Instead of telling people to pray, he told people to pay

Those dang homophones. Instead of praying on people, he spent his time preying on people. Such an easy mistake to make as a pastor.

Hate when that happens. Sometimes the Angels singing just muffles gods voice.

Hehe I'm the 666th like (:

not to mention, he thought he was being a prophet when in reality he was getting a profit from people paying him

lmfaoooo

This pun is artful

underrated af comment

this is an impeccable joke bravo

HEHE 😭😭

Normally it’s just “God told me to…” then a new cult starts. The “I misheard God thing is pretty” hilariously pathetic 😂

Honestly, people should just take accountability for their actions 💀 💀

"the devil made me do it (but i also kinda wanted to)" - will wood circa 2020

@@DOCTORWHIMSY That's what I thought of, too 😭 😭

but i also kinda wanted to

For 2000 years this last sentence has been left out of countless copies of the Bible due to scholars being unable to identify what INDXcoin could mean, but today, we now understand the true meaning of this passage!

@@Shoulderpads-mcgee the biggest upset in theological academia since the discovery of the gnostic gospels!!

and yet large swathes of christians are obsessed with the rich or trying to be rich. fuckers literally invented virtue signalling.

Its funny how christians into all those new get-rich-quick-schemes try to warp their minds around such verses...

@ntoMori In Brazil a pastor was caught in one of these schemes but was pure insanity like he promised that if you invested 25 bucks on him you would get millions back or even an octillion, and people invested +150 millions before he was caught

If god didn’t want me to gamble then why’d he give me this crippling addiction, huh? Checkmate atheists.

​@@Thebees21Good point. I think god wants me to start drinking again.

@@jakethepillowsnake5302and god wants me to drive afterwards

That’s like a man.

@@jakethepillowsnake5302Jesus made water into wine, I think so too

unprecedented, truly

There's always a first.

You're being sarcastic right😭

Religion being used as a front for evil, who would have even dreamed of such a thing!! 😬😬😬😬😬

@@spelt722yeah obviously 😭

She did not force it on him but she was the transgressor.

him saying “this just happened” is giving aaron turning to moses and saying “this golden calf idol just popped out of the fire fully formed idk what to tell you”

@@user-yq1yh9rt8f Honestly I don't even blame Eve for the apple thing. She and Adam were completely oblivious to what was right or wrong because that's how they were supposed to exist, so her taking the apple should've been expected. It's like never teaching your child what's bad and then they do the bad. Like, what did you think was gonna happen, Big G? It is kind of funny that they were punished and cast out of the Garden of Eden for the sin of ''defying'' God and... gaining knowledge. With how a lot of christian leaders can be with their cults, that feels poetic XD

*pomegranate

​@user-yq1yh9rt8f so close! the issue here is adam is shifting responsibility to somebody else

Oh there absolutely is. As a Christian, the Bible warns about and condemns corrupt leaders, politicians, and corrupt churches multiple times, showing it's unfortunately always been common and an easy target for predatory people or those who let power get to their head easily.

There is a special punishment for sure. They are held to a higher standard than everyone else

i usually call them pharisees

@@user-om1jc3vt9t I still remember the "I don't wanna be a pharisee, cuz they ain't fair, ya see?" From the "I just wanna be a sheep, bah bah bah bah" song from church camp 15 years ago 🫠

Do not take the Lord’s name in vain isn’t about saying ‘god dammit,’ it’s about shit like this. Big JC himself was VERY clear about monetizing the church being evil, too.

That’s what we do at our Lord and Savior Logan Paul’s church.

How do you mishear an entire conversation 😭

I mean, not like people have free will. Where in the Bible does it say...oh wait

He’s literally blaming God

​@@alexisb3829 Thats got to be beyond blasphemous lmfao. At least blame Satan like a real man

"Guys I don't know what happened I blinked and the body was on the floor just like that and I suddenly had a gun, I have no clue what happened but that's crazy!"

It’s the Christian equivalent of “source: trust me bro”

That’s not a good thing to be joking about..😟

@@TarrynGamesMC tax evasion is my favourite 🤩😍

​@@TarrynGamesMC It's the perfect thing to joke about because it's hilarious. Anyone can just be like "God said so" and give no explanation and people will just be like "oh okay carry on" lol

@@pissapocalypse But as a Christian, we aren’t supposed to be lying, especially about God telling us to do things that are falsehood because it’s misleading others.

Isnt... Isnt the whole point of being a pastor/priest/anywhere in those higher echelons of the clergy to have very little in terms of physical possessions to better devote yourself to serving the Lord in every waking moment? You cant serve God and mammon, my guy.

​@@BlazingKhioneus I think most churches only care for mammon nowadays I always will remember that a pastor asked for money so he could buy a private jet for himself, in my country one asked money to buy a private island with a mansion and now the congregation need to pay for taxes of said mansion because supposedly you can marry there so is part of the community and the worse part if you point out that he is just scamming you're called the anti-Christ and that you should take care of your life by his followers

Jesus loves you. Capital g

@@username11346what

@@username11346ima touch you so fucking hard 😊😊

Gesus Goves Gou

@@Mafuyuassahinalmfao

Oh my god 😭😭😭😭

Oml

I'm shocked, *shocked*, that when this man found religion his first thought was "hmm... Now how can I exploit this for profit?"

Poor guy just keeps mishearing God. I've been there, and you can only say "what?" so many times before you have to just smile politely and say "haha yeah!"

@@sammyjones8279 they told him to find god and he took it personally

Seed money and prosperity gospel is such a corruption of religion, its really saddening

depending on your religious views tithing can be viewed as a ponzi scheme too lol

Well, no, not at all. Tithing has no promise of return on investment, it’s purely handing over (traditionally ten percent) of your income to whatever church you belong to. There’s no promise of any money coming back to you, which is a core tenet of a Ponzi scheme.

@@IzzyExistnttithing is so interesting… especially christian tithing? do christian’s give their tithing to the church itself? i’m a jew and we just donate money directly to charity for tithing

Thank you for making me laugh today.

God in the bible gives very clear commands and a how-to-guide on how to own slaves, "I think God is telling me to own.." oh wait this one doesn't work as well.

​@@cosas_de_gatosi agree, god don't exit, the bible was written by men.

​@@GentM2015God is not telling you to own slaves🗣🔥🔥⁉️ God is regulating slavery ⁉️⁉️🗣🔥🔥

@@johanahonen8627well you’re correct about one thing, the Bible was written by men… most of the New Testament was written by Jesus’ 12 disciples who witnessed everything and followed God.

This really happened, I was there

can confirm, i was the boat

Can confirm, I was the animals

can confirm, i was god

Can confirm I was Lucifer

That would be crazy

Totallyy unheard of

Pshhh couldn't be

I feel there's a difference between a church taking money for the church work itself and a priest/pastor/pop/whatever they're called in Anglicanism taking his community money for himself.

hey at least the catholics build a realy cool looking church with it

Always reminds me of the phrase "sowing your oats" and kinda grosses me out

Is pay per blessing like old school Catholic indulgences? What a wild thing for any Christian denomination to swing back around to

Catholic indulgences were to pay money in exchange for getting forgiven of your sins. The modern evangelical "prosperity gospel" "sowing seeds" scam is giving money to the church in exchange for greater monetary wealth supposedly being divinely bestowed on you later. The former is robbing believers when the believers want to avoid going to the wrong place after their life is over but do not realize that the way to achieve that according to their own religion is not to buy salvation, and the latter is robbing believers who are greedy and want huge amounts of money but do not realize that 1. What they are doing is the exact opposite of the religion they purport to follow, and 2. That they achieved having less money by being scammed out of their money, so are getting the exact opposite of what they crave, which is more money. The only people who get rich from the "prosperity gospel" are the preachers who take money from all of their scam targets, otherwise known as their followers and church members. Just like how in the 1800s "big tent revival" craze, 90% of preachers were atheists who just loved scamming money from all the believers they could fool into giving them money, most "prosperity gospel" preachers do not believe in God or anything supernatural at all, and love taking money away from believers that they can get away with scamming. This is just criminal scam territory, not genuine religion territory, even though a central part of this scam is to turn the targets of the scam into the most fanatical believers on the planet so they never question those scamming them or what they themselves are doing in their life.

Beautiful

Aw darn it.

same here man.. it happens all the time! 😟

It's so easy to do! Could happen to anyone honestly 🤷‍♀️

yes! I thought I was the only one!!

Sometimes I trip and it happens to me... it's so annoying

The lord works in mysterious ways 🙏🏽 😂

Me, the one voice in the crowd, the outlier: we hate you Danny

we love you danny

We love you Danny

​@@v.xien. No we love Danny and you will love Danny and you will like it.

​@@v.xien.SHAME THE HERETIC

the dcu. I like it

real

@@ChinchillaJimmy the GregCU

@@xamuska209 yes the greg cinematic universe perfect

@@xamuska209 DCU sounds better.

The rich man won't enter heaven

​@LuXClypse Hey, I'm THIS CLOSE to fitting this camel through a needle, then just watch me!

For real!!

Poor Jesus man, he was a poor Palestinian carpenter who hung out with the poor, disabled and homeless, and he’s being used by white Americans to sell… crypto?

@@LuXClypse”it is more likely that a camel will enter the eye of the needle than a rich man will enter heaven” Luke 18:25

this is my favorite comment ever

CRYING

“i think we ALL sin”

i met victoria justice in an airport bathroom as a baby

'Look I made some mistakes...you made some mistakes...things were said...let's just all move on and call it even'

Please it will be of benefit if you share more of your educational business lessons and ideal fact that's working recently

You have done great for yourselves. I understand the fact that tomorrow isn't promised to anyone, but investing today is a hard thing to do for me now because I have no idea of how and where to invest in. I would be happy if you could advise me based on how you went about yours, as I am ready to go the passive income path.

Thanks guys, I would like to be your friend to achieve this, I keep losing my funds while trying on my own and finding a trustworthy personnel to help out it also appears to be nearly impossible. This is extremely annoying

My advice to you all is that you shouldn’t just venture on any asset for the sake of it, I’ve come to understand that the recent dip trail is everything.

The pandemic came and taught everyone the importance of having multiple stream of income, unfortunately having a nice paying job doesn't mean you are financial secured anymore. So we all need to put in an extra-income earning chance, like investments.

Same, Same. Though, nobody was smart enough to realize that paying 10% of their income was totally for profit

😂😂😂! I promise I'm only laughing at the word play but not at what it obviously means! The word play was hilarious, the reality of all the hurt people is f****** disgusting!

I grew up Mormon and honestly prophet is for profit

as someone who also grew up mormon, i dont even think "prophet" was ever distinct from "profit". theyre one in the same, i think 😔

My mom was Mormon n my grandparents are still in it, its definitely an issue!

His lawyer is facepalming so hard, I'll bet.

3 danny 3 furious is an immaculate name for a third channel

what about "danny 4ever after" for the fourth channel?

Jesus loves you

Underrated comment I hope it gets pinned and Danny says “😎”

danny tokyo drift *

The Conning: The Jesus Made Me Do It

The Coinjuring

God told me to do it

Christian⛑⛑⛑According to the Bible it's somebody that trust Paul's gospel or what Paul calls "MY GOSPEL" three times in the scriptures⛑⛑⛑JESUS CHRIST gave Paul this gospel exclusively from heaven which nobody preached before Paul to be saved today for the church age❗ (Galatians 1:11-12 KJV) But do you know Paul's gospel ❓Do you know that you will be judged if you don't know it and believe in it❓ (Romans 2:16 KJV) Do you know if you don't know it you will without a doubt burn in hell forever according to the King James Bible ❓ Do you care❗ If not scroll on & we'll see you at the judgment before you get casted into hell forever❗But, If you do care and aren't sure at all if you know the gospel found in Paul to be saved according to what he calls "MY GOSPEL," (2Tim2:9/Rom2:16/Rom16:25 KJV Only) Then come press on the "Pauls Gospel" Highlight on my page❗ YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED❗ YOU are now permanently guilty if you die without it OR SOON TO BE INNOCENT if YOU go check it out and believe❗❗

@@montymintsthis is so funny

I'm not surprised 🤣🤣🤣

iconic comment

I was just thinking God set him up 😂 or tried his hand at a pyramid scheme

I heard god tell me to do the crip walk one time but now that you mention, he was probably telling me to do charity work

you just unlocked a new philosophical question for me is god good at crypto?!

​@@lrizzardwell, if you believe in the doctrine he is the best at everything, including pooping, fucking and killing everyone in a flood (except Noah etc)

@@lrizzard Nobody is "Good at crypto" it's just gambling with a different name, like stocks, or "sports betting."

​@bazzfromthebackground3696 are you acoustic? For real. Like, did your acoustic brain actually prevent you from understanding it was a joke?

@@kitten-whisperer Did you just ask someone if they were acoustic? Like a guitar? 💀

Took me a moment to see what you did there.

The guy, sitting on a box filled with chair parts from ikea that he has yet to build: I may have misheard that

LMAOOO

Check out the channel Zach Star Humself, when he does skits with God, God is kinda like a fratbro. He's respectfully disrespectful to a lot of different backgrounds and is super funny all around.

Least delusional Santa denier:

have you ever seen Danny and Robert in the same room? i didn't think so. wake up, sheeple! 😤

The Santa Clause 😩

I think you're forgetting that Danny IS Santa.

I dont believe in Danny. I think it's just Robert in a Danny meat suit.

Actually it would be 12 because 11th is love people as he loved people

hell yeah

now THIS is what i’m talking about

So real ctlr

That one was good😂

Aight bet

He pulls out a ukulele halfway through the video 😭

even funnier is i dont think mans ever actually apologized bahaha (also quite youtuber-esque tbh)

@@raccoonray He's on the ToXiC gOsSiP TrAiN!!! Got a one way ticket to Hell. 😈

@@raccoonraythe toxic gospel train

@@marrbeearThis made me spit all over my phone

god put us on this earth to get on that CRYPTO GRINDSET

@@fartchungusRAHHH CRYPTO GRINDSET RAHHHH 🔥🔥🔥

@@fartchungus WERE GETTING SCAMMED AND LIVING ON THE STREET WITH THIS ONE 🗣️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

In all seriousness, as a Christian, scamming is a sin, so this guy is legit acting against God lol

Then shift the blame 😎😎 You think God would've given him a sign to tell him he misunderstood if he ever did talk to him like that

I'm agnostic, and I've always hated that line. Someone once told me like "god told me this and that about you and your situation" and I'm like oh? He did? You're sure? He came to YOU because he wanted ME to know something instead of trying to come to me himself? And it just so happens that he told you everything you already thought anyway? Fascinating. Surely there's no possible way you misinterpreted whatever message he sent you. Surely.

I used to think God talked to me in my mind and told me to stop being religious because the guilt was making every part of my life feel bad

Pretty sure it’s “sowing,” right? Like sowing seeds? Not sewing clothes?

​@@haldalas I was just about to say this. It was 'sowing', sewing doesn't make sense.

@@iniratagen9740 If I may ask, as someone who's trying to figure out religion, how did that go afterward? Because sometimes I wonder if I'm hearing this too. And I'm not sure if "follow God, not the Bible" is something my own mind is telling me, or something God, who is bigger than religions, sects, and denominations, is telling me.

as a christian i loathe prosperity gospel, its not the true word of God but yet so many people preach it. you can’t promise wealth to people when it’s evident that wealth leads to temptation and sin. not to mention it also erases the idea that we 1) should thank God no matter our circumstances and 2) that we are supposed to give for God. It's not supposed to be for what we could gain- giving was never about ourselves.

Agreed, Jesus literally said that it would be easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.

and they wonder why Christianity dies more each and every year.

Really? Religions of all kinds have been doing this on and off throughout history.

​@@user-zw6th1oq6s That's pretty much exactly what they said. That some forms of religious institutions commonly use that kind of shit. In this case: "Christian" Mega Churches.

Well...religion is kinda of a scam tbh😅

^ a scammy cult

@@gershonford3513not really, it has good moral values

HONESTLY the Church has been scamming people since the start pretty much

@@CerealRaptor142 does it tho? 😐

"True me" God

I cant say i've ever been as surprised upon receiving information that makes this much sense

Came here to say something about prosperity gospel and found this gem. Thank you for saying it so I don't have to.

Sowing isn't always used in relation to money. For example they talk about sowing the word of God a lot.

@@XxMCRroxnonstopxXlol but propsperity gospel types don’t like the word of God… they like money. So you sow money. And when you get nothing back you “didn’t have enough faith” 😐

@@XxMCRroxnonstopxX Seed faith doctrine is a popular belief in prosperity gospel communities. It states that you need to “sow a seed in faith” typically through a type of tithing. They preach that you will literally see a 30,60 or 100% return based on your faith. Like, they think giving money to a preacher because the preacher says so will give them money in the end, directly from god. This is based on a misinterpretation of Matthew 13 and Luke 11. That’s why I believe in this context, this is exactly what they mean.

*Points to any verse in the bible as evidence*

sometimes god's just in a silly goofy mood 😗✌️

​@@drunkpaulocosta9301NAILED IT

God may work hard making crypto, but Roberto works harder

I really wish he would try.

Dont yall in usa still swear by the bible in court? Or is it depending on the state?

​@@lug358 It's not required anymore by law no, though I believe that there are still courts that will offer a bible for "swearing in". Anyone who lives in the states and knows for sure is welcome to correct me on this though

@@nyckh.1872 I'm pretty sure you're allowed to swear in with whatever religious book you associate with, but I may be wrong.

Poor Robert he didn't get an I love you request from Danny

​@@jualizesteyn5625Love you, Robert.

​@jualizesteyn5625 it's okay , I love Robert.

Abel and Caine moment truly

Did they pay tax on it? Maybe he put the crypto as part of the religious institution to render no tax.

So basically bribing god lol

LMAO that’s literally what the Evangelicals left the Catholics over 😂 Babe wake up new indulgences just dropped

it’s like in the Roman Empire right when the Black Plague was spreading around, the Catholic church told grieving families that their loved ones would be guaranteed to go to heaven if they gave money to the church. seems like heaven has been pay to win since forever

⁠@@storeboughtmilk8853defs not since “forever”, paying your way to get into heaven is so far from Biblical truths it’s not even funny

​@@storeboughtmilk8853i wouldn't say since forever. since rich nobles got a hold of it

The only reason pastors have power is because of God though. If people just had a healthy amount of scepticism for everything they consume this wouldn't happen

I think an important distinction for Christians who want to avoid these types of “Christians” is to have faith in God and not solely in the church. I wouldn’t encourage readers of the Bible to question God but definitely question the source of who is telling it to you if it doesn’t sit right with you; talk to others about whether what they’re teaching seems right or not.

could be the baby? babies always be needing attention

True, most pastors don't ever apologize for their crimes

of course someone with Team Jesus in their pfp would say this lmfao

It really is refreshing to have terrible actions called out, while not attributing them to unrelated details

I agree. It’s also a smart move to not alienate any viewers.

Fax

@@negligible_realitywhat’s wrong with it I don’t get it