I needed this info when I was twenty. Survived anyway and now am 80. amazing. this information shoulf be tsught by 7th grade.

And narcissists don't miss you when you're gone, but only miss what you've done for them - and even then, only one or two things. I don't believe there's any sense of gratitude or appreciation in a narcissist.

The frightening thing is that these individuals are growing more in our society. They are in our schools, families and work. They will harm. Run. Do not engage with these individuals. They will destroy your life.

I was with a narcissist for 10 years and it’s, of course, my fault for choosing to stay for so long, but I can’t tell you how true all of these things are. My guy was a level 10 narcissist but No One other than me knew who he truly is. Everyone thought the world of him and respected him. I lost a decade of my young life because of his twisted games. I am finally free.

This ***needs*** to be taught to middle school students. And then again when they're high school students. STOP the cycles! STOP the evil!

When my son died suddenly twenty years ago, I called my mother to tell her and she said,”well, we never saw him that much anyway.” Never mind that she saw him several times every week. When my dad was dying in hospice, she denied him pain medication, telling the nurses he wasn’t any fun when he was, “All doped up.” The doctor who was head of hospice pulled me aside and told me and my sister my mother was a sociopath. I found your UKposts channel today. Already it’s very helpful.

Love yourself enough to run the other way. They will not change.

"You will be harmed ". I've watched this one before and those words go right through me. They're ominous and true. It seems narcissists can slide back and forth on the spectrum. Frightening. They dwell amongst us. Some of us have up close and personal experience. Take Dr. C. at his word. They are dangerous. "You will be harmed ".

They lie to your face, without even a blink.

Sometimes, alone contains joy.

My mother was a diagnosed psychopath. I'm 66 and have suffered all my life with depression and no self esteem. Still in therapy but there's no way out after all these years. My life has been wasted. She should never have had children. It's been a life sentence for me.

I wish I had of known about these different types years ago. I could have saved myself a lot of grief. And waisted years on hoping they would change.

I wish I had understood these things decades ago. I hope young people who see this will take heed.

I learned a lot listening to explain the differences. My ex is narcissist and I didn’t know this until after I married him. He loved to make me doubt myself. He would call me crazy and say @ I didn’t tell you that!”. I felt like he was trying to make me have a nervous breakdown. He was so cruel. But I was not as weak as he tried to make me think I was. I got so tired of his crap and started speaking up. He hated that. I am divorced now and my life is so much better. So glad I got away! So glad.

I just will never understand how ones cannot care, have remorse, continually hurt and harm others. I’m an empathetic human, I’m learning how me and my granddaughters have been manipulated. My oldest had to cut her mom off, this is so sad. It can be such a traumatic situation. Causes PTSD, also, no bouncing. We’re working on this. Thank you so much for teaching so I can share and to many comments that have helped. Many blessings to many.

This is one of the best breakdowns of these disorders I've ever watched! Thank you!

The manipulation by itself could kill you. The stress wears on an actual loving God fearing person.

You hit the nail on the head when you said that they are like a little child with an undeveloped conscience!!!! Arguing with one feels just like arguing with a little kid!!! haha

My ex husband sounds like all three. It's hard to face the fact that I crawled out of that relationship barely functioning. I still struggle but am making slow progress. I was an esteemed professional. I left with nothing. I had no idea what he was doing behind my back. He put on a good show.

Yep, my ex is a sociopathic narcissist. Covert, and cerebral. This confirms it for me.

Discernment is the key! Lord increase our Discernment so we can recognize these predators a mile away and won’t be caught off guard!

From my experience you are 100% correct . So much damage: emotional, psychological, financial. Ruinous . Thank you.

And it appears as though there can be an overlapping of the narcissistic and sociopath characters. So glad I found this channel. Thank you!

I'm with a Sociopath and am working through the grieving process in realizing that they aren't going to change.

I married a psychopath, having been brought up by narc parents. I did get away, but literally had to run. And then i had the fight of my life for years, for our children. He's now in his 80's and recently had a stroke. I would never wish anyone ill.....but it's hard not to with him. Vile, evil, nasty, dangerous man.

Thank you so much for this Valuable information. I have worked as a RN in a mental health facility for years and I have witnessed all types of behavior. The behavior that bothers me the most is the pathological lair with manipulation. These people are very dangerous and the average person is clueless what they are capable of. I have been involved with the DA's office and it appalls me that these type of people are NOT a concern, unless there is violence involved. A narcissist, sociopath, psychopath are experts at playing mind games to those who are unaware of their behavior and innocent people are being seriously harmed. The Police Dept and the DA's office DO NOT CARE about mind games, only violence! Maybe if the DA and PD dept would change their minds about mental illness, became more educated about the disease process, how to identify and help these people, maybe the dreadful killings we hear about everyday would start to decline!!

I love how he's to the point and not bloaded with egotistical fillers. Cold, hard facts of sociopaths/ narcissists, in a general sense.

My mother, brother in law, and grandfather. Life would have been much easier if I'd understood this many years ago. Took a lot to break free.

The word "Dismissive" is too weak to represent a narcissist. Better: The Manipulator

You are a very intelligent man. Yes, it's unbelievable that people and society glamorize the so called bad boys/girls, those who get away with bad things.

It is important, as we learn in psychology, to not confuse warning signs with truth. Look for patterns of continued behavior. Somebody having a bad day doesn’t necessarily mean the person lacks empathy. Or If someone doesn’t agree to a rule, it doesn’t mean they break almost every rule. Be careful labeling, but trust your gut regarding associations. Manipulating and lying is a key trait in any of these categories. None of these types will do an act of generosity unselfishly.

I have personally known all 3 types, and I do have wounds, but I am healing. I am now free of all of that chaos, and thanks to you Dr. Les, and others who help and support us all, I am learning how to avoid engaging in such dangerous relationships in the future! Bless you! 💕

Whatever you do, don't try to get better treatment from them. They see this as manipulative and controlling on your part and it will incur even more abuse from them. The only real solution is to remove yourself from their influence. They are destructive and dangerous to anyone else's well being.

I dated a guy who had alot of these same characteristics of behavior last year. I ran for the hills!!! The man was dangerous!😳

What a beautiful reminder of how important it is to move on from a very difficult experience/relationship in life. Thank you!

Thank you for identifying the differences, Dr. Les. I just got rid of a psychopath I was in "relationship" with for eight years. I'm a survivor, so I'm trying to go easy on myself for being manipulated for so long. Your videos are a comfort and validation. Thanks for making them ☺️ Much peace to all~

Well I know now I’m dealing with a Sociopath. I’m in the final stage of divorce with the settlement mediation in February. I’ve been through all the blame shifting, her lack of responsibility for her cheating, lies, continued affair even after being caught red handed, love bombing and when that didn’t work, the hate mail. It’s like dealing with a 57 year old with a 12 year old’s emotions. As for feeling like a failure, I don’t but it doesn’t lessen the hurt. I felt killing my self would be easier than going through this pain, however I got help and I’m better. Not great but better.

I ended my abusive relationship 3.5 years ago and haven't looked back. Before ending it, and in the early weeks afterwards, I listened and read about this topic. I remember thinking my ex would never do that....smear campaign, electronic stalking, threatening, deliberately using his lack of respect for authority negatively affect me...but he did EVERY SINGLE ONE. If you've been raised in an emotionally abusive family, it's almost impossible to have a point of reference for it. Your videos are among the very best at providing a stable point of reference and I thank you for all that you do. I've just ordered your book The Anger Trap 🖖🏻

This is such an important message and I love how you don't mince words. This needs to be heard loud and clear. Yes, YOU WILL BE HARMED and YOUR PLEAS WILL BE DISMISSED. These two realities are critically important. Thank you. What a wonderful service you're doing sharing your knowledge, experience and wisdom with everyone in this way. I don't mince words either when I directly state YOU ARE SAVING LIVES. One video at a time, your hard work and effort involved in getting these important lessons out to those who need to hear them most will forever be appreciated. Thank you. 😊

Sadly most people have to learn about them the hardest way before they learn how to strongly avoid them. I have no friends or family left and this is just fine with me.

For just shy of twenty years, I was married to a lying, cheating, addictive, mentally and physically abusive sociopath - yours was a near-perfect description. Through online dating, I recently met a man that I thought I was going to connect strongly with and yet, after just one date, I realized that he is (at the very least) a narcissist. I shut that down pretty quickly and now, watching him from afar (we are still in each other's social circle) I know I made the right move. At the tender age of 48, I'm finally learning lol.

Very useful. Where was this guy in the 80s when I allowed people like this to get away with a lot? The charm and ability to read who is vulnerable and who can be taken advantage is spot on. I don't want to get morally high and mighty about myself as I am not perfect. However, videos like this make me realize my own flaws as well as others. Not being equipped with this information back when I was young led to me allowing people repeated opportunities to stay in my life. They always believed they would be forgiven no matter what....and I almost always did. Lesson learned. At least I can help my kids handle these situations differently. Stay safe everyone.

The narcissists actually feels the opposite. “I hate myself, I want to be you but because I can’t be you and have what you have I have to destroy you.” Narcissists are extremely needy. Sociopaths are sloppy. Psychopaths are smooth.

You have described my ex-husband to a T. Unfortunately I spent 17 years with this "person" which imparted much emotional damage. It took me several years to heal but I'm happy to say that I have been healed. God has "restored my soul" Psalm 23

A narcissist, 40 years ago said to me, because of his breeding his blood was of superior quality to mine. I immediately thought he was nuts.

Thank You So Very Much For Sharing Narcissists Don't Care About You As An Individual. They Have No Humanity No Morals No Shame..No Loyalty No Integrity.These Ppl Are Incredibly Dangerous

I believe all presidential candidates should have a psychological evaluation before running for the position of Commander-in-chief. And every year thereafter.

I'm 68, I would have needed this is high school, even junior high The sooner the better, if you might even find one or two in your own family Which sets us up for meeting the next abuser, cuz this. Is what we're used to Pray and meditate, they don't like God we are His creations and the narc hates us They are are perfect lesson.....Don't pick up narcissitic fleas!!! Love and hugs from Oregon

My mother is all 3 ... no joke ... I use to need help when I was a child but I survived her now I’m no contact

This subject should be included and or part demanded by all governments before graduating from high school. This information is very important to learn as well as any type of a broken criminal system. Vulnerables without a system support and family support are the easy targets for this type of in-humans.

I’m still healing after my last bout with a sociopath. The difficult part is to identify the sociopath early on in the relationship so you get out before you are so enmeshed that it’s hard to leave.

Dr. Carter knows Narcissists inside out, and upside down. He is impressive, I must say.

Thanks Dr. Carter. What I find scary is how outwardly charming all three types can present themselves. And I agree with you about media that glamorizes manipulators and predators. It's all interesting as a passive viewer until a narcissist or a psychopath destroys or attempts to destroy your life (or take your life). It's not entertaining when it's you. At least that's my perspective and experience.

Love to you, Dr C. Thank you for helping us untangle all of the confusion and madness in our heads about what is happening in our lives. I hope to be of help to others someday. All this pain and suffering should not be for nothing.. I hope that God calls me to use these past 20 years of abuse to help someone else.

I married and then divorced someone who has every single one of these traits, but never attacks physically. He now is emotionally abusing my children and are isolating them from me. Everyday it is a new rule. I have spent years in therapy to just get away from this mad man, but he still continues to have complete control over my three children. My children are so afraid to speak up because they know their father will just cause more pain. He completely brainwashes them. He is a true monster but appears to be "number one dad." I feel like I sold my soul to the devil when I married him. To top it all off, his brother is a pastor of a large church in Cranberry Twp, PA and his nickname is , Baby Jesus. If only people knew the truth.

Your sentiment," You Exist to be Exploited! " wow...this resonates!!

I survived a marriage to a sociopath or psychopath. Im alive.

My ex was all three: scheming, predator, and narcissist. Young women should be educated about this. It is very confusing if you don't know what is going on.

A timeless gift to all that sit in front the screen seeking another chapter of understanding toxic personalitys and ourselves. I think down the road up and out of someone else's issues that were needlessly, naively absorbed, you get a increased value once out of the brain fog.

Dear God, HOW CAN I GET HELP. ??? My son just turned 25 years old in November. He is EVERY SYMPTOM you described, and even boarderline personality disorder. As I continue to watch you informative videos about these condition, I feel like you are TELLING MY STORY right down to EVERY single minute detail. He showed signs of rebellion, irrational mood swings, out of control anger, excessive destruction of ALL of my property,and personal belongings. ( everything from glass lamp shades to chesterfields, and my 52” tv., 50 telephones) end tables, coffee tables, etc, and even tore doors off their hinges, destroyed rooms by punching holes everywhere he could. There hasn’t been an ounce of let up from actual age of 8 until now, 25. As he grew older, so did the outbursts, trouble, destruction, lying, ( there hasn’t been a truthful word come out of his mouth since he could talk), manulipating , terrorizing, bullying, and intimidation, and the list goes on. I lost my husband 12 years ago, and my son 9 years ago. Since then his demeanour has only escalated. He has been in jail 3 separate occasions. Once for 4 years, the second time was 2 months, and just October til December 19th for 2 months. His CONSTANT repetitive behaviour has destroyed my daughter ( she is all I have left) , and myself emotionally, psychologically, physically, and set us both in a spiraling, never ending FINANCIAL RUIN. Between the both of us, ( mostly her) in excess of 110.000.00, THUS, with these actions, it has caused such friction between our partners that separation has been discussed on more than one occasion. Now, he is no longer allowed in my daughters home, not allowed to see his only nephew, and has burned every bridge he has ever crossed. He was charged with sexual assault, confinement, and destruction of personal property. From age 10 to age 17 I have had him to 7 different doctors, councillors. , psychiatrist. He met each and every one with hesitation and rebellion. Nothing I tried or attempted worked or had any effect. I have been seeking emotional help for most of his life. Now ( we) my daughter and I are giving up. I continued giving, helping, and enabling him for fear of loosing another son, but as of today it’s OVER. ! .

EXCELLENT info!! My last boss had half of the symptoms of a sociopath. Her behaviour was baffling to me, and she was terrible to work for. Thanks for clearing up that mystery.

This will be the future norm. And the 'normal' will become 'unhealthy'. Unless people wake up.

I've lived with a narcissist/sociopath for 28 years (I'm an empath) ... I was highly damaged (and my kids even more so :( BUT after a year and half away from it all....we are learning more and getting stronger and stronger. Thank you for your helpful videos!!

u r so awesomely I thought I was really going crazy because of my narcissists' mother-in-law of 40 years. I felt very trapped by her mean ways with me I realize now she is just sick and cut ties all together except family functions. I have never felt more alive and am healing every day. thanks for all your educational videos. somewhere in Texas

Thank you Dr. Carter. Very informative. They all cause harm!

There is no difference between narcissism and controlling. They are never happy unless things go the way they want.

Thank you for describing the difference between these illnesses. It’s hard to find a clear picture. Now I know that my husband was for sure “just” a malignant narcissist.

When I saw it...I immediately ended the relationship....

I love your videos Dr Carter. It feels like we're having a very laid back and easy conversation about something that is ugly. You have a way of putting it that makes it understandable and increases my confidence. Thank you!

I learned SO MUCH from your video, Sir. You are spot-on! I was vulnerable, and “fooled”, and suffered mental abuse... I am so sad our only son, in his 20’s have these traits... therefore, cannot find a lasting relationship with the girls he dates. He refuses therapy. Thank you for an Excellent video explanation.

Oh my, and to find all three in one man was just my misfortune! 4 months free and starting to feel more relaxed.

My sister was a psychopath criminal. I noted she was unable to attach or relate as early as 5. Thank you for clearly explaining the differences and commonalities so well.

I have been an overtly happy man my whole life.This seems to be like a magnet for the most extreme narc. They prey on baiting the victim into volunteering to walk the plank.

I forgot to mention, that my siblings have high positions in society as well as my ex husband (lawyer) and they seem totally normal and funny and people like their charming ways. They seem like gentlemen and this is the way conartists work and no one would believe me. God bless.

Thanks for the comparison. I thought maybe he was a narcissist. He schemed and preyed on me. No remorse, and he completely dismissed his actions. 10 days after my cancer diagnosis I came home from work to find he had left. He ghosted me. The month prior to that he was in love with me.

I cannot believe the accuracy of this describing my family, they are exactly like the psychopath.

This channel is so good to finally understand these twisted people

My ex boyfriend exhibited all three levels described here. I was in constant battle calling him out on his behavior. 12 years later? Just now he is under medication and in therapy. However a NPD only tries to become a better person to be able to polish their game or gain more with new charming skills. You will never be appreciated by one find someone who wants to spoil you and cherish and treat you as you truly deserve to be loved.

I was married to a narcissist for 25 years - not an easy to leave a very controlling and manipulative person. Aside from his endless spending, verbal abuse, drinking and many other horrible qualities; his extra-marital affairs were endless and they were always MY Fault. The unfortunate part, he had the incredible ability to make me believe HE was right and I would faithfully apologize for being so ugly and forcing him to go out with other women. Getting a divorce and seeking professional help was the best gift I have ever given myself. I've been sane for 20 years now!!! Awesome videos, I hope others discover them prior to dating or marrying these type of personalities.

So true...They really are broken but there's no excuse because they can turn off all of the dysfunction while they are in front of strangers or certain people they put on an act and then as soon as they're in front of the one they abuse alone the dysfunction is turned back on 😪

I had to make my escape as soon as the demon possessed fool was out of sight Thanks to the most high for his grace mercy forgiveness and protection for myself and my children We escaped with our lives The devil seeks to steal kill and destroy

I've got enough distance on a toxic relationship I had with someone on this spectrum of illness that I can say: This would be a good guide to understanding teenagers and politicians.

Thank you for these! For me it's understanding what happened me in the past & why I ended up somewhere I never thought I'd be in a million years. It's so that I can move on and realise that the only mistake I made was to completely trust my now ex covert narcissist husband of 33 years. Any videos on how to regain your strength, self esteem & be who you really were meant to be, would be greatly appreciated...

Yes, Sir! Zero remorse; zero Guilt!

Thank you Dr. Carter, you cannot imagine how your information have helped me. God bless you always.

I think the idea Dr. Carter touched on about society's infatuation with the "bad boy/girl" is important. Society has embraced individualism so much that in entertainment it is no longer the "white hat" that is looked up to but the criminal. It is almost as if society has become the evil entity and these borderline criminals are the saviors. In music, movies and novels it has become more and more about fighting the "system" rather than the individuals who make the system evil.

my dearest dr. i learn so much from you!! your help is much appreciated. i was raised by a mother like this and being an extremely sensitive and intuitive person i knew from a very young age there was something wrong with my mom. i thought that there was a witch that lived inside my mom that would torment my sister and i on an almost daily basis and this gave me nightmares almost every night. i immediately understood what you said about narcissists putting others in harm's way. my sister and i were quite close in age. when my mom realized the attention she got from others, including her friends, when my sister and i became attractive teenagers she took full advantage of this as her image and being perceived as perfect meant everything to her. she would take us to greece in the summer and 'pushed' us to go out with older men as this seemed to 'flatter' her. from a young age we were tormented by her obsession that we must remain virgins or no man would ever marry us and were also prohibited from talking on the phone with them. in greece these the rules seemed to disappear as even though she frowned on sexual activity she was dismissive when we told her about feeling discomfort and embarassment when these men attempted to hold our hand or grabbed our breasts, etc. we were told that these were "real men" and to just go along with it. it was as though she were living her non-existent teenagehood through us!! another time i told her i was attacked by one of these men (we were also encouraged to go out with greek men in our city and she would buy us clothing to "win" us over) but she convinced my dad (he was passive towards her) to talk to me as i was lying to get out of a date!!). over time i realized that not only was this cruel woman harmful to us mentally with her incessant words of abuse on a daily basis (many taking on a sexual tone at a young age which i must deal with even today in my 50's) but she didn't even care about our physical safety!! i knew it was time to cut her off (after many tries because admitting that you never truly had a mom was one of hardest things i had to face) when she began treating my son in a manner i found unsatisfactory. i couldn't protect myself when i was a child but i could certainly protect my child!! i apologize if there are spelling or grammar errors but i can't bear to proofread this as i haven't thought about this for awhile. i am, however much better without this deeply troubled person in my life. the things i have gone through with this woman my dearest doctor and readers would make your skin crawl. putting a name to her illness makes me feel better as i thought that either i was making it more of an issue in my mind than it really was (i was also told this by her and my sister who also turned out to be like my mom) or that her illness had no name because i found it impossible to believe that other mothers could be so cruel to their own flesh and blood. you have given me wonderful information, dr.!!

Les, your videos about narcissism are really helping me. Thank you so much for your work on this subject, and for sharing it with the world!

It seems to me that narcissists and sociopaths can be fun to be around casually (fun at a party), but you wouldn't want your best friend married to one. Nor would you really want any kind of close relationship, even friendship, with one. Psychopaths outright dangerous.

This is very enlightening. I've come to the conclusion that my brother is a sociopathic (if that's a word) narcissist. I'd like to add that he is also a pathological liar. To say that he is evil is an understatement.

Just wanted to thank you for putting SO MUCH work into these videos. You offer such a valuable service to the world for free. I'm going to go buy your books as a small way of giving back. Though, really, I'm sure I will get more out of your books than I can ever pay for. Very grateful.

WOW. This was what i always tried to figure out. I knew or rather sensed danger in spite of the charisma and seeming concern and i have finally learned to act on my intuition..and escaped both a sociopathic friend and a psychopath i lived with 23 years. You have confirmed all my hidden fears and anxieties. They are both blocked. A simple thank you is all i can say but I say it with all my heart. You are a blessing from the spiritual world.

This was so valuable, I watched it twice.

my father was a sociopath. my sister is a sociopath. and my ex-husband is a sociopath. the harm and damage that they did to me is extensive. I appreciate your videos. thank you.

When we become complicit by silence, compromising or condoning such aberrant behaviors we have taken for granted the good - whereby we encounter perversions rampant as we witness in our world. Such evil multiplies and never will be satiated in good. The very element bypassed in such participation, overtly, covertly. Vital to hold fast the good! Pamela, Louisiana

The narcissists in my life ended up literally poisoning me when I wanted to move away and claim independence. I wish I'd watched these videos years ago. I was so young and naive when I came into contact with this person. 18 years old. What a terrible experience.

Ex bf was working security and due to that he had to drive a lot during the night. One day when he came back he told me how he hit a cat on the motorway while driving. He proceeded to a VERY detailed description of the incident almost as if he had still images in his head. He told me about "the fear that he saw in the cats face" , the cats momevents during the hit, the condition of the body after, the furr left on the car every single little disturbing detail. Then he said that he felt the responsibility on taking a life and he seemed almost proud. At the end he said he felt sorry for the owner that would look for his cat in the morning and i saw him trying to hold a laugh while trying to appear sad. After that i had to stop fooling myself that this guy was normal. I had spent 3 years getting abused and gashlighted and lied to and all the rest but that was sort of waking up call. There was something very very creepy in the way he described the whole thing and his demeanour

Your communication style puts a person at ease while also getting to the point. Thank you, Liked, Shared and Subscribed with a Rung Bell :)

I knew my husband had more than narcissist tendencies. Now I know what it is! He is a sociopath!!! I had to listen three times to be sure. Thank you Doctor. No wonder I feel crazy every day 😮

Thank you for providing information that now I understand who these parents were to me. No wonder they had no warmth of feelings or understanding of what I felt or my sisters. We were tools for their use which is the sorry excuse for parents. What I learned from my Sociopath mom - never to be this way towards my children but to raised them with patience, encouragement, and love and to be anything they wanted in this life. This is their life which I instilled to them values to live by. I am so lucky to have had them in my life after all. People ask how I cope - I'm an "empath" that tried to deal with things as I was thrown under the bus so many times.