. The OP tried to distribute the wealth in the best way possible but still was meet with this. the fact that she got slapped by the uncle - I CANT.

10 stars to the OP, in my experience, you don't just demand something because it could be done but there are more important things that money like that could put to use, bills, mortgages, etc. I approve of this OP's stand against her family that is so demanding.

disown them all. Physical harm is above and beyond. Remember you choose who you consider close family.